This 911 call cannot be real, but I so hope it is. Of course, I also hope the lady who got attacked by a warthog (?!) is OK, too.
Working as a 911 dispatcher has got to be interesting. Take this call. I can't tell if this dude is serious or joking.
I am serious about food, lunch, and, yes, sandwiches. But dooood! This is just...I...it's rare that I have no few words.
The following may seem unlikely — but think again. A while ago, we overheard an immature 911 dispatcher crack a joke in the middle of some woman's urgent call for help. Funny?
In America, we dial 911 in the event of an emergency. But as we've already observed, a few folks in the US have a tough time understanding the "emergency" concept. While these dimwits call in to score a date or request math tutoring, the truly urgent calls must wait their turns.
We've already seen one desperate diva attempt to use 911 as a telephone dating service. If you thought that was an anomaly, wait until you hear some dumbass call in for directions or another dumbass call in for baking instructions. One chick almost got it right when she called to report a violent altercation between two men — in a movie.
Nothing beats a perilous story with a happy ending, especially when we get video footage of an EMT doing mouth-to-mouth on a cat out of it. This is too good. How does life come up with this shit?
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College Humor tells us that the guy calling 911 and freaking out because he ate pot brownies was a cop. Best lines? "Time is going by really, really, really slow" and "Please come...I think we're dying.
It's so sad that we have a separate 911 humor category now. People, the definition of "emergency" is in the dictionary--look it up. It doesn't mean "How do I cook my turkey" or "I don't have an ice scraper for my car" or "I want my dollar or my taco, bitch."