TresSugar

Watch Out For Fraud When Trying to Score a Date Online

Kristy Korcz — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 11:12:16 PST

There are lots of ways to find your geeky love match online, but as they say on The Bachelor, not all online daters are there for the right reasons. According to a new report, online dating fraud rose 150 percent in 2011, making Internet dating sites a hotbed for fraudulent links and phishing scams.

With over three percent of interactions being of fraudulent nature - including those misrepresenting themselves to get personal information via links or spamming - how are you supposed to tell who is genuine and who isn't? I mean, you're there to meet new people, right? Some red flags to consider are the use of the word "love" early on in correspondence, someone urging you to take messaging off-site to email or Facebook (where hackers have easier access to your personal information), and weird syntax and language discrepancies. Basically, if their message sounds like one you might find in your spam folder, keep your guard up.

Of course, the only way you'll really be able to tell if someone is really into you, or if you're flirting with disaster, is to trust your gut instincts. If something doesn't feel right, it probably isn't.

Tips For Building an Effective Online Dating Profile

Kristy Korcz — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 08:02:33 PST

In this digital age, men and women aren't just hitting bars and coffee shops to snag a date. More and more, they're heading to the Internet. In fact, 50 percent of men have met a woman online according to a recent survey. It's obvious that online dating has become the norm, and for good reason - the Internet gives you more options because you can cover a wider area of partner possibilities (as in, the entire globe). And while your chances are better of finding a compatible mate on the worldwide web than, say, your small town of 13,000 people, the Internet can't help you if you don't give off the right signals. First impressions are everything - even virtual ones. Beef up your online dating profile with these tips, and snag yourself one of those "many fish" your mother is always talking about.

Make sure you're fishing in the right pool -You wouldn't go to Craigslist's Casual Encounters to look for a serious relationship, so don't go to Match.com if you're just looking for a little fun on a Friday night. Sites like eHarmony and Chemistry have had a lot of success by getting scientific about the dating process (taking your likes and dislikes and matching you up with someone who's compatible), so make sure you're ready to commit before diving in!
Lose the negativity - No one wants to meet up with a Debbie Downer, so if your online dating profile is riddled with sarcasm, negativity, and pessimism, you can be sure that you won't be getting many date requests any time soon. This doesn't mean you have to be fake, just keep the "I'm too cool for school" attitude to a minimum.

See a few more tips, including some important dos and don'ts for your profile photos, when you read more

4 Places to Find Your Valentine Online

Kristy Korcz — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 05:01:05 PST

Valentine's Day is fast approaching, and you haven't secured a companion for the evening. No sweat! There are plenty of websites that will help you find a crush-worthy date to accompany you to your dinner for two; all you have to do is have a great online profile and an open mind. Of course, you could always hit the town with your best girls instead (which may be a lot less stressful), but least you have options. Check out four sites that will do the trick in a jiffy.

Why You Should Take Your Chances When Online Dating

YourTango — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 04:00:21 PST

We're happy to present this excerpt from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

I'd like a large pie with extra cheese, mushrooms, sausage, and broccoli. But make sure the cheese is covering the whole pizza because I don't like baldness, and actually, why don't you hold the sausage? I'd like someone who doesn't eat processed meat.

And while you're there, make sure those mushrooms are well-educated, like maybe with a master's or PhD, and as for the broccoli, can you make sure it's a certain height because I only want it if it's tall. Could I get that to go? Thanks.

Someone recently told me that online dating was like ordering a pizza. At first I laughed at that analogy, then I cringed, and then I realized that he was right. We are all looking for that on-paper perfect mate, and since online dating sites give so much choice in the matter, we think it's our right to have everything we're looking for.

Now, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with wanting certain things - I did - but what if someone out there looks good but doesn't necessarily fit all of those objective criteria. What's a single to do? I'd venture to say - try 'em out anyway.

When we walk into a bar and see someone we like, that guy or girl doesn't have a chart attached to his or her forehead full of credentials, stats, and dislikes. (Wouldn't that be a pretty funny sight?!) We trust our instincts; we go with chemistry.

But online, we have so much information that it's almost too easy to discard someone simply because he is only 5'5 or she has a fondness for US Weekly rather than the latest issue of The Economist. (I'm not saying I know anyone like that . . .)

Finish reading the rest of the story on YourTango: Why You Should Take Your Chances When Online Dating

Written by Erika Ettin for YourTango.

Group Therapy: Should I Start Online Dating?

Tres Community — Sat, 17 Dec 2011 03:05:09 PST

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

I've been divorced for over a year, separated for a year before that. I think I'm ready to get out there and start dating. Unfortunately, because I have a full-time job and very active children, I'm never in a position to meet a man the "old fashioned" way. Thus, I'm considering trying the whole online thing. I'm nervous though, so I'm wondering . . . do you think it's a good idea? Which sites are the best? Should I pay or try the free option? Any personal experiences? Thanks!

Have a dilemma of your own? Post it anonymously to Group Therapy for advice, and check out what else is happening in the TrèsSugar Community.

Group Therapy: Worried About My Friend's Online Relationship

Tres Community — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 03:05:17 PST

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

A lesbian friend of mine met a girl online about 2 weeks ago, and the two of them are both quite taken with each other. I think that maybe something serious could come of it, the only problem for them is distance. My friend wants to plan a trip to head down south to see her new online flame to meet up in person and see if they really are made for each other.

I'm stoked she found someone that she feels this way about, but am a little concerned. My concern is that my friend is 20 and her unofficial online girlfriend is 18. Additionally, they are both currently living at home and come from families who wouldn't approve of the trip. My friend wants to leave in July and is going to have to pay for everything because her girlfriend's parents will not allow her to travel, or allow my friend to stay at their place. So, in addition to the cost of the flight, my friend is also going to have to pay for her own hotel expenses for the entire week.

I want my friend to be happy and I'll even help her plan this trip, but at the same time I'm worried that this might be too serious, too soon. It's a lot of money to spend on someone she just met online and I'm at a loss for what to do. How can I tell her I'm concerned without being the bad guy? I definitely don't want to throw all this negative stuff at her . . . should I just leave it be?

Have a dilemma of your own? Post it anonymously to Group Therapy for advice, and check out what else is happening in the TrèsSugar Community.

Online Dating: A Way to Score Free Food?

Annie Scudder — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 12:20:26 PST

Times are tough and living in a city like NYC isn't cheap. Instead of cutting back on nice restaurants, some Manhattanites turn to dating sites to find men who will pick up the check. One of these women has come forward. She told Business Insider she subsidizes her $45,000 salary with free dinners she gets from chivalrous men she meets on Match.com. The 23-year-old claims her busy dating schedule brings in $1,200 a month in free food and drinks.

The story from this anonymous free rider isn't the first time I've heard of women taking advantage of a free dinner date. I've known acquaintances who have used this thinking to justify online dating in the first place, telling themselves, "What's the worst that can happen? A free dinner?" Of course, there's a clear line between going out with numerous men a week with no intention of finding a romantic connection, and seeing a nice meal as a perk of online dating. Perhaps it's time to go dutch on the first date, as a precaution.

Hot Guys Are Better Writers, At Least Of Online Dating Profiles

YourTango — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 04:00:25 PST

We're happy to present this excerpt from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

On dating websites, users choose their profile pictures based on their best features; they highlight what they'd most like potential love interests to notice.

Rock solid abs? Go ahead, snap a "Situation"-esque shot with your six-pack showing. Striking blue eyes? Stare right into that webcam and pout away, baby. Plus, if you're insecure about another part of your body (let's say your lack of six-pack), you don't need to show it.

A new study, however, found that the real meat and potatoes of a person's online dating profile - you know, the actual content - is just as effective at conveying attractiveness as their picture. So, if you're hiding a flaw with your photo, online daters can still gauge how good-looking you are based on your "about me" section.

Researchers from Villanova University asked females to rate the profiles and pictures of 100 men, aged 22 to 25, who used a popular dating website. The women first rated how good-looking they found a group of men based on their snapshots. They also rated their confidence and masculinity, as determined from the picture. Next, women were given written (another group's) profiles, without the pic, and asked how attractive each was, based on how confident, kind, intelligent and funny each man seemed.

The results showed that men who were deemed more physically attractive also wrote the most appealing profiles. Researchers believe that guys who are confident in their appearance can also convey that confidence in their written profiles. Some guys have all the luck, I guess.

To read the rest of the story, check out YourTango: Hot Guys Are Better Writers, At Least Of Online Dating Profiles

Written by Kait Smith for YourTango.

Group Therapy: My Boyfriend Is Still on Online Dating Sites

Tres Community — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 03:05:11 PST

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

I just found out that my bf is actually into online dating such as Zoosk, Getiton, and other dating sites online. Please advise what to do - should I panic or tell him that I found out all this because unfortunately he forgot to close his email and I was able to read it all there. We've been together for three years - and a long distance relationship. I have confronted him about this before but he said he was already a member in this before we met. And I told him to deactivate all these sites, but still he's on. And he told me it was just nothing so we don't have to talk about it it's just all teasing especially he is working in Afghanistan and it's really hard to live a life there. He said he loves me and doesn't want anybody else. Basically I just have to ignore all this. I've tried, but sometimes I can't stop thinking of it. Please advise what should I tell him. I want all this to stop.

Have a dilemma of your own? Post it anonymously to Group Therapy for advice, and check out what else is happening in the TrèsSugar Community.

Link Time - How I Fell For an Online Romance Scam

TresSugar — Thu, 29 Sep 2011 12:50:00 PDT

Perfect stranger: "How I fell victim to online romance fraud" - Huffington Post
Cougarship could cost you your life: scary stats on marrying cubs - The Daily Beast
Watch this adorable Disney flashmob proposal video! - theBERRY
The Little Mermaid and other kid movies that should come back in 3D - College Candy
The worst celebrity excuses for cheating - Yahoo! Shine
Meet a real single bride who married herself - The Frisky
Do you research potential dates before meeting them? - Glamour
What is a "booty tooch"? Tyra Banks explains - BuzzSugar
A dress made out of nipples? It's real! - Gawker