TresSugar

Good Idea or Bad Idea: Merging Your Bank Accounts

DearSugar — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 11:00:00 -0700

After you've said "I do," it's time to start your life as husband and wife. Even though being a newlywed is no doubt exciting, there are still a lot of decisions to make, and what to do with your money should be pretty high on that list. Since times have changed since our parents got married, merging your bank accounts is no longer the obvious choice when it comes to financial planning. When you factor in duel incomes, prenups, and a high divorce rate into the equation, couples have to protect themselves and their money. Some couples choose to open one joint account and keep another one separate, others keep all their money completely independent of each others. There are those that believe what's mine is yours and merge everything. But is that a good idea? I've yet to experience this so tell me, is pooling all your money after getting married a good or bad idea?

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After You're Married, Do You Join Your Money?

DearSugar — Mon, 14 Jan 2008 16:00:00 -0800

When you get married, it can feel so amazing to be in love and start your two-person family; but, it can also bring up a lot of questions, especially about money. In my parents' generation, it was just assumed that your finances would be combined, but things are a little different now. Since so many relationships are, unfortunately, ending in divorce, people want to have separate accounts (and sometimes sign a prenup) so they're protected - just in case. Another, more positive, reason that people aren't joining accounts is because women have a more equal role when it comes to salaries, so they aren't as reliant on their husbands income.

So what do you think? After you say "I do," do you feel comfortable pooling all your money together, with the idea that "What's mine is yours, and what's yours is mine?" Or do you think it's best to keep separate bank accounts?

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How Do I Handle This Strip Club Situation?

Tres Community — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 06:00:15 -0800

This post comes from Group Therapy in our TrèsSugar Community. Feel free to add your advice in the comments!

First of all my husband and I have been married for half of a year now. He's in the Navy and just got deployed, but right before the deployment he was sent to Hawaii for one day. I dropped him off at the airport and it was so hard for me to let him go. He called from Hawaii and we talked for five minutes then he said he had to go and he would call back.

As I was checking our bank account to check on the bills I noticed he had paid to go in to some type of club. While crying my eyes out because of how much I already missed him and knowing he wasn't coming home any time soon, I waited for him to call back. When he finally did I got him to tell me the truth and it turned out to be a strip club. This was his first time going into a strip club. The problem is that I feel so offended and disrespected. I know I'm not unattractive, and I'm very open minded in our sex life. So to me it seems as if I'm not enough for him, and that he didn't care about how I feel about strip clubs. The fact that he was lusting over those girls makes me so angry and upset.

To see the rest, .

When we talked I was so mad and disappointed and couldn't stop crying. But after a while I realized that I've been told not to say anything negative or upsetting to him since he was going on deployment to a very stressful environment. I won't be able to talk to him at all while he's gone, I can only send emails but I can't confront him there either. So I had to pretend that I got over it and that I was OK, so he wouldn't feel bad and guilty. But in reality I feel so disgusted and can't take the thought of him wanting someone else. I'm alone and don't have any family here, this is our first deployment and I'm still trying to handle it. He made things so much worse for me, now I'm not just worried about his safety, but also at the thought of when he goes to a port he's going to cheat on me. I'm just hurt and feel resentment towards him, but for as long as he's out I have to pretend I'm fine and support him through the emails. I know some people might think I'm over reacting, but to me this is just like cheating.

There's lots of great stuff going on in our community - join it, check it out, share your posts or advice in the great groups and maybe we'll feature it here on TrèsSugar!

Matchmakers Make Money as Singles Budget For Love

TresSugar — Thu, 16 Apr 2009 04:00:00 -0700

What can't you attribute to the recession these days? Teens blame the economy for their bad behavior (it's recession anxiety!), and at least one low-rent yoga community has seen an uptick in newcomers since the economy nosedived. Now matchmakers are thanking the recession for a boom in business.

Psychologists think that tough times heighten people's need for love and companionship. In addition to online dating more singles are turning to matchmakers to help them take advantage of the emotional, and sometimes financial, benefits of being in a relationship.

While I don't doubt the power of love to help get you through a stressful situation, it might not be smart to go looking for a partner when you're in the middle of a personal financial crisis.

Do you think paying for a matchmaker sounds like a good investment for those looking to fill their emotional bank accounts?

Photos courtesy of Bravo

Should Bailed-out Banks Disclose What They Do With Money?

LibertySugar — Mon, 22 Dec 2008 11:00:29 -0800

Out of the 21 banks that received at least $1 billion in government money, none would answer four simple questions posed by the Associated Press: How much has been spent? What was it spent on? How much is being held in savings, and what's the plan for the rest?

When asked, a spokesperson for JPMorgan Chase, which received $25 billion in taxpayer money, said: "We've not given any accounting of, 'Here's how we're doing it.' We have not disclosed that to the public. We're declining to." The $700 billion given to the Treasury Department to buy stock in banks is intended to encourage banks to lend money. Yet lawmakers put in no mechanism or consequences to make sure that happens.

Meanwhile, the AP also reports that the 116 banks that have received a bailout spent $1.6 billion on top-tier executive compensation in 2007. So while their banks faced impending collapse and a need for billions in bailouts, the leaders of the banks received millions in salaries. And now - they won't even tell us where our money is going! I think some executives, and lawmakers who let the bailout go through without any strings, have some explaining to do.

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What Does Your Mr. Right Look Like?

DearSugar — Wed, 25 Mar 2009 06:00:00 -0700

I caught up on Monday's Oprah last night and her guest, Steve Harvey, gave us all a glimpse into the male psyche as he answered a bunch of burning questions about love from an audience full of women. One in particular came to the show with a list of 43 requirements that her dream guy must posses, which included his height, his religious beliefs, his bank account, her need for him to be independent, to be family-oriented, honest, trustworthy, romantic, and clean - just to name a few. Steve sure did get a kick out of it, but this woman was serious - she wants to find Mr. Perfect! I think we all know that there is no such thing as perfection, but there is someone out there that's perfect for you and me. So ladies, if you were to come up with a list of your own, what would your Mr. Right look like?

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Front Page: CA Passes State Budget After All-Nighter

CitizenSugar — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 08:00:39 -0800

After deliberating through the night and securing a breakthrough Republican vote, California state lawmakers have passed a budget deal. The $42 billion budget deficit will be closed with new taxes and severe spending cuts. - SF Chronicle
Nearly 5 million US workers are receiving unemployment benefits, an all-time high. - AP
President Obama is headed to Canada for his first foreign trip as President. - BBC News
US drug companies are outsourcing clinical trials, human studies that determine drug's safety, to other countries, raising ethical and scientific concerns. - New York Times

UBS, the largest Swiss bank, has agreed to reveal names of Americans whom US authorities suspect of using Swiss accounts to evade taxes. The US thinks $20 billion has been hidden, and UBS admitted that some employees participated in a scheme to defraud the US. - Huffington Post
Some Republican governors may turn down federal stimulus money. Critics say that move puts conservative ideology before the needs of the people, but governors say they are wary of the strings attached to the money. - CBS News

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What Was Your Biggest Worry in 2008?

DearSugar — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 07:30:00 -0800

Was it just me or did 2008 feel like a very stressful, yet exciting year? Not only did we make presidential history, but our economy unfortunately made history too. Whether it's your bank account, your career, your relationship, your family, or your future, tell me, what was your biggest worry in 2008?

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More Hunger to Stamp Out? Record Number Use Food Stamps

LibertySugar — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 10:30:30 -0800

Thanks to the official recession, more Americans have fallen into the federal safety net using food stamps in record numbers. In September, 31.5 million Americans participated in the antihunger program, bringing the total to one in 10 Americans, and up 17 percent from the previous year.

Food stamps users received $100 a month to purchase food. To qualify for food stamps a household cannot have more than $2,000 in resources, including cash, bank accounts, or other property (usually not including land or vehicles). The government also imposes income limits. But the program isn't designed to just fill hungry stomachs - the USDA estimates that every $5 in benefits creates $9 in economic activity.

Earlier this year Congress approved spending $5.4 billion over the next 10 years on food stamps, the equivalent of just over one week in Iraq. Considering more and more Americans are relying on food stamps, this seems like a wise investment.

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The How-To Lounge: When Your Wallet Is Lost or Stolen

DearSugar — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

The feeling in the pit of your stomach you get upon learning your wallet’s missing is about as awful as it gets. But knowing how to properly handle the situation can make a world of difference. Recently, I helped my friend through this mess, so let me share the truly invaluable tips I learned. To get the information just read more.

First, determine that your wallet is in fact gone. It sounds silly, but trust me, you don’t want to go through the hassle unless it’s absolutely necessary.
Call your credit card company immediately. If you can, provide them with the last time you know that you had it on you. The sooner you get in touch with them the faster you can make sure nothing is charged.
Many stores often allow purchases on debit cards without asking for proper ID or a pin number. Get online and make sure there are no weird purchases taking place in your checking account. Then call your bank and ask for new checking and savings account numbers.
File a police report as soon as possible. In the likelihood that your ID ends up getting used or a stolen item purchased on your cards is sold, it’s important to have this information on file.
Consider using a purse with a zipper or at the very least, make sure your purse is always tucked under your arm. A purse with a large opening is prime territory for pickpockets.
And some last reminders: Do not keep your social security card in your wallet; make copies of all your personal information (ID, social security card, birth certificate, and passport); never leave your purse unattended!

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