TresSugar

Hump Day: Is My Cold Sore Contagious?

TresSugar — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 06:00:00 -0700

Welcome to Hump Day, TrèsSugar's sex advice column! Are you confused about sex? Do you have trouble having an orgasm? Is there something you'd like to try but you're worried it's too weird? Send your questions to TrèsSugar, and our friend Dr. Charlie Glickman from Good Vibrations will offer his sound advice!

Today's Question:

“I know that cold sores are the same virus as herpes. Is it a bad idea to go down on my boy when I have one? Is it transmissible that way?” To hear what Dr. Glickman has to say, read more.

Dr. Glickman's Answer:

YES!!!

There are two types of herpes virus: HSV-1 and HSV-2. Oral herpes is usually HSV-1 and it’s estimated that 80 percent of the population has been exposed to it. Genital herpes is usually HSV-2 and it’s estimated that 25 percent of women and 12 percent of men have it. However, genital herpes can be caused by either version of the virus, so going down on someone when you have a cold sore (another name for a herpes outbreak) can spread it. To make things a bit more complicated, only about 1/3 of the people who have genital herpes are aware of it - either they’ve never had an outbreak or the outbreak was very mild. (See herpes.com for more info.)

Part of what makes herpes tricky is that it can be transmitted even when you don’t have a visible outbreak. The virus lives in your nervous system and every so often, it’ll come to the surface. It’s especially likely to happen when you’re sick or have been stressed for a while. There’s evidence that the virus starts shedding from the skin (and is therefore potentially contagious) before any visible symptoms. It’s a low risk, but it’s a possibility. To make matters worse, if the site of the shedding isn’t covered by a condom, it can be spread even when you’re practicing safer sex.

While herpes can be uncomfortable, it doesn’t represent nearly as much risk as other sexually transmissible infections (STIs) such as chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, human papilloma virus (HPV), or HIV. Having said that, there’s evidence that HSV-2 makes HIV transmission more likely. See this article for more information about how that works.

It’s also worth mentioning that I’ve seen a lot of people get really upset about STIs when they don’t get nearly as upset about any other health issue. I’ve also seen a lot of people who have all sorts of judgment about STIs but think nothing of going to work and sharing their flu germs (or worse)! STIs can be unpleasant, annoying, or life-threatening, but they don’t mean anything about the person who has them any more than chicken pox or measles do. Negative attitudes about STIs are a holdover from before we invented antibiotics and when diseases such as syphilis were seen as the wages of sin. But now we know that they’re just germs and we don’t need to shame people for having them. (Not that I’m saying that you’re doing that, but I wanted to mention it.)

The best thing that we can all do is to get tested for STIs regularly, even if you’ve never had a symptom. Lots of people have STIs and don’t know it. Check your local Planned Parenthood or other agency for information, although I recommend going with anonymous testing in order to ensure your privacy.

And safer sex is always a good choice. It’s easy to do, with a little practice. Using a lubricant can make safer sex more enjoyable since latex tends to have a bit more friction than skin. Try a silicone-based brand if you’re prone to yeast infections. Water-based brands are a bit easier to clean up since they rinse away.

If you or your partner don’t like the way condoms feel, try a different brand. The Japanese-process condoms such as Maxx and Skinless Skin are more sheer than other types. Or you could give Skyn a whirl. It’s made from polyisoprene, rather than latex, so it’s very sheer and both people will get more sensation.

Given that you have oral herpes, you might want to talk with your boyfriend about using condoms for oral sex. If you go that route, change the condom before having intercourse. That will make sure that you don’t spread the herpes virus to your vulva or vagina. It’ll also reduce the risk of your condom breaking; teeth can cause small abrasions that weaken the condom.

For an excellent, sex-positive read on safer sex, check out The Hot Guide to Safer Sex . It’s full of helpful advice and great tips.

Why Are STDs Now Called STIs?

DearSugar — Fri, 21 Mar 2008 08:00:00 -0700

I'm sure many of you were taught about STDs in your sex ed class yet you've probably noticed that I refer to them as STIs, so why the change in terms?

STD stands for sexually transmitted disease. STI stands for sexually transmitted infection. STI is a more politically correct term, since the word disease can have negative connotations or social stigmas attached. Plus, when people think of diseases, they think of something you get and have forever, but many STIs are curable, so using the term infection is actually more accurate. The term disease also implies that a person has visual symptoms, which is not always the case with STIs. Many of them such as chlamydia, gonorrhea, herpes, and HPV are asymptomatic. So for all these reasons, the term STD is gradually being replaced with STI. What do you think about the switch?

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Some Doctors Object to the Pill on Moral Grounds

TresSugar — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 12:00:00 -0700

In the very first episode of Mad Men, Peggy Olson goes to the gynecologist seeking a prescription for the pill. Watching the scene, I cringed as the doctor grills Peggy about why she would want the contraceptive pills if she were not married. He says: "As a doctor we'd like to think that putting a woman in this situation isn't going to turn her into some sort of strumpet." Although he gave her the prescription, he tells Peggy he will take her off the medicine if she "abuses" it.

If you're thinking: thank goodness I don't live in the 1960s when doctors were allowed to pass judgment on our sex lives, think again! A recent USA Today story explains how doctors are using conscience clauses to object to the pill as well as to abortion. One doctor in San Antonio told the paper that the pill would not protect her patient from the "emotional trauma from multiple partners" or sexually transmitted diseases. She said: "I could not ethically give that type of medication to a single woman." Wow. This modern doctor goes even further than the one featured on Mad Men!

The Bush administration enacted an ambitious conscience clause that says that hospitals receiving federal money cannot refuse to hire nurses or doctors who morally object to abortion or even certain forms of birth control. These regulations, which could limit access to contraception for women who rely on public clinics or those who live in rural areas, have yet to be rolled back by President Obama as promised. What do you think about doctors who withhold contraception from women because of moral objections?

Should Government Money Fund Pro-Life Pregnancy Centers?

TresSugar — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 07:00:00 -0700

Young feminists at UCLA have spent the last few months researching publicly funded crisis pregnancy centers that they claim do not inform women of all their options. Taking a cue from their pro-life counterparts who go undercover at Planned Parenthood, one woman showed up at a crisis center pretending to be pregnant. Through her research she discovered that many centers promise free pregnancy tests and options counseling, only to push their religious and ideological agenda once women come to them for help.

The young woman accused one center - which asked her for her religious affiliation right off the bat - of spreading misleading information about abortion, birth control, and sexually transmitted diseases. In addition, most of the staff were volunteers, not medically trained professionals and said that the only contraception they "get funding for" was the advice to avoid having sex all together.

Should crisis pregnancy centers that advocate abstinence, adoption, or raising a baby receive public money to support their services, or should serious abortion counseling be mandatory before a center gets funds?

China's Sex Theme Park - Vulgar or Valuable?

TresSugar — Mon, 18 May 2009 11:00:00 -0700

China's Love Land had big dreams. The sex theme park was going to offer sex technique workshops, safe-sex seminars, a museum on the history of sex, and some giant genitalia for good measure.

The owners hoped to further the spread of good sex, while stopping the spread of sexually transmitted disease. Unfortunately, the topic of sex is extremely taboo in China, so the larger-than-life naked bodies were far too much for Chinese officials to handle. Today, officials ordered the "vulgar, ill-minded and misleading" park to be demolished, before it even had a chance to open.

While Love Land would have been China's first sex theme park, exhibits exploring the cultural significance of human sexuality are not new. For example, New York's Museum of Sex offers exhibitions, lecture series, and other events on all things sex.

View 5 Photos ›

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Does Sex on TV Make You Want to Get It On?

DearSugar — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 11:02:10 -0800

Teenage pregnancy is on the rise again and researches are now saying that television is partly to blame. A study, which is being published today in the American Academy of Pediatrics looked at 700 12 to 17 year olds for three years and found that those who watched sexual content on TV were roughly twice as likely to be involved in a pregnancy over teenagers who didn't. And the lead researcher in this study, Anita Chandra, feels there's a strong association between the two factors. An article in today's Washington Post sums up the study by saying:

Studies have found a link between watching television shows with sexual content and becoming sexually active earlier, and between sexually explicit music videos and an increased risk of sexually transmitted diseases. . . . But the new research is the first to show an association between TV watching and pregnancy among teens.

Since sexual activity is basically on every channel these days, it's pretty hard to avoid, but do their findings ring true to you? When you watch sexually heated content on the small screen, does it make you want to get it on?

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The How-To Lounge: Finding the Right Birth Control for you Part 1

DearSugar — Wed, 02 May 2007 09:30:00 -0700

I receive countless questions from women inquiring about the best birth control options out on the market, and my answer is always the same-- everyone is different and some methods work better for some than others. Finding the right match can take some trial and error, so I am here to give you some information, in an ongoing series, about different methods to help you find what works best for your lifestyle.

Click here to read more

While there are methods to protect against sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy, the safest and most effective way to protect yourself is abstinence. If you are in fact sexually active, here are some options to help keep you safe.

Condoms

Condoms are the most commonly used over the counter form of birth control because they protect against disease and pregnancy and there are usually no side effects to using a condom
Condoms are only 75% effective so it is best if they are used with a sperm killing agent as well
Putting on a condom correctly is essential to effectiveness. Remember to leave a 1/2 inch of room at the tip to collect semen and be sure to roll the condom all the way down the base of the penis
If you are in a monogamous relationship and you have both been tested for sexually transmitted diseases and are interested in a more convenient method of birth control, there are many prescribed hormones and devises on the market that might be a better match for you

The Pill

The Pill is the most commonly prescribed form of birth control. The pill stops a woman's ovaries from releasing eggs during ovulation. The pill also thickens the mucus found in a woman's cervix which makes it more difficult for sperm to penetrate
The Pill is 99% effective when taken properly: at the same time everyday. Be aware that taking antibiotics and other medications can interfere with the pills effectiveness, so it is advised to use another form of birth control while you are on other medications
While the pill works well for most women, others are heavily effected by its side effects which include but are not limited to experiencing a low sex drive, nausea, moodiness, depression, breast tenderness, the possibility of blood clotting (especially if you are a smoker over the age of 35) and possible skin sensitivity to the sun
In order to get a prescription for the pill, you must see your physician to go over your heath history in order to determine what pill is right for you

The Patch

The patch is a thin plastic sticker like patch that adheres to your skin, most commonly on your stomach, buttock, arm or chest. The patch must be changed once a week for three weeks in a row
The patch has similar hormones to the pill, however many women find it more absent-minded friendly since you only need to change it once a week versus taking a pill at the same time daily
The patch is most effective when it is changed at the same time every week and adhering it to a different part of your body each time
The patch has been proven to be more effective than the pill when used correctly but can cause pregnancy if it becomes loose or falls off for more than 24 hours or if it is left on your body for more than the allotted weeks time
The patch is not recommended for women who weigh over 198 pounds

Tune in tomorrow for Finding the Right Birth Control for you Part 2!

"No Condom For the Heart." Does Abstinence Education Work?

CitizenSugar — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 16:00:34 -0700

No-nookie talk is breeding like rabbits! The New York Times magazine section this weekend got to at least second base with a great feature on virginity clubs at Ivy League schools. These "just-say no-way-until-marriage" groups, have religious members, but some are focused on the feminist part of withholding the goods. Janie Fredell, the co-president of the True Love Revolution, the Harvard group at the center of the piece said,

I am an unconventional feminist. . . . it takes a strong woman to be abstinent, and that's the sort of woman I want to be.

What struck me about the piece were the stats about abstinence education:

A 2004 report issued by Representative Henry Waxman, (D - CA) found 11 of 13 abstinence programs his government-reform committee examined were rife with scientific errors and false and misleading information about the risks of sexual activity.
A national survey found that those who took virginity pledges held on to their technical virginity about 18 months longer than teenagers who didn’t pledge, but they were six times more likely to engage in oral sex than virgins who hadn’t taken a pledge. They were also much less likely to use condoms during their first sexual experience or to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases.

And these reports are just out too:

$1.5 billion tax dollars have been spent on abstinence programs since 1982.
A new study shows that students who receive comprehensive sex education are half as likely to become teen parents as those who get none or abstinence-only sex education.

Even Grey's Anatomy actress Kate Walsh is talking abstinence, saying on CBS's Early Show on Friday that, "Abstinence only is not working. It's a $1.5 billion program over the last 10 years that has, quite frankly, failed."

Should we be saying yes to saying no? Should abstinence be taught?

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Send Condoms to Republicans, Give Money to Democrats

CitizenSugar — Sat, 30 Aug 2008 13:00:15 -0700

Planned Parenthood must think that the conventions are just big orgies. They're asking supporters to send condoms to the Republican National Convention along with money, of course, that will go to the Planned Parenthood Action Fund and Barack Obama's campaign.

Ten dollars will send one condom, $35 sends four, you get the picture. The Democrats will get the money, and they're hoping the Republicans will get the message.

OK, so the condoms aren't meant to be used (but they can . . . even for the most conventional sex), they're meant to serve as a reminder that prevention is a nonpartisan issue. Even if Planned Parenthood relays the message in its usual partisan tone, saying:

They don't get that young people need comprehensive, accurate sex education. They don't get that they don't belong in the exam room letting their politics get in the middle of a woman and her doctor. And they don't get that preventing sexually transmitted diseases starts with one simple item: a condom.

Do you think Republicans will get Planned Parenthood's message? Or are the bright-pink wrappers distracting and the message, um, plastic?

Planned Parenthood isn't the only safe-sex group cropping up at the conventions. To see who we saw last week, read more.

Trojan condoms had a tent supporting their "get it on agenda" and handed out condoms in favor of "evolving." The tent let you test your Sex IQ. Let's say there were lots of folks taking the free rubbers - all in the name of good legislation, I'm sure.

Condom Vending Machines in Jail: Hooked Up or Turned Off?

CitizenSugar — Sat, 02 Aug 2008 13:00:03 -0700

Inmates in a California prison are about to have access to free condoms as part of a controversial new pilot program that hopes to limit the spread of STDs among inmates. The prison will get 10 condom vending machines that will be stocked with 1,200 condoms a week.

The hope is that the condoms will limit the spread of sexually transmitted diseases among inmates. A spokeswoman for the Center for Health Justice says, "We know risk behavior is being reduced. We will eventually be reducing HIV infections by this measure." Gov. Schwarzenegger has twice vetoed legislation on statewide condom distribution, but agreed to conduct a one-year trial.

And no, taxpayers will not be shelling out for the rubbers (that was my first question) - a nonprofit group is paying to supply the prison with the machines and condoms, which will cost a total of $60,000.

The prison guard's union is against the plan because condoms can be a place to hide drugs and weapons - not to mention the fact that sex in prison is illegal outside of conjugal visits. Prisoners will be informed of this nooky-is-against-the-law fact when they're told where the machines are.

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