TresSugar

True Confession - Is Sex For the Thrill of It Forgivable?

DearSugar — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 09:00:00 -0700

I know how much you all love our Sunday Confessional, so my friend at True Confessions is joining forces with me to bring you a midweek confessional! Weigh in and tell us if you forgive or not forgive the confessional below.

"I'm sleeping with my best friend. I work with him and I could be severely disciplined if anyone found out about us. I like knowing that what we are doing is wrong, and truth be told, it's probably the only reason I'm doing it. Is having sex just for the thrill of it forgivable?"

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Are Teens Growing Up Too Fast or Too Slowly?

TresSugar — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 15:00:00 -0800

When I first saw this headline on Newsweek, "Why Teenagers Are Growing Up So Slowly Today," I thought, whaaa? With all the sexting and drugs, aren't teens growing up too fast?

Just because teens are doing adult things doesn't mean they are acting like adults, argue Joseph Allen and Claudia Worrell Allen, authors of Escaping the Endless Adolescence. By sheltering adolescents from work and other grownup issues in cookie-cutter high schools, we may be preventing their brains from maturing. Says Allen: "We don’t give teens enough ways to take risks that are productive." That results in bad risky behavior for cheap thrills and a generation of 25 year olds who act like teenagers. Do you think there's any truth to the argument that not treating teens like adults actually stunts their adulthood?

Waterboarding "Thrill Ride" Hits Coney Island: Political Art?

CitizenSugar — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 09:00:07 -0700

Folks trekking out to Coney Island are looking for a little summer diversion involving water - but the newest attraction to grace the boardwalk takes that expectation and adds a political message. Called the "Waterboard Thrill Ride," the sideshow is decorated with SpongeBob, advertises that "it dont [sic] Gitmo better" and charges $1 for a look through a barred window onto what appears to be an interrogation scene.

Robots portray a prisoner and an interrogator. After the dollar is paid, the lights come on and the prisoner begins to convulse violently as water is poured on his face. The artist behind the installation says its aim is to provoke people into thinking critically about the technique.

He says, "robot waterboarding became a way of exploring the issue without doing any harm. It's putting a unique experience on the table. And it doesn't take a great leap of the imagination to look in there and say: 'That's really what's going on? That's crazy.'" And who doesn't fancy a little torture demo with their corndog?

There's a video of the "ride" in action, including reaction from some bystanders, some of whom hadn't heard of waterboarding before. In that sense, is it a decent public service - or does it turn a serious message into a silly sideshow?

Have You Ever Dated the Same Person as Your Friend?

TresSugar — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 11:00:00 -0700

Last night on How I Met Your Mother, we saw the rare benefits that can come from dating a friend's ex. On the episode, Barney (played by Neil Patrick Harris) looks to his best friend Ted for tips on how to date his new girlfriend Robin. If you don't follow the show, I'll fill you in. Robin and Ted dated for a while, broke up, and remained friends. Now, Robin is dating Barney.

To help out his friend, Ted gives Barney a lesson in Robin 101. Conveniently, Ted is a college professor, so he and Barney meet in his classroom where Ted spills the beans on everything, from Robin's surprising erogenous zones to a crucial list of five things never to do in front of Robin. Needless to say, Robin is not thrilled when she finds out about these lessons.

While watching the episode I couldn't help but think that the characters make the potentially awkward situation of dating your friend's ex seem pretty fun and easy. Have you ever had a lover in common with your friend?

Photo courtesy of CBS

Oh, Snap! Hill Thrills Haitian Nation

TresSugar — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 11:00:00 -0700

With all the Obamamania going on, it's easy to forget that Hillary Clinton is the US Secretary of State. Yesterday, she was welcomed by Haitian President Rene Preval to the presidential palace in Port-au-Prince. Her visit highlights Washington's support - symbolically and monetarily - for the poor and politically fragile nation.

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Department of Homeland Security Will Be Thrilled

GiggleSugar — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 13:00:00 -0800

According to the pranksters who suggest that everyone should try this, here's how you do it: "Inflate balloons and tie to car. Drive like a bat out of hell. Watch people on the highway freak out! Enjoy." I bet these guys are the same ones who think dropping bowling balls from overpasses onto poor, unsuspecting drivers is a good time, too.

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Hump Day: What Are Some Unconventional Erogenous Zones?

TresSugar — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 07:00:00 -0700

Welcome to Hump Day, TrèsSugar's sex advice column. Are you confused about sex? Do you have trouble having an orgasm? Is there something you'd like to try but you're worried it's too weird? Send your questions to TrèsSugar, and our friend Dr. Charlie Glickman from Good Vibrations will offer his sound advice!

Today's Question:

“I would like to be a better lover. What are some unconventional erogenous zones?” To hear Dr. Glickman's answer, read more

Well, I suppose that depends on who you ask. After all, what one person considers “unconventional” is someone else’s favorite place to visit. But even so, there are some spots that not everyone knows about.

For the guys, men’s nipples are an often-overlooked pleasure zone. Some guys like pinching or twisting, but get a firm grip first. Or try sucking on them. Either way, start off light and slowly increase until you find the right level.

You could also spend a little time with his prostate. The prostate gland is found by inserting a well-lubricated finger into the anus and curving it towards the navel. It’s about the size of a golf ball, although much softer. It’s very similar to the G-spot so try stroking it, making circles or a windshield-wiper motion. Prostate play is a great addition to oral sex and it makes lots of guys’ toes curl. If you’re concerned about anal play and cleanliness, grab a glove. Some men worry that anal play is strictly gay; but remember, who you want to have sex with doesn’t have to have anything to do with what types of sex you like. (Expert Guide to Anal Play for Men or Bend Over Boyfriend are good references.)

To make your girl smile, give her clitoris or her A-spot (between her cervix and G-spot) some attention. It's at the deepest part of the vagina on the front wall, so if someone is on her back, insert a slim, curved vibrator or dildo and curve it upwards. If she’s face down, curve it down. Fingers can work if they’re a bit longer than average, too. There’s still some controversy about the A-spot and it’s not clear yet how much different women enjoy stimulating it but some women report that A-spot play leads to more vaginal lubrication and intense orgasms.

Quite a few women also report that perineum massage feels wonderful. In part, it’s because the perineal sponge is there. It’s a sort of, well, spongy tissue that engorges during arousal and it contains lots of nerve endings. Try a massage or using a vibrator there, especially during oral sex. In addition, massaging the perineum can help the pelvic muscles relax, which increases blood flow and can make both vaginal and anal penetration easier.

Of course, all of these technical skills and hot spots won’t make you a better lover if you’re not paying attention to your partner. Ask them what their favorite spots are and how they like to be touched. Some people have difficult describing what they like, but there’s an easy way to work with that. Give them two options and ask them which one they liked better. That can make it a lot easier to get the info you need to give your sweetie a thrill.

Cute Alert: Puffin Is Having Waaay Too Much Fun

TresSugar — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 08:30:00 -0700

I was in Montreal recently, and just had to stop by their awesome Insectariam and Biodome, which boasts different ecosystems, including a tropical forest, a marine ecosystem, and the Arctic and Antarctic. I almost missed this frolicking puffin - and boy am I glad I didn't! This little dude was thrilled to be swimming, bobbing, and generally being a goofball - and we were thrilled to see him.

Sex Toy or Roller Coaster?

TresSugar — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 04:00:00 -0700

Since sex toys and roller coasters depend on thrills, length, and speed, it's not surprising that both seem to draw from the same pool of names. Sure, you've got your fairly obvious Eroscillator vibrators and Cyclone coasters, but other labels sound virtually interchangeable. Can you tell your amusement park rides from your more personal amusements? Take my quiz.

Take the quiz

Being Dumped: You May Want Him More - But Like Him Less

TresSugar — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 08:30:00 -0700

The Rolling Stones may have understood that you can't always get what you want - but it took a group of market researchers (who perhaps understand human desire better than Lacanian psychoanalysts?) to demonstrate that you don't always like what you want.

Although you may pine after and begin chasing someone who dumped you, a new study from the Stanford School of Business shows, you may not like him or her or lose interest once you get them back again.

“For many people, wanting and liking are two separate things that can become contradictory," according to researcher Baba Shiv, professor of marketing at SGSB. "When someone is thwarted from obtaining his original desire, he, in fact, comes to find the attractiveness and appeal of his target to be diminished. Yet, perversely, he may feel he wants it even more. The thrill becomes the chase."

Who’s more susceptible to this perverse push-pull motivation? People who tend to express emotions with lower intensity and, according to researchers, that means more women than men. Hotheaded people, if rebuffed by someone, tend to respond by turning down their interest and their desire. Their attitude, says Ab Litt, the doctoral student who co-authored this study is, “It’s not so great, and I don’t want it anyway.” (They generalized that although women may experience emotion more richly, they are less "emotionally reactive" while men tend to act with more "raw intensity.")

Ever wonder why that new bag or random trendy gewgaw may be unavailable even though you showed up at Barneys first thing in the morning to get it? Because marketers like those at Stanford are studying your love habits and deciding that you'll want something more if it's made scarce! Good thing I'm a hothead.

Are you a "want more/like less" type or a "can't have it/didn't want it anyway" type?

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