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Stairway to Stardom
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I Believe This Is What You Call "Givin' It All You Got"
Nevermind that "all you got" is pretty awful. It's the effort that counts, right? I have no idea why Lola Perazzo, performing the "Thriller" dance on the awesome '80s talent show "Stairway to Stardom," didn't make it big.
Flashback: Have You Serenaded Your Hairdresser Today?
Why this chick sang a song for her stylist is mind boggling — frankly, her fugly head of hair needed some serious attention. (And where is Tim Gunn when you need him?) She's lucky her hairdresser was nowhere in sight; those scissors could've done some major damage.
The Napoleon Dynamite of the '80s
Remember when Napoleon calmly took the stage in his unfashionable duds and moved awkwardly to the music for all his classmates to see? This chick does exactly that, but in the dark and on public access television. She thrusts, bounces, and masquerades around like some sort of monster out of the "Thriller" vid — but she's got no costume.
Homemade Horror
The horror movie music and lighting weren't even necessary. It's frightening enough that this woman would bend over backwards (literally), foam at the mouth, and then allow the camera to film her at this angle--all for a mere 15 seconds of fame. Even the dog looks scared.
Like the Gong Show...
...only--without the gong. This tiny dancer looks like she's dancing on invisible hot coals. Bless her little heart.
Before There Was American Idol...
...There was Stairway to Stardom. Filmed in what looks like your uncle's rec room, Stairway to Stardom was the show where a thousand dreams set sail...and probably sank into oblivion. But you can't say they didn't fight the poignant fight.
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