TresSugar

Dear Poll: When Sharing a Bed, Does Size Matter?

DearSugar — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 08:00:00 -0700

One of my friends and her beau must always sleep in a king-size bed. When they go to a hotel, they request one, and she's reluctant to stay with me because my full-size guest bed is "soooo tiny." (Hey, at least it's not a twin!) I guess they need their space to spread out in order to catch some zzzz's.

So I was wondering, when sleeping with someone else, does the size of the bed matter to you?

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A Do or a Don't: Sharing a Bed With Your Girlfriends

DearSugar — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 13:00:00 -0700

In high school and even in college, I happily crawled right in bed with my friends when I was staying with them; in fact, I might know some of my closest friends’ sleeping habits better than their significant others. But as we’ve gotten older, sleeping in bed with a girlfriend has become less appealing, not to mention so many of us are already sharing our beds to begin with!

While I still think it's fun to have sleepovers from time to time, there are some people who feel strongly that being bed buddies with your BFF is a total don't. So ladies, is there a certain age when sleeping together is just inappropriate or weird? Weigh in and tell me your thoughts - is sharing a bed with your girlfriend a do or a don't?

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Stranger Than Fiction: Car Crashes Into Couple's Bedroom

TresSugar — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 12:30:00 -0700

Imagine if you will, sleeping soundly in your bed with your boyfriend. Maybe you're spooning, maybe he's snoring, you're dreaming of kittens ice-skating...whatever.

Suddenly, a car crashes through your bedroom. Motor fluid sprays in your now-awake faces as you both struggle to get out from under the weight of the car, which now lies on top of you.

Well, that's exactly what happened to two Nevada college students last week when a drunk driver, thinking he was headed into the home his ex-girlfriend now shares with a new boyfriend, drove instead into their bedroom at 4 a.m.

Only Trent Wood's lower body was pinned by the car, but his screaming girlfriend Kristin Palmer's entire body was pinned. In less than an hour, thanks to neighbors who called 911, emergency workers removed the car from the couple. Wood says he was ecstatic he and his girlfriend only suffered minor scrapes and burns, and not paralysis as he feared.

He told a reporter, "When you experience something like that there's no limits anymore, you can try to do whatever you want to do. We feel like we have more of a purpose, like we were meant to live." I bet the drunk driver, who is up sh*t creek without a paddle (or car), has the opposite sentiment.

Awkward! My Friend Keeps Oversharing Her Sex Life

TresSugar — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 10:00:00 -0700

Thanks to a reader with an issue (sorry, reader!), we have an awkward scenario requiring your advice. (Have some awkward tales of your own? Join our Awkward! group to get etiquette advice from other readers - that's where we got this gem!)

"I have this really good friend. I love her to death, but she tends to overshare with me, and it's pretty uncomfortable at times. Every time she has sex, I get a text. "Just had amazing sex!" "He's soo great in bed . . . just had the best sex ever!" (Just some of the examples that come to mind.) I get one of these texts almost daily, and it really drives me nuts. I'm afraid that if I say this to her she'll think she can't tell me anything. (She tends to react dramatically.) We are really close and do share a lot, but I don't need an update everytime she gets it on. I don't know what to do!"

Do You Like Sleeping Alone or With Your Partner?

TresSugar — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 06:00:00 -0700

Attention spooners! It is now officially bad for your health to share your bed. According to British experts, when you share a bed with your partner and one of you moves in your sleep, there is a 50 percent chance that you will disturb the other person's sleep. And what happens when you don't get good sleep? Depression, heart disease, strokes, traffic accidents, lower productivity, and, perhaps, divorce!

Of course, one doctor (who sleeps in a different room than his wife) says if you sleep well together, there's no need to change. And I say - if you're used to sleeping with someone, the change might actually disturb your sleep too.

Does this news give you a welcome excuse to start sleeping in separate beds, or do you need the option to cuddle all night long?

Say What? 1960s Ad Agencies Really Were All Sex and Booze

TresSugar — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 15:00:00 -0700

"We used to have an agency 'sex' contest near the end of every year. . . . We'd go to a no-name Mexican restaurant . . . and we'd drink giant margaritas all day. . . . We'd take a blind vote to name the person at the agency you'd most want to go to bed with. We also took a vote on the person of the same sex you'd like to go to bed with. We did this for 15 years. I'd get to announce the winners each year. The first prize was a weekend at The Plaza hotel for the winning couple."

- Veteran Madison Avenue advertising executive Jerry Della Femina, 73, shared his experience working as a mad man in the 1960s. He said the characters on Mad Men would look innocent if you compared their actions to what really went down.

Do you think you could have worked in an environment like that?

Photo courtesy of AMC

DearSugar Needs Your Help: My Roommate Is Crossing the Line

DearSugar — Sat, 21 Mar 2009 09:00:00 -0700

DearSugar and Sleepless Sammy need your help. Her roommate has been extremely disrespectful and it's starting to affect her ability to get a good night's sleep. She's tried to talk with her roommate about it, but she has yet to make an effort to change. She's stuck in her lease until the end of Summer, so do you have any advice as to how she can make the best of this living satiation?

Dear Sugar,

I'm in law school and living in an apartment with another girl who I found on Craigslist. It's been about seven months now and I feel like she has absolutely no respect for me. She uses my stuff, eats my food, drinks my beer, and lets her friends crash on our couch without ever asking me. I can deal with these things; however, I recently hit my breaking point.

My roommate likes to sleep around and will have loud, porn-like sex even when I’m home. It's not that I'm a prude - she's entitled to sleep with whoever she wants - but our walls are paper thin and I can hear every bed creak, scream, and moan, and sometimes I can feel her bed shake through the wall we share. Her late night activities are wreaking havoc on my sleep pattern and I'm constantly exhausted. I’ve talked to her about it once before but nothing has changed. I’m stuck in this lease until August but I can't continue living like this. What should I do? - Sleepless Sammy

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Have You Ever Had to Live With Your Ex Post Breakup?

DearSugar — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 11:00:00 -0800

On yesterday's Oprah, Suze Orman offered up some harsh advice to those struggling financially. One couple was in such dire straights that they actually had to ask if they could afford their divorce. Suze "approved them," told them they could in fact afford it, but it got me thinking about what their lives would be like if they didn't have enough money to separate. They'd have to coexist under the same roof and sleep in the same bed, but then I realized, couples do that all the time.

I've never split up with a live-in boyfriend before so I don't know what that transition period is like, but tell me, have you ever had to stick around in the home you shared with your significant other post breakup? If so, how did it work out?

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First Class Upgrade? Swedish Hostel Sets Up in 747 Jet

CitizenSugar — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 03:00:08 -0800

Next time you jet over Stockholm, Sweden you may consider spending the night at Jumbo Hostel, an old Pan Am jumbo jet that has been converted into a hostel. Economy class beds go for $40 a night. For that price you get to share a room, flat screen TV, and luggage compartment with two other friendly ~~flyers~~ sleepers.

If you're the type of person that can never sleep on an airplane, you might want to upgrade to the more spacious cockpit, which goes for $420 a night and offers a panoramic view of the airport. As for the overall experience, a spokesperson for Jumbo Hostel told me that "the reaction from our guest have been 99.9% positive," and that the onboard atmosphere is "very tranquil."

Would you stay in this novel hostel? If you can't get on a real plane to Sweden you may be in luck - the company will expand with a franchise program starting this year. Sleeping pills and eye cover not included.

View 10 Photos ›

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You Asked: His Honesty Hurt Me

DearSugar — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 12:30:00 -0800

Dear Sugar,

My fiance and I are having some issues in the bedroom. We always agreed to be open and honest about sex since we both want to be equally satisfied, and he recently shared a fantasy with me regarding bringing another woman into bed with us. I know this is a common fantasy men have, but at this point, I don't feel comfortable going along with it. After I told him that my answer was no, he went on to talk about other things he would like me to do. While I want him to be open with me, I felt that the way he was communicating was meant to make me feel badly about myself. He kept saying, "Instead of doing what you normally do, do x, y and z." It hurt my feelings and I responded as if it did. He went on to say that I was making him feel like it wasn't OK to be honest, so am I being too sensitive, or should he have suggested his needs differently? - Shut Down Debbie

To see DearSugar's answer, read more.

Dear Shut Down Debbie,

It sounds to me like you think your husband is punishing you somehow for turning down his threesome proposal, and while I can't hear the tone is his voice, I bet he was simply being honest with you in order to make your sex life as enjoyable as possible. As we all know, the truth can hurt sometimes, especially when you feel targeted, so talk to your finance about his delivery. I'm sure it was just a coincidence that this conversation took place after your previous conversation, but if you still feel like he was being unfair, simply ask him to talk to you in a more supportive tone.

Talking about sex can be very unnerving, and it can take some trial and error before you're completely comfortable broaching the subject, but I commend you both for taking the initiative to keep the lines of communication open. Hopefully once you move past this bump in the road, you'll be able to understand how to ask for what you both want without hurting each other's feelings.

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