TresSugar

How You Think of Time Can Reveal Angry Disposition

TresSugar — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 13:51:56 -0700

Researchers have concluded that how you perceive time – either actively or passively - can reveal whether you are quick to anger or tend to be placid.

In one test, they asked participants if they were told a Wednesday meeting were moved forward two days, which day would it now be on? Those who said Friday, according to researchers, saw themselves as moving through time (in other words, actively) and were more likely to get angry easily. Those who said Monday were more passive and saw time moving toward them.

In another iteration of the study, the new appointment was either anger-provoking or neutral. If participants were told the new day was the anger-provoking one, they were more likely to describe themselves as moving toward it.

I dunno about this one. I mean, yes, I kind of have a short fuse, but I also value being active rather than passive. What do you think about this study or about studies like this in general?

Three! Two! One! and One More! 2008 Will Last an Extra Second

LibertySugar — Wed, 31 Dec 2008 03:00:27 -0800

Ready to say adios to 2008? You are going to have to wait one whole second longer this New Year's Eve. The world's official timekeepers (who knew we had them?!) have added what they call a leap second to the last day of the year to help sync clocks to the earth's slowing spin on its axis.

The US Naval Observatory - the keeper of the Pentagon's master clock - will add the extra second on Wednesday in coordination with the world's atomic clocks at 23 hours, 59 minutes and 59 seconds Coordinated Universal Time (that's 6:59:59 p.m. EST). It's the 24th second to be added since 1972, when the practice began.

So take one extra second today to soak in all your accomplishments! And don't worry, when the fireworks go off, it's really time to sing "Auld Lang Syne" and lean in for your kiss.

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Barack Obama Adds Time's Person of the Year to Win Column

LibertySugar — Wed, 17 Dec 2008 09:30:39 -0800

The suspense has finally ended. We now know that Time magazine's Person of the Year is, drum roll please, Barack Obama! The President-elect beat out US Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson, director of the Beijing opening ceremonies Zhang Yimou, French President Nicolas Sarkozy, and Alaska Governor Sarah Palin.

The magazine cites Obama's ability to overcome a lack of experience, a funny name, two candidates who are political institutions, and America's racial divide to become President as evidence that he's the person of the year. If you're worried that the feature holds few surprises, Time does pull through with a playful 1980 photo shoot of college freshman Barack Obama. And in the interview, Obama details his views on the economy, his mandate, and his temperament.

Even if Time made a predictable choice, do you agree that Barack Obama is the person of the 2008?

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Do Tell: Are You Always Late or Right on Time?

DearSugar — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 17:00:00 -0700

It seems that most of you feel being late is inconsiderate, and it sends a disrespectful message to those waiting for you. I happen to agree - I'm always on time - but I have friends that are late no matter what, even when they give themselves extra time. I've grown accustomed to it though, and I just consider it their little quirk. Of course, there are always exceptions to the rules, so do tell, are you the person who's usually running late or do you tend to be right on time, if not a little early?

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Do Tell: How Did Your Friendships Change Over Time?

DearSugar — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 07:00:00 -0700

When you've known someone a long time, it's inevitable that you'll experience bumps along the road, but with some friends, those growing pains are more frequent. With age comes maturity and a greater sense of awareness, and sometimes the things that didn't affect us before become serious issues in our present relationships. Friendships can either grow stronger or farther apart over time, so if you've ever struggled with an old friendship, do tell, what changed over the years and what obstacles did you both have to overcome to make your friendship work?

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The How-To Lounge: Becoming More Punctual

DearSugar — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 13:00:00 -0700

If you’ve always been a late person, then being punctual is an important, but oddly challenging, habit to learn. Not only will it come in handy for the boring necessities like paying the bills or making it to the dentist on time, but your friends will be ever so thankful. I’ve put together a few ideas for how to become a person who’s always on time. To see them, read more.

Though some people think that if you’re not early, you’re late, I’ve always believed that right on time is best, give or take two minutes. Unfortunately, if you’re someone who’s perpetually late being on time may seem nearly impossible so I recommend that you start noting events on your calendar as starting 30 minutes before they actually do. It's a little trick that can make a big difference.
Another clever mind trick is to set all of your clocks 10 minutes ahead. Once you’ve made the switch, you’ll probably forget that you even did. Before you know it, you’ll be arriving 10 minutes earlier than you normally do.
If you're having not having any luck sneaking in a few extra minutes, then use the tools technology provides you, like schedule reminders on your computer or cell phone. You can even ask a more punctual friend to give you a call, too.
To determine how far in advance of a reminder you'll need, allow yourself at least an hour to get ready, and realistically calculate travel time, too. Then tack on an additional 30 minutes just to be safe. If you need to, set multiple alarms.
If you just can’t get yourself up and out the door, keep a running list of what the consequences are if you’re late, like extra traffic, a fee, lost dinner reservations, or an angry friend. Repeat them over and over again, or write them on sticky notes and put them up on every door of your house.
As always when learning a new habit, positive reinforcement is necessary. Reward yourself for a job well done and set specific goals you can achieve.

Before you know it, being punctual will become second nature!

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Do Tell: What Do You Consider a Long-Term Relationship?

DearSugar — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 15:00:00 -0700

When a relationship is serious, it’s common to define it as long term in order to qualify its significance. But what does long term really mean? Chitchatting with some girlfriends the other night, I realized that we all had a different length of time that qualified as long term in our books. For some of them it was only a few months, but one was a stickler for length - she said two years! So what about you? Do tell, how much time has to pass before you consider a relationship to be long term? Or does it have more to do with the seriousness than any set amount of time?

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You Asked: My Friends Don't Respect My Time

DearSugar — Tue, 20 May 2008 06:00:00 -0700

Dear Sugar,

I feel like the people in my life don't respect me. Several of my friends and even my boyfriend are very inconsiderate when it comes to our time together. I make plans with them and time and time again, they either cancel or show up extremely late. At first, I stopped and evaluated what I was doing, thinking maybe I should take a hint - I even went as far as confronting my friends and boyfriend on the issue. I explained that I plan my day around our plans and when they don't work out or are moved around, it messes up my day. I have also tried doing it back to them but that does nothing! I don't want to make something out of nothing but I am truly offended. There are so many other things I could be doing besides waiting around for them all day and I am at the point where I am finding myself developing huge resentments against these people. I don't want to end relationships over this. Do you have any suggestions on how I could possibly handle this situation better? - Fed Up Frannie

To see DearSugar's answer, read more.

Dear Fed Up Frannie,

I don't blame you for being fed up with your friends and boyfriend! Of course things come up and sometimes breaking plans is inevitable, but when it's happening time and time again, it just becomes unfair so I'm glad you've addressed this issue.

When you asked them for an explanation, what was their response? Is it just happen circumstance every time or do you feel like they're deliberately avoiding you? If you think you've done everything on your end to rectify the situation to no avail, perhaps it's time to just accept these specific people for who they are. While bailing out on previously made plans is no doubt inconsiderate, the might be doing the best they can.

Going forward, I'd simply let them know how you feel when they don't regard your time. Instead of bottling up your feelings inside, get it off your chest ASAP so you don't end up harboring unnecessary resentment - if they don't know that their actions hurt you, they won't know to stop. If things still don't change, I'd think about moving on from these relationships and aim to spend time with people that are willing to make more of an effort with you and your time. Good luck.

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The How-To Lounge: Keeping in Touch With Old Friends

DearSugar — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Often, even if we have the best of intentions, life tends to get in the way of staying in touch with the people that we care about. It’s easy to put off a phone call for one week and watch it turn into four, until finally a year’s gone by without a single word exchanged. Before you know it, you’ve inadvertently lost a friend that you really cared about and enjoyed having in your life. To check out tips on avoiding this common problem, read more.

There’s no doubt about it, keeping in touch is hard work, but it should be worth it. If making the effort doesn’t seem worth it, then perhaps the person in mind isn’t really someone you want to remain friends with, in which case don’t bother. It sounds harsh, but you'll save yourself a big serving of guilt later on.
Once you’ve made the decision to make the effort, then it’s time to start following through. Schedule your calendar once a month to remind yourself to send an email or make a phone call. Make sure to note all the important dates that pertain to that person, too - their birthday, wedding, graduation, etc.
When your reminder goes off, it’s possible you won't have enough time to devote to a full catch-up call. If that’s the case, make the call a quick one and talk to your friend about setting up a phone date sometime soon. Everyone has time for a two-minute phone call to let the person know that they’re too busy to talk right then, and although a phone date might sound silly, it's a great way to make time without rescheduling your life.
If you haven’t called in a few months or forgot to call her back the last time she called, don’t let yourself continue to avoid calling out of guilt. It'll only make things worse, and of course, the more time that passes the more difficult it will be to pick up that phone.

It truly is invaluable to have people in your life that you’ve shared memories with and who've seen you grow into yourself, so make it work even it means planning ahead!

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Group Therapy: Should I Have Met His Parents by Now?

Thu, 21 Feb 2008 03:00:00 -0800

My boyfriend and I have been together for six months but I haven't met his family. They live in another state but how long is normal to wait until he introduces them to me? I don't want to pressure him, but should I ask him? I feel like we're ready to take that next step in our relationship. Help!

[EDITOR'S NOTE: To be involved in more GROUP THERAPY, click here]

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