TresSugar

DearSugar Needs Your Help: What's So Great About Strip Clubs?

DearSugar — Sat, 21 Feb 2009 09:00:00 -0800

DearSugar and Grossed Out Gretchen need your help. Her boyfriend enjoys the occasional jaunt to the strip clubs with his buddies, but she doesn't understand the thought process behind it. I'm sure many of you have experienced this before, so do you have any words of wisdom for her?

Dear Sugar,

Why do attached men go to strip clubs? It's a topic of conversation that I try to bring up with my boyfriend, but he brushes me off every time I broach the subject. I just don't understand why they spend money to see a strange naked women who won't dance for them for less than $50, when they could go home to the women they love and do the horizontal tango for free! I totally get that men need their guy time, but why can't they do it at a bar that doesn't involved scantily clad women? - Grossed Out Gretchen

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News to Me: Male Strip Clubs Just For Women

DearSugar — Mon, 21 Jan 2008 11:00:00 -0800

As it turns out, strip clubs solely directed at women are all the rage in Moscow these days according to Reuters. And these aren't just for bachelorette parties or fiftieth birthday celebrations. Women are heading to clubs for any old occasion, including your average cocktail hour. Interestingly enough, the article states:

Unlike the female version, male striptease rarely involves full nudity. . . . club workers say sex is not a priority for the women.

I find it fascinating that the notion of a strip club solely for women in Moscow is an everyday occurrence, while here in the US, it's something most women have never experienced, let alone frequent on a weekly basis. Perhaps if social norms were different here, more women would be spending their free nights at the local strip joint for a nice martini and a lap dance. Would you consider visiting strip clubs - outside of novelty occasions - if it was more socially acceptable?

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Finger Lickin' Wrong

GiggleSugar — Fri, 14 Dec 2007 09:19:25 -0800

Since when are strip clubs in competition with fried chicken joints?

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You Asked: How Do I Forgive My Husband for This??

DearSugar — Wed, 05 Sep 2007 06:00:00 -0700

Dear Sugar--

What would you do if your husband spent $1,400.00 of your joint money that was to be used to pay off our credit card debt on a stripper at a club for 3.5 hours!? I am not anti-strip clubs by any means, but the fact that he used our money makes my blood boil. I love my husband and this was an isolated incident, but I am just sick with anger and I don't know what to do with it. Please help! -- Pissed off Pamela

To see DEARSUGAR's answer read more

Dear Pissed off Pamela --

Wow, I have to tell you I would be beyond pissed too. $1400.00 is a lot of money to waste at a strip club especially when it's shared money meant to go towards your bills. Get your anger out and let him have it - tell him how inappropriate it was to spend money and how it made you feel to know he spent it on other women. Just because you aren't anti-strip clubs it doesn't mean you don't have a right to be furious. There's a time and a place for them but clearly this instance wasn't the time or the place.

If you weren't in credit card debt, I would tell you to go out and treat yourself to a new, expensive handbag and ask him how it feels to see where you are spending your joint money. Since that obviously isn't the responsible thing to do in this situation, you might want to think about opening a separate bank account. If you put your portion of expense funds into an account that he doesn't have access to, the next time he has a wild hair he will only be able to waste his own money - not the both of yours. Even if this was an isolated incident, I think it's important for your husband to know there are consequences to his actions. I wish you luck Pamela and hopefully your husband has learned his lesson.

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Cheesy Strip Club Commercial

GiggleSugar — Tue, 08 May 2007 14:00:00 -0700

Like strip clubs themselves, this commercial doesn't leave much to the imagination. It lives up to its low-budget potential, though, and even adds a few misogynistic touches for good measure. Warning: you'll need a prescription for nausea after this one, folks.

You Asked: What's so Great About Strip Clubs Anyway?

DearSugar — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 13:00:00 -0700

Dear Sugar--
How does one deal with the fact that her boyfriend goes to strip clubs with friends? He swears he doesn't "join in" as the others do... but how could he not? I'm trying to be understanding but it is driving me crazier by the day. Plus, I view strippers as dirty and slutty so it is hard to say 'have fun hun!" --Skeptical Sadie

To see DEARSUGAR's answer read more

Dear Skeptical Sadie--
Men go to strip clubs for all kinds of reasons, and although they have many negative stigmas attached to them, most men look but don't touch. How frequent does your boyfriend visit these clubs? Boys will be boys, but something tells me the strip club isn't the real issue here. Are you having trust issues with your boyfriend? Do you have a history of infidelity in your past that is making you sensitive to his behavior?

Your boyfriend's strip club escapades could be his way of "male bonding," but every woman views strippers, pornography, etc. differently, so if you are not on board with his nights out with the guys, let him know how his behavior is making you feel. Relationships are all about trust and compromise, so be open and honest with your boyfriend and hopefully he will see your perspective and curtail his sleazy excursions.

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Turning People on . . . to Veganism

GiggleSugar — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 09:00:40 -0800

The owner of Casa Diablo in Portland, OR, was having a hard time selling locals on his Mexican vegan food. So he turned his restaurant into the world's first vegan strip club. Apparently, Portland has more strip clubs than any other city, not to mention a large vegan population. This video is brilliant in so many ways, not the least of which is this quote: "Even the meat-eating girls get to eat here free, so when they eat our food, they get turned on to vegan food."

Group Therapy: Owning a Strip Club?

Tue, 25 Mar 2008 03:00:00 -0700

My boyfriend's brother is wanting to open up a bar or a strip club and he wants my boyfriend to go in on it with him. He said that they would just be silent investors and they would hire people to run either place so essentially, they would just be making money off of it but truth be told, I'm not sure how I feel about this. I've been to strip clubs before and they don't bother me that much, but I'll admit that I'm a little insecure about it. I do trust him but I don't necessarily want him to be around strippers all day long. Also, I don't like the stigma attached to these types of establishments. So, if this plan goes through, how do I deal with it? Should I be worried?

[EDITOR'S NOTE: To be involved in more GROUP THERAPY, click here]

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How Do I Handle This Strip Club Situation?

Tres Community — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 06:00:15 -0800

This post comes from Group Therapy in our TrèsSugar Community. Feel free to add your advice in the comments!

First of all my husband and I have been married for half of a year now. He's in the Navy and just got deployed, but right before the deployment he was sent to Hawaii for one day. I dropped him off at the airport and it was so hard for me to let him go. He called from Hawaii and we talked for five minutes then he said he had to go and he would call back.

As I was checking our bank account to check on the bills I noticed he had paid to go in to some type of club. While crying my eyes out because of how much I already missed him and knowing he wasn't coming home any time soon, I waited for him to call back. When he finally did I got him to tell me the truth and it turned out to be a strip club. This was his first time going into a strip club. The problem is that I feel so offended and disrespected. I know I'm not unattractive, and I'm very open minded in our sex life. So to me it seems as if I'm not enough for him, and that he didn't care about how I feel about strip clubs. The fact that he was lusting over those girls makes me so angry and upset.

To see the rest, .

When we talked I was so mad and disappointed and couldn't stop crying. But after a while I realized that I've been told not to say anything negative or upsetting to him since he was going on deployment to a very stressful environment. I won't be able to talk to him at all while he's gone, I can only send emails but I can't confront him there either. So I had to pretend that I got over it and that I was OK, so he wouldn't feel bad and guilty. But in reality I feel so disgusted and can't take the thought of him wanting someone else. I'm alone and don't have any family here, this is our first deployment and I'm still trying to handle it. He made things so much worse for me, now I'm not just worried about his safety, but also at the thought of when he goes to a port he's going to cheat on me. I'm just hurt and feel resentment towards him, but for as long as he's out I have to pretend I'm fine and support him through the emails. I know some people might think I'm over reacting, but to me this is just like cheating.

There's lots of great stuff going on in our community - join it, check it out, share your posts or advice in the great groups and maybe we'll feature it here on TrèsSugar!

What Do You Know About Strip Clubs and the Recession?

TresSugar — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 04:00:00 -0700

Strip clubs have seen a hit to profits thanks to the recession. Men still want to see naked women dance for them, but they have less money to spend on high-end perks like steak dinners and pricey cigars. The Wall Street Journal wrote a piece this week all about how the economy has impacted the live adult entertainment industry.

The strip club industry might be the last on your list of industries to bail out, but the hard times aren't so good for the women who strip - they're getting hired for less, and taking home less money in tips. Test your intuition and take this quiz to find out what you know about strip clubs.

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