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The 80's
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Flashback: '80s Music Vest
Watch out iPod. There's an audio player back in town and it's bigger, dorkier, and louder than ever. It's a music playing garment with built-in shoulder speakers, so the wearer can listen to her funked up '80s music and share it with everyone who doesn't want to hear it too!
Flashback: The California Raisins Promote Reading
Let me get this straight: Someone thought the best way to get kids excited about reading was to have a handful of rapping raisins promote it? "Nature's candy" is more likely to send kids running for the local restroom, not the library. The PSA folks should have employed a handful of break dancing fingers instead.
Billy Squier: Pretty in Pink in "Rock Me Tonight"
There was a moment in the 80's when gender codes were much less rigid than they are even now. In fact, 80's dudes make 90's metrosexuals look downright butch. In the following Billy Squier video for "Rock Me Tonight," Squier is, according to this genius, winding down "alone in cozy pink and white sherbet-colored PJs from the Richard Simmons collection."
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Flashback: '80s Chipmunk Punk
You know you're in for a doozie when the commercial samples a song from the album and assures you that there's nothing wrong with your TV set — the song just sounds that way. Someone in a studio fast-forwarded through a bunch of hit tunes and — voila! — produced an inaudibly high-pitched, cracked-out '80s punk pop music album by Alvin and the Chipmunks.
Flashback: '80s Bollywood Music Vid
If we think that the Bollywood music vids of today look and sound like madness run amok, then imagine what they delivered back in the '80s. Hmm. .
Flashback: Low-Budget '80s Advertising
Don't let the awkward dancing and forced hype fool you. This is not an infomercial for another lame-ass "greatest hits" album. It's a low-budget ad for another lame-ass local restaurant posing as a lame-ass "greatest hits" album — natch.
Flashback: Move Your Boogie Body
So many things from the high '80s have made a resurgence: skinny jeans, Members Only jackets, and Fresh Prince of Bel-Air cocked and oversized baseball caps. The one thing I don't see returning is the use of the word "boogie" in any unironic way. "Hey, wanna boogie?"
Flashback: The NKOTB Fan Club
The New Kids on the Block were a hit boy band back in the late '80s and early '90s. Who would've thunk that they could reunite over a decade later and still have fans traveling far, lining up, and sleeping in tents on NYC street corners to see them perform live on the Today Show? If NKOTB's middle-aged female fans of today are anything like the teenage zombies who adored them back in the day, then I'm officially scared.
Flashback: Frat Boys Seek SWMs to Booze and Party With SWFs
I'm sure this "better than cool" recruitment vid from the '80s is entertaining — after a long night of beer pong and keg stands. But I really don't know how these frat boys thought they'd attract new members by showing off their collective lack of talent and originality. From Fabio to Andrew Dice Clay to Slash, these dudes are a pack of posers.
The Rise & Fall Of The 80's Sitcom Singer
You may not know him by face or name, but you most certainly know him by voice. He's the guy that sang all the popular TV show theme songs in the late 80's and early 90's. He became an overnight success after recording the theme song for a little known show called "Full House."
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