TresSugar

How Do You Feel About Having Children?

TresSugar — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 04:00:00 -0700

Maureen Dowd asks why women seem unhappier today than ever in her New York Times column over the weekend. Are they unhappier? Women today seem way happier than the defeated and bitter Betty Draper on Mad Men. But the General Social Survey, which has tracked Americans’ moods since 1972, along with five other major studies, show women have become more dissatisfied while men are becoming happier. (Black women, interestingly, are a little happier since 1972, but still not as happy as black men.)

The number of distractions we have today correlated with women's rising unhappiness. The biggest distraction? Children. “Across the happiness data, the one thing in life that will make you less happy is having children,” Betsey Stevenson, professor and coauthor of a paper called “The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness" told Dowd. “It’s true whether you’re wealthy or poor, if you have kids late or kids early."

Stevenson concedes she doesn't know one mother who said she wished she never had kids, but knowing kids aren't all bundles of joy could make you feel more confident should you decide to opt out. How do you feel about having children?

Source: Flickr User Naso3

Kids Are Blind to the Notion of a Colorblind Society

TresSugar — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 10:00:00 -0700

Well-intentioned parents who want their kids to grow up in a colorblind world avoid discussing race. But a new study involving white families reveals that when parents keep quiet about skin color, young children will discriminate based on race.

The findings from the Children's Research Lab at the University of Texas are featured in this week's Newsweek. Here's an example of how researchers gauge the children's attitudes about race:

Asked how many white people are mean, these children commonly answered, "Almost none." Asked how many blacks are mean, many answered, "Some," or "A lot." Even kids who attended diverse schools answered the questions this way.

The researchers then asked parents to discuss interracial friendship with their children every night for a week straight. When the kids came back to be questioned again, almost none of the opinions changed. Only six of the children dramatically improved their racial attitudes. What was it about these children? The researchers found that every family, except for these six, avoided talking explicitly about race. Instead, they sent their kids the vague message that "everybody is equal." To find out why parents tended to be so vague, read more.

The study suggested that parents are reluctant to discuss race because they worry that such an education passes on society's tendency to classify people based on the color of their skin. But it seems that even if an adult never mentions race, kids can be prone to favor people who look similar to themselves. Thus, staying silent about skin color might not be the best way to go.

Do you think it's possible to move toward a "colorblind" society, or will we always have to deal with openly with race?

Awkward! A Stranger's Child Won't Stop Screaming

TresSugar — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 13:00:00 -0700

We've all been there - on a plane, at the store, trying to watch a movie, and the screeching, wailing or whining begins. I always feel for the parents of children who, in public, are causing a big ruckus. It's annoying enough, I imagine, but then having strangers either glare or silently seethe must be tough. You'd probably either never want to leave the house again or you'd become militant about your rights as a parent to be out and about, annoyed strangers be damned! (Check out the hilarious video above and watch until the end - she admits the kid, though annoying, is cute!)

One crazy old dude took matters into his own hands on Monday by slapping a stranger's crying toddler at Walmart. Uh, wow. Hopefully, most of us are not cruel (or crazy) enough to do something like this, but how do you handle a situation when a baby, toddler or child is making a fuss? The child's age and the parent's reaction probably make a huge difference.

Sunday Confessional: He Wants Kids, She Doesn't

TresSugar — Sun, 02 Aug 2009 03:00:00 -0700

We're scouring the juicy (but anonymous!) secrets posted on Truu Confessions and letting you weigh in. This week a confessor tells us that she doesn't want kids, but her partner does.

"I think we are a complete family already - just the two of us. Doesn't he know a baby will just mess up our great life together? And aren't husbands supposed to be the ones who DON'T want a baby?!"

Do you think this is a big deal?

Richard Dawkins Funds Atheist Camp For Kids

TresSugar — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 12:00:00 -0700

Famous atheist Richard Dawkins has put his money behind a Summer camp for kids - you can think of it as the anti-Jesus Camp.

At atheist Camp Quest, kids aged 8-17 learn about rational skepticism, moral philosophy, ethics, and evolution - while enjoying traditional camp activities. According to those involved, the project is not about changing what kids think, but about changing the way they think.

Do you think kids should be able to go to camp and just have fun, or is it valuable to include an emphasis on religious or ideological values?

Front Page: 13-Year-Old Kavya Is an American Spelling Idol

TresSugar — Fri, 29 May 2009 08:01:09 -0700

Kavya Shivashankar won the national spelling bee yesterday by spelling "laodicean." - CBS News
Former president George W. Bush has weighed in on the torture issue for the first time, calling the interrogation methods effective. - CNN
Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi, 72, is denying that he had an affair with an 18-year-old model. - The Independent
Susan Boyle was so distraught over recent negative publicity about her expletive-filled rant that she almost quit Britain's Got Talent before the finals. - BBC News
Tonight Jay Leno will host his last Tonight Show. - Reuters

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Should Young Kids Be Taught About the Risk of HIV/AIDS?

TresSugar — Wed, 20 May 2009 11:00:00 -0700

Elton John's AIDS Foundation spreads the message of AIDS prevention with the hope of stopping the spread of the disease. In a new interview with CNN, Elton says that the US has something to learn from Africa when it comes to preventative education. If schools systematically taught American kids about the risk of HIV at a young age, a majority of citizens would know how to protect themselves by the time they became sexually active. Elton explains:

"We find that if we could get into the schools at a grass-roots levels, which we do in places like Africa where we get to kids at a young age and we tell them about preventive measures for not getting HIV, we find the success rate is tremendous."

Not everyone supports AIDS education in schools, however. Some believe it should be up to parents to teach children about sex or that the subject matter is inappropriate for innocent youth. What do you think?

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Dear Poll: Do Fairy Tales Send a Bad Message?

DearSugar — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 06:00:00 -0700

The View was filmed at The Walt Disney Studios in LA this week, and every morning, a different Disney character escorted the ladies on stage. This of course sparked conversations and nostalgic memories about the women's favorite fairy tales from childhood, but it also brought up some food for thought. Though the stories of Bambi, Pinocchio, and Cinderella are all moral tales, their lessons can be both sad and scary, and they also have the ability to send the wrong message to kids - as we all know, not every tale ends in happily ever after.

I loved watching these movies as a kid, and I look forward to sharing that experience with my kids one day, but tell me, do you think fairy tales such as these send a bad message to kids?

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Group Therapy: I Just Found Out I Might Not Be Able to Have Children

Tue, 10 Mar 2009 04:00:00 -0700

I recently found out some disturbing news from my gyno. I apparently have a condition where I do not ovulate and my body has not responded to treatment. I have always dreamed of having a family so this news is obviously devastating. There is still a possibility that I could have children with expensive fertility treatments, but truthfully I'm not sure how I feel about taking such extreme measures.

So my question to you is whether or not I have an obligation to tell my boyfriend about this. He and I have only been together a couple of months and have not yet discussed marriage or children. I think it's too soon to have a discussion like that with him (we haven't even said "I love you"), but I feel like my condition is a deal-breaker for some men. I feel guilty keeping this knowledge to myself, but I don't want to throw a wrench in our relationship that is just beginning to blossom. Any advice?

[EDITOR'S NOTE: To read more GROUP THERAPY, click here or submit your own question here.]

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Federal Court Rules: Sex Bad, Violence OK

CitizenSugar — Sun, 22 Feb 2009 08:00:05 -0800

California's ban on selling violent video games to minors is unconstitutional, according to a US federal appeals court. Before you libertarians start jumping for joy, take a look at the decision. The court maintained Friday that there is one type of content that can be banned as obscenity - sexual content.

Justifying the ban, the state argued that video games cause psychological harm to minors and should be banned like sexual content. But the court said the research was inconclusive and that video games "are a form of expression protected by the First Amendment . . .The government may not restrict speech in order to control a minor's thoughts." The opinion also said that "the Supreme Court has carefully limited obscenity to sexual content."

So, the US Constitution protects violence, but not sex? I wonder what the forefathers would say about those priorities.

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