TresSugar

Awkward! Wedding Planning With Fiancé Causing Tension

TresSugar — Fri, 01 May 2009 07:00:00 -0700

I know a very modern bride who is beginning to wonder if she really knows the guy she's marrying. It's not that she's having second thoughts - it's just that planning their wedding is highlighting differences of opinion about tradition and convention she didn't know were there.

For example, this bride is hip to the fact that weddings are not unique events. Lots of people get married. At the same time, she wants her wedding to have a personal, nonconformist touch. This is where the conflict with her more traditional fiancé has come in. He values conformity and sees it as a social good. Unlike his fiancée, he actually cares what other people think.

So what are the differences of opinion they have about how they should plan their wedding? To find out read more.

First off, she doesn't want name cards at the table. He thinks they're classy; she thinks they're an unnecessary cost and a waste of paper.

Secondly, both have agreed to cupcakes instead of wedding cake (OK, so traditional guy is a little nonconformist), but he wants vanilla (because "it's supposed to be that way") and she likes chocolate because . . . it's more delicious.

Last but not least - the guest list. The bride wants to give their moms a guest limit so that they don't invite too many people and overrun the wedding with people they don't know. He doesn't want to tell his mom that there's a limit and, in addition, he thinks having a lot of diverse people will make them look good to other people.

Should weddings conform to traditional wedding etiquette at the expense of personal touches, practicality - or the bride's wishes? How should this bride and groom get over their differences and celebrate their union? And finally, have you ever experienced something similar?

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Relationship Protocol: What Are You Still Splurging on as a Couple?

DearSugar — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 06:00:00 -0800

Money is tight for pretty much everyone these days, and no matter what you do to save, it's close to impossible to cut back on everything all the time. Most couples I know have rituals - Friday night date nights, going to the movies on Sundays, or playing on a bowling league - but whatever their tradition is, it probably costs money.

If you're having to pick and choose what activities to keep in the mix, tell me, what are you still spending money on as a couple?

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Relationship Protocol: What Holiday Tradition Have You Created?

DearSugar — Fri, 28 Nov 2008 08:00:00 -0800

I think one of the best parts about being in a relationship is creating new traditions together, unique to the life you live as a couple. Of course, incorporating each other's family traditions is always fun, but so is instating an after-Thanksgiving hike with your hubby every year or a putting up Christmas lights while eating your leftovers. If this is something you've done in your relationship, tell us, what holiday traditions have you created with your significant other?

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Dear Quiz: Out With the Old (Lingerie), in With the New

DearSugar — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 12:00:00 -0700

Although I can't think of a better reason to buy some new lingerie than a honeymoon, showing off new skivvies as a married woman certainly isn't mandatory. But back when tradition ruled courtship and marriage, things were different. A wedding was the transition from girl to woman, and this step was reflected in a myriad of customs. One such practice that a soon-to-be bride partook in before her wedding was to collect new linens, personal effects, and particularly, lingerie to bring to her new home. Do you know what this compilation of bridal items was called?

To see all of our wedding coverage, check out IDoSugar.com.

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Handle This: He Wants You to Convert

DearSugar — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 16:00:00 -0700

You’ve been with your boyfriend for a year now, and things are pretty serious but he's recently mentioned some concerns he’s having about the differences in your religious upbringings and beliefs. His family is both traditional and dedicated when it comes to their religion, whereas you're open and uncommitted to anything.

In an effort to lay everything on the table before things get more serious, he lets you know that you’ll have to convert to his religion in order to marry him. You’re more than willing to learn more, but you feel unsure about a full conversion. You love him so how would you handle this?

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A Do or a Don't: Garter Belts

DearSugar — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:00:00 -0700

The garter-belt toss is a particular wedding tradition that though still in use, hasn’t stood the test of time quite like the bouquet toss and the white dress. I’ve never seen a garter-belt toss that didn’t somehow feel awkward or forced, but I imagine if it's done tastefully, it can be cute. I'm a traditional girl, but still, there’s something weird about watching the bride lift her skirt in front of her closest family and friends! But what do you think? Are garter belts classic or just plain crass?

To see all of our wedding coverage, check out IDoSugar.com.

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Ladies, It's Time to Pop the Question!

DearSugar — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 07:00:00 -0800

Supposedly an old British custom had it that women were allowed to propose on leap year day, today, February 29, and their object of affection wasn't allowed to turn to them down! Obviously in contemporary society, there are no written rules about female marriage proposals; however, while there are many notions of romance that have become somewhat old-fashioned in our culture, like saving ourselves for marriage, society still seems to think that it should be the man who gets down on bended knee.

Sure, there are many couples that reach a mutual decision on marriage, but when you hear about those grand or endearingly thoughtful proposals, it always seems to be the man’s doing. I want to know why ladies don’t plan romantic proposals for their guys. Or do they? Do you think that the male-only proposal is outdated? Would you ever be the one to pop the question?

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Do Tell: Do You Have a Valentine's Day Tradition?

DearSugar — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 07:00:00 -0800

Every year on Valentine's Day, my parents eat dinner at In-N-Out and head straight to Krispy Kreme for dessert. Their tradition started out as a joke, but they had so much fun the first year they did it, they haven't skipped a year since! Now I'm sure not many people are as random as my parents, but I wouldn't be surprised if others have Valentine's Day traditions too, so ladies, do tell, what's yours?

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Do Tell: What's Your Christmas Tradition?

DearSugar — Tue, 25 Dec 2007 07:10:07 -0800

Even though I'm Jewish, I grew up celebrating Christmas. Every year, we have the immediate family over to my parents' house, and the seven of us listen to Christmas music while opening gifts (stockings first, of course) by the fireplace. We toast champagne and then sit down to brunch. The older we get, the later and later our Christmas festivities begin, even though I still have a hard time sleeping in on Christmas day!

I love hearing about other people's traditions so ladies, do tell: What's your Christmas tradition?

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Dear Poll: Did you buy your Groom a Wedding Gift?

DearSugar — Mon, 04 Jun 2007 14:45:00 -0700

With so many wedding day traditions out there, it's hard to keep them all straight. Nowadays most brides and grooms give each other a special gift right before walking down the aisle, typically delivered by the best man and maid of honor. What I want to know is, did you buy your groom a wedding day gift?

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