TresSugar

Handle This: Your Luggage Gets Lost

DearSugar — Thu, 06 Nov 2008 08:00:00 -0800

You've been with your boyfriend for six months and he's finally ready to introduce you to his family, who live across the country. You know how important this trip is, which is why your nerves have been running wild all week. From the way he's always described his mother, she seems overcritical and very materialistic - the complete opposite of you. In an effort to make a good first impression, you packed all of your favorite outfits, including matching handbags, shoes, and accessories - you feel completely prepared!

After landing, you head straight to baggage claim. Your boyfriend's bag comes off the conveyor belt, but yours is nowhere in sight. You panic and when the bags stop coming, you're forced to accept the fact that your suitcase is missing. You're stuck with the clothes on your back for the next four days, and all you can think of is his mother's reaction. How would you handle this?

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People Are Not Always How They Appear

DearSugar — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 12:00:00 -0700

Back when I was in high school, I took a leadership class, and though the subject matter was somewhat indefinable, it may have been one of the more valuable classes I had because it taught me life skills like communication and working with other people. In fact, one assignment still lingers with me today. We were asked to share with our classmates what our first impression of them had been and then fill in the following statement:

People usually assume that I ______ but what they'd be surprised to know about me is ______.

It was fascinating to find out how misperceived everyone was. Since I know that this is applicable at any age and point in life, try filling in the blanks yourselves. Tell me: What do people assume about you? But what are you really?

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The How-To Lounge: Leaving a Lasting Impression

DearSugar — Thu, 31 Jul 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Leaving a lasting impression will not only help your name come to mind in the work place, it'll also up the odds that the cute gent you met will search everywhere for your number the next morning. Since I know there are a few of you out there who'd rather fade into the background than stand out in the crowd, I have a few ideas for how to leave an impression without making a fuss. To see my ideas just read more.

Obviously, if you're looking to make an impression, you want it to be a good one so set the tone by having a positive attitude. If you have positive energy, others will not only be drawn to you, but they'll pick up on that vibe and liken it to your face and name.
Try to make a statement in either your personality, opinion, or dress. Don't worry; I'm not suggesting that you drape a feather boa over your shoulders every time you meet someone new, but there's something to be said for someone who dresses the role that they're trying to convey. Just be yourself - you're unique and that alone will make you stand out.
Do what it takes to be an active participant in whatever is going on around you. It's important to be able to join a conversation and respond to others.
Just because you're joining in a conversation, it doesn't mean that you should try to dominate it. In fact, it's not a bad strategy to use an opening question to give other people the opportunity to talk. Oddly, I've noticed that people tend to associate positive thoughts and memories with people who listen to them.
On your way out, make sure to give goodbyes to everyone. Think of it as a way to give them a last reminder of who you are. You'd be surprised by how such a simple thing can make a big difference.

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Dear Poll: Do You Make a Good First Impression?

DearSugar — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 14:00:00 -0700

Being able to make a good first impression is a gift in all aspects of life, from career to romance. Some people are just born with the ability; their personality oozes good vibes and it takes them no time to make a friend, get hired, or join a new social activity. The rest of us have to make it up - this is where faking confidence comes in handy - or succumb to a mediocre (or bad) impression. While I always strive for the former, I understand how difficult making a worthwhile first impression can be, so ladies let me ask you, is your first impression usually a good one?

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Would You Give Him A Chance?

DearSugar — Tue, 20 May 2008 08:00:00 -0700

I've asked you before if you'd ever compete for a man, but what about dating a man that's competed for a woman? If you missed last nights premiere of The Bachelorette, 25 guys had to put their best foot forward and make their very best first impression. Some of them tried a little too hard and ended up making fools out of themselves, while others simply put their heart on their sleeves, all trying to meet their future wife. Since 85 percent of you thought the contestants on The Bachelor were pathetic and desperate, would you automaticly disregard a man that was once a contestant on The Bachelorette for the same reasons or would you give him a chance to win you over?

This or That: He Thinks You're Not Too Smart or Not So Pretty?

DearSugar — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 16:00:00 -0700

Out to dinner and drinks with friends, you meet a group of guys that seem really cool. They chat you up at your table for a bit, and you find yourself flirting with one in particular. They head back to the restaurant bar and you and your girlfriends finish your meal. You get up to use the restroom and decide to pass behind them on your way, only to catch the one you had your eye on talking about you with his friends. Would it be worse if you overheard him say that . . .

This: You're really beautiful but don’t seem to have much to say? He may like to look at you, but now you know he won’t be flirting with you because he’s interested in your personality.

Or . . .

That: He thinks you're amazing to talk to, but as far as looks go, you’re just not doing it for him? You know you’re probably just not his type appearance-wise, but still, it hurts.

Which is worse?

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Do You Use Flattery to Break the Ice?

DearSugar — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 10:00:00 -0700

A few months ago I asked you all if you return a compliment when given one, and 71 percent of you said no. I also mentioned that flattering someone is a nice thing to do when breaking the ice, but now I want to pose a similar question in a different way: Do you ever compliment someone just to appease them, almost out of nervousness? Some of us do it as second nature because we know it feels good when people do it to us, but others aren't as forthcoming with accolades, especially to other women. So ladies, what I want to know is, do you offer up compliments as a way of breaking the ice, or do you leave that job to others?

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Do Tell: Do You Go in For the Hug or the Handshake?

DearSugar — Tue, 22 Apr 2008 12:00:00 -0700

A good friend told me about an awkward encounter she had the other day when being introduced to a friend of a friend. Upon their introduction, my friend stuck out her hand for a friendly shake while the stranger went in for an even friendlier hug! She ended up jabbing her hand into the other girl’s abdomen, while simultaneously giving her a side hug. Not only was she embarrassed, but she also couldn’t understand why a girl she didn’t even know would need to hug her on the first meet.

I know the importance of a first introduction, and I've had my fair share of awkward encounters, but I rarely go in for the hug. So ladies, when it comes to introductions, do tell, do you go in for the hug or stick with the safe shake?

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The How-To Lounge: Introducing People

DearSugar — Thu, 20 Sep 2007 09:00:00 -0700

An introduction can be incredibly important whether it's at a dinner party or at a business event, so here are some tips on how to introduce someone properly.

Click here to read more

Always introduce someone using their first and last name
Always introduce both parties. For example, Ali, this is Kim, Kim, this is Ali
Always introduce equally. Never say what one person does or who one person is friends with without doing the same for the other party. Knowing the person's relevance is very important when meeting someone for the first time
If you are meeting someone professionally, remember to exchange business cards - you never know when it might come in handy
You never have a second chance to make a first impression, so when you're being introduced to someone, smile and shake their hand firmly
If you are the connection between two groups of people, it's your job to make sure everyone has met each other, so even if you have introduced two people before, some aren't as good at remembering name as others, so refresh their memory - for example, Ali, you remember Kim!

I hope these tips help and as always, if you have anything you would like to add, please share in the comments below.

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Dear Poll: Who do you Check out More?

DearSugar — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 13:00:00 -0700

In a previous poll, 51% of you said you dress for other women rather than men. So since it's pretty clear that you are dressed to impress for the same sex, who do you find yourself checking out more often when you're out to dinner, or walking down the street, shopping or at a bar -- men or women? Do you tend to look at other women to size up your competition first, or do you pay more attention to potential eligible bachelors?

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