TresSugar

Love It or Leave It: The Little Pink Card

DearSugar — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 10:00:00 -0800

I just came across this handy dandy tool that could make life a whole lot easier for the men out there! It's called The Little Pink Card, and it's a one-stop place for women to jot down important dates (anniversary and birthday) and her likes (favorite flower, designer, store, candy, etc.) so the man in her life knows exactly what to buy her, and when. It's designed to fit right inside his wallet for easy access! So what do you think - do you love this pretty cheat-sheet, or would you leave it?

Where Do You Stand: Scheduled Sex Dates

DearSugar — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 12:00:00 -0700

We're all busy people. Many of us work or go to school full time. We take care of our dogs, our homes, or our children. We spend time at the gym, with our friends and family, and we run around doing errands on the weekends. The stress and busyness of everyday life can unfortunately take away time spent with our significant others, forcing couples to pencil each other in for special dates and intimacy.

Sometimes having a scheduled sex date is exciting, knowing all day that you have a hot date planned after work, then other times it can feel forced. So ladies, where do you stand on scheduled sex dates? Do you think it's important to set aside times for this kind of intimacy if you're too busy for it to come naturally? Or is sex better when it's spontaneous and unplanned?

Source

Group Therapy: An innocent lunch date.

Thu, 23 Aug 2007 03:00:00 -0700

I've just come back from lunch - with another man. I have a boyfriend in another town and this other man knows about him as well. For some reason I am feeling a bit guilty. I should probably tell my boyfriend but I feel that my whole life doesn't always have to revolve around him and that I am entitled to have friends of the opposite sex. I can assure you that it was just a platonic date. All done at the spur of the moment because he was have a horrible day so he asked me out for a bite.

I can't help but feel guilty about it. We even spoke about mye bf and he didnt' seem jealous at all. So strange. Funny enough, I have no inch of attraction to the other man, not a single tiny inch. I still feel guilty which is so silly, right?

[EDITOR'S NOTE: To be involved in more GROUP THERAPY, click here]

Do You Like to Double Date?

TresSugar — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 11:00:00 -0700

Last night's How I Met Your Mother was all about double dates and the couples who love them - and the couples who hate them.

In the episode, married couple Marshall and Lilly get so excited that their friends Barney and Robin are together because finally have another couple in their group of friends.

Unfortunately, Marshall and Lilly's previous attempts at double dating haven't gone too well. The eager pair comes on really strong and ends up scaring couples away. The same thing happens when they invite longtime friends Barney and Robin over for a couples night of cheese, charades, and margaritas. While they're enjoyable under normal circumstances, the fact that it's an official double date turns Marshall and Lilly into an overbearing and annoying duo. Barney and Robin have an awful time and end up trying to avoid any future double dates!

When you're in a relationship, do you avoid the classic double date, or are you eager to hang out with other couples?

Photo courtesy of CBS

Edward vs. Jacob: Which Guy Is More Your Type?

TresSugar — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 07:46:39 -0800

You don't need to be a fan of Twilight to understand the difference between the two leading men (can we call vampires and werewolves men?). On the one hand, there's Edward - think of him as the sophisticated older man type. In fact, he's 108. If you go for introverted, devoted, and beautiful men, Edward's your type of guy. Then we have Jacob, the good-natured hunk. Jacob's the extrovert with a sense of humor who knows how to have fun. Which type of guy would you rather date: the mysterious guy or the outgoing guy?

Tech Dating 101: Using Your Phone While on a Date

DearSugar — Mon, 13 Apr 2009 11:42:02 -0700

Sometimes we all need a little help navigating the choppy waters of dating when tech gets tossed into the mix, which is why geeksugar and I have teamed up for another installment of Tech Dating 101. Last week, we talked about canceling a date via text, and this week we're discussing whether or not texting and making calls during your date is acceptable dinner etiquette.

Can I text and make phone calls during a date without being rude?

To see DearSugar's answer, read more.

I'll make this one simple. Using your phone while you're on a date is rude - period. A date should be about you and the person you're with, trying to get to know one another, enjoying your time together, and most importantly, not worrying about what your friends are doing or who is trying to get in touch with you.

If you're on a date with your long-term boyfriend or your husband, my opinion is a little different, especially if you have kids. While I think having chats at the dinner table is still impolite, I do think checking to see who is calling or reading a text is acceptable if you're trying to make plans with other couples or if you're calling to check in with the babysitter, but taking it any further is still a no-no in my book.

However, if you're on a blind date and you think there's a chance you'll need to make a quick escape, by all means keep that phone on the table for your "emergency call" from your best friend!

To see what my girl geek has to say, be sure to click here!

Source

Ask a Party Planner: Should I Date Outside My Religion?

TresSugar — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 04:00:00 -0700

Conventional Wisdom is a different kind of advice column. Your questions will be answered by people from all walks of life rather than by advice experts. If you have a question you'd like answered on Conventional Wisdom, you can submit it here.

This week, a party planner offers advice to a woman unsure about a new love interest. After you read her answer, be sure to check out our Group Therapy group where I found this question.

Today's Question:

I'm a single 32-year-old woman and I am under immense pressure to get married from my family and community. I have been single for two years since my last relationship, and four months ago I met this guy and started dating him. We quickly got close and we really care for each other. He wants me to be his girlfriend now, however there a few issues with us - he is only 28 and from another religion. If this goes anywhere, then we are sure to face opposition from both our families. We are from cultures where our families mean a lot to us.

We have talked about this being a long-term relationship, but we have yet to figure out if we will end up married since it's obviously too early. I'm wondering if I should date other guys while we figure this out. I really don't want to, but my friends warn me to not put all my eggs in one basket, especially when he is four years younger than me. I also worry that our religions will come between us in the future.

What should I do? Date other guys, or be his girlfriend and see this through?

Signed, Unsure

To see the party planner's answer, read more.

Dear Unsure,

It seems like there are two issues here: first, his age, and second, your religions. Let's discuss.

I think you should not worry about his age. Twenty-eight is old enough to be in a serious, committed relationship if that's what he wants. Like you said, it's early in the relationship, so you can't predict whether you two are going to get married. But there is only one way to find out - by dating him exclusively.

As for the religion issue: this is something to seriously consider. But I think you need to figure out if you're willing to date someone with a different background - is it worth it to you, not your family, to work through the inevitable obstacles (like choosing how to celebrate holidays, or how to raise kids)? As for your family, I think that they will be more supportive than you think. If you're happy, they should be happy for you too. And you say this guy really values his family, so I think it's great that you found someone who thinks his family is important - just like you do.

If you really like this guy, it's worth giving it a chance. Good luck.

Signed,
A party planner

Flashback: Young Steve Martin Wins The Dating Game

TresSugar — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 06:00:00 -0700

I caught the end of Shopgirl the other night and watched it with one eye open, preparing to wince while old Steve Martin hits on 20-something Claire Danes. But in 1968, the brown-haired and side-burned Martin wasn't only a college student, he was best known as bachelor #2 on The Dating Game.

UK Report Calls Date-Rape Drug a Myth

TresSugar — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 14:00:00 -0700

Well this is depressing. A UK Daily Mail article titled Date-Rape Drug? No Dear, You Just Had Too Much to Drink claims that date-rape drugs are mostly an urban myth. The paper quotes academic research, recently published in the British Journal of Criminology, to argue that women are "willing to 'hide behind' the idea that a stranger poured poison in their drink - rather than face up to the fact that they had simply been binge drinking."

The original report claims that women often confuse binge-drinking induced blackouts and dizziness with drink-spiking, and researchers worry that this could cause women to be less careful about more common factors that put them at risk for rape - like heavy drinking. Unfortunately, this attitude suggests that because women are responsible for their binge drinking, they're also responsible for any assault they might endure. (What about the rapist?)

In addition, the authors say that "despite popular beliefs, police have found no evidence rape victims are commonly drugged with substances such as rohypnol." It seems like quite a leap to say that women getting drugged and then raped is an urban myth just because it might not be as common as a drunk woman getting raped.

It's troubling that some experts and the media cannot find a way to remind people about the dangers associated with binge drinking without discrediting women who have been victims of sexual abuse.

Coasters That Detect Date-Rape Drugs in Drinks

TresSugar — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 04:00:00 -0700

Getting reminders that there are predatory men out there willing to spike your drink with date-rape drugs kinda keeps me from ever wanting to leave my apartment again, but at least for the brave bar flies out there, there are now coasters that can be used to detect two "popular" date-rape drugs, GHB (aka "Roofies") and ketamine.

Some bars are willing to fork over the 40 cents-per-coaster to hand these out to women so that they feel safe enough to drink at their bars. It's pretty shocking that this is common enough that a whole industry has been built around it. In case you didn't know, there's also the lip gloss that detects date-rape drugs. Sigh. To watch a news clip about a reserve law enforcement officer who was busted by a bartender using one of these coasters, read more.