TresSugar

Have You Ever Had to Take Out a Restraining Order?

DearSugar — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 06:00:26 -0700

The latest in the Samantha Ronson/Lindsay Lohan saga is that Ronson's family looked into filing a restraining order against Lindsay, for apparently acting erratic and doing drugs. Yikes. Though it sounds like the Ronsons aren't moving forward, restraining orders are no laughing matter.

I have friends who've had to file them against stalkerish guys and in other sticky situations. Is this something you've ever had to deal with or watched a friend deal with? If so, what did you learn from the experience?

Source

How Stephen Colbert "Rocked" the '80s

GiggleSugar — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 10:15:00 -0700

Hard to believe, but Stephen Colbert was the lead in a band back in the '80s. It was a time when love songs and power ballads dominated the airwaves and young Stephen had no problem playing the part of a hard-core ~~rocker~~ stalker. (He had a problem obeying that pesky restraining order, but a "special hidden message" had to be delivered to a "special hidden lady." It just had to.) But those days are long gone and, thankfully, his heavy eyeliner and tight-ass jeans are too.

Handle This: Followed Home

DearSugar — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 11:00:00 -0700

Walking home from a friend’s house late on a Thursday night, you notice a man hovering about a block behind you. He seems to be minding his own business, so you try not to worry and instead, focus on getting home quickly. However in just a few minutes he’s only 20 feet behind you.

Of course there’s no way to be sure that he’s following you, but your gut tells you something is wrong. You’re a minute away from your house, so how would you handle this?

Source

Has a Male Pursuer Ever Left You Feeling Uncomfortable?

DearSugar — Thu, 08 May 2008 12:00:00 -0700

In case you missed it, Uma Thurman has been in court the past few weeks testifying against her stalker, Jack Jordan, who began harassing her in 2005. In an article in the New York Times announcing the guilty verdict, details of both Uma and Jordan's testimonies were revealed. The article writes:

Mr. Jordan testified in his own defense, describing his elaborate visions - which he called the daydreams of an artistic soul - that he was predestined to meet Ms. Thurman and live a happy life with her and her two children. . . . He said he was engaged “in a game of cat and mouse,” with Ms. Thurman, and that he sometimes thought of her as the cat, “courting” him.

I've never encountered someone as persistent and obsessive as this, but my heart goes out to Uma. As a woman, dealing with a man who's overly eager - even in a far more meager capacity - can be pretty terrifying. The men with obsessive and unrelenting behavior whom I've dealt with have always left me feeling violated in some way. Have you experienced something similar? Has a male pursuer ever left you feeling uncomfortable or scared?

Source

You Asked: We're Being Harassed

DearSugar — Tue, 19 Feb 2008 17:00:00 -0800

Dear Sugar,

I'm getting married in a few months to a man with a young child from a previous relationship. Currently there are several warrants out for the mother’s arrest for harassing and stalking me. She does anything and everything to destroy our relationship like threatening him with never seeing his son again if he doesn’t visit on Valentine’s Day. As you can imagine this is hurting our otherwise great relationship. I don't want to get in the middle or tell him what to do, but this is greatly affecting me emotionally. How should I cope with this?

- Sick of the Harassment Hailey

To see Dear Sugar's answer read more

Dear Sick of the Harassment Hailey,

Situations that involve children require a certain degree of sacrifice from the adults. Unfortunately, this mother does not seem inclined to sacrifice anything for anyone. I’m concerned for your safety, and I hope that in addition to arrest warrants, there is also a restraining order against her. Because there is the issue of custody and the welfare of a child at stake, I think you and your fiancé should meet with a lawyer to discuss your rights and the potential legal ramifications of the mother's actions; I doubt this woman is a stable figure for her son and perhaps a psychiatric evaluation needs to be performed by the court system.

As far as emotional help, I would suggest talking to a therapist either with your fiancé or on your own - it might be helpful to have some unbiased support. As I’ve mentioned before, when you’re in a relationship with a person who has a child from a previous relationship, you have to be ready to contend with the ex perhaps indefinitely. It’s not an easy path to walk, but it is possible. With that said, establishing your safety and the safety of your future stepson is the first and most important step in handling this situation. I wish you luck.

Source

American Idol Is Ba-ack!

GiggleSugar — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 16:28:41 -0800

American Idol premiered last night and we know the routine by now: they're gonna show us the worst before the best. But the worst really are the best cuz that's when all the crazies come out of the woodwork. Take this serial killer: he can't sing, he can't rhyme, he can't even spare us the sight of his chest fuzz. He also can't keep his eyes off of Crazy Paula- a red flag in and of itself.

Dear Poll: Have You Ever Had a Stalker?

DearSugar — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 09:00:00 -0800

I feel like we hear about a new celebrity being stalked on a weekly basis. Of course, the paparazzi fuel the fire, exposing celebrities' personal lives to the masses, but the stalkers we hear about in the news take things to a different, very scary level: following them, hiding out in their backyards, digging through their trash, even breaking and entering their homes.

I have been lucky enough to have never been stalked myself, but I know many women who have, so even if it were on a much smaller scale than these celebrities, what I want to know is: Have you ever been stalked?

Source

Group Therapy: Scared of Being Stalked

Thu, 31 May 2007 11:33:00 -0700

The other day as I was walking to my bus I was stopped on the street by a guy saying my name. I did a double take before I realized it was someone who I used to be friends with in college. He was shocked to see me because we haven't had any sort of contact in at least four years. His nickname was fishy because there was something a little fishy about him.

Click here to

He mentioned that he lives very nearby with this other guy I used to know, Drew. The reason I stopped being friends with these guys was because Drew, who was always in love with me, turned into a nightmare stalker. He told everyone we had sex although I have never been intimate with him. He followed me all the way to Europe where he searched every Irish pub until he found me-after I had made it blatantly clear that I did not want to see him ever again. I know that the first thing Fishy did when he got home was to tell Drew about seeing me. Now I'm scared sh**less that Drew is once again going to crazily stalk me. I've already gotten three phone calls from an unrecognizable phone number. I don't know what to do, please help! Any words of wisdom are greatly appreciated.

Scared Of Stalker Suzie

[EDITOR'S NOTE: To be involved in more GROUP THERAPY, click here]

Say What? Nicolas Cage Calls Mime Stalker Unsettling

TresSugar — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 15:00:00 -0800

"I was being stalked by a mime - silent but maybe deadly. Somehow, this mime would appear on the set of Bringing Out the Dead and start doing strange things. I have no idea how it got past security. Finally, the producers took some action and I haven’t seen the mime since. But it was definitely unsettling."

- Nicolas Cage discusses what it felt like to be stalked by a mime. Unsettling indeed.

Grab Bag: What One Woman Learned From Judy Blume

TresSugar — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 12:00:00 -0800

Writer tells us 8 high school sex lessons she learned from Judy Blume. - Lemondrop
Right on! A Golden Girls Bea Arthur tattoo. - Best Week Ever
Can you start from square one with an ex? - Em & Lo
GPS panties? Awesome if your boyfriend is a stalker. - The Frisky
What your closet says about your dating life. - Your Tango
If I'm so crazy, why do people keep having sex with me? - The Onion
The "best" of Levi Johnston's Twitter. Wow, dude. - Buzzfeed
Did you like your past boyfriends' names? - Glamour
The comics world isn't just a boys' club anymore. - Double X
Emma Thompson to remove name from petition supporting Roman Polanski. - Jezebel