TresSugar

Hair or No Hair? What's Your Preference?

Tue, 20 Nov 2007 14:00:00 -0800

My boyfriend has only ever seen my private parts when they're clean shaven. I want to just leave it all natural and just trim it from time to time when I have to, but I feel so nervous of what he might think. I have really dark hair and I know it's natural to have hair down there, but what is all of your preferences? I get tired of shaving and getting laser treatments is out of the question at the moment.

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Male Pubic Hair: To Shave or Not

DearSugar — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 11:00:00 -0700

There is a new trend catching on - male grooming, "down there," and the jury is still out on whether or not it's a do or a don't.

Originally, women liked to get Brazilian waxes or shave their bikini line so they could wear tiny bathing suits, but now, we women are keeping our lady parts trimmed and waxed for aesthetic purposes too.

If you think about it, it makes sense for men too. Getting rid of unwanted hair down there will not only make guys feel more comfortable and clean, but it will also be an added bonus for women when they give their boyfriends oral sex.

I happen to be a big advocate of personal grooming, although keeping a little fluff down there is beneficial for your protection. So what's your opinion on the subject? Are you into guys shaving all of the hair off their manhood? Are you into a little trimming? Or are you into a guy that just goes au' natural?

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Group Therapy: Do "All" Girls Shave Around Their Nipples?

Wed, 05 Sep 2007 14:00:00 -0700

One of my last random NCMO partners was telling me that almost every girl shaves the darker hairs around their breast nipples even though they will never talk about it. I'm curious if he's right because that seemed like a pretty big generalization to me. And honestly, I'm a little scared to go at my breast with a razor! I only have a few dark hairs (an average amount I'm sure), but this guy dates mostly super models so I think he's begun to expect perfection. SO--Do most of you shave the darker hairs around your nipples?

[EDITOR'S NOTE: To be involved in more GROUP THERAPY, click here]

Manscaping!

GiggleSugar — Sun, 15 Jul 2007 00:30:00 -0700

Now that summer's here, most beach-bound guys must dare to bare their chest hair. Some have none. Some have a ton. And some have a little too much fun. The following dudes have entered the College Humor Creative Manscaping Photo Contest to show off their summer style. Mr. Mantini (above) has my vote. What's your favorite?

View 6 Photos ›

The How-To Lounge: Getting a Clean, Close Shave

DearSugar — Thu, 08 Mar 2007 06:01:00 -0800

Spring has sprung, and the pants will make their way back into storage and the hemlines will rise. I'm certainly not ready to expose all that skin, so let's focus on preparing ourselves for the sassy skirts.

Most women hate to shave, and I'm one of them! Do you ever feel as if you've doubled and tripled shaved, but the second you dry off, the goose bumps rreveal you've got to shave all over again? Every woman is different and hair texture is different, too, but hopefully these tips will get you a better, smoother shave.

To see my advice read more

When you're showering, shaving should be the last thing you do; the moisture will open your pores. Never shave dry legs; it irritates your skin and can cause ingrown hairs or bumps
Exfoliate your legs before shaving to remove any extra layers of dead skin
Always make sure to use a new razor blade. Dull razors are no help with coarse hair
Use a light touch when shaving and always shave opposite the growth. A close friend once advised me to shave on a diagonal, as most hair grows in at an angle
Lather your skin with a moisturizing shaving cream or gel. Soap can be very drying, so use a heavily moisturized soap if you must. My friend taught me another trick: use hair conditioner as shaving cream. No matter what, you need to create a smooth surface that keeps your skin moist and moisturized, so the razor will glide easily
After you've dried off, make sure to moisturize
New razors can mean nicks; if you cut yourself, use a styptic stick which stop bleeding on minor cuts and razor nicks, which you can find at any drugstore

Good luck, ladies! I am so ready for strappy-sandal weather.

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Product of the Day: Coochy Shave

GiggleSugar — Wed, 30 Jul 2008 10:00:00 -0700

Look! It's my new favorite product Coochy Shave from my new favorite website, Shop in Private. I love how they spell it out for you by adding "shaving lotion for private areas" after the brand name, even though "Coochy Shave" should be pretty self-explanatory. Shop in Private is your one-stop shopping destination if you're looking for back shavers, fart-smell reducers, or penis pumps. What are you waiting for?

Relationship Protocol: How Often Do You Shave Your Legs?

DearSugar — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 15:00:00 -0700

When you're settled in a happy, loving relationship, it can be easy to let primping fall by the wayside, like forgoing sexy lingerie for comfy PJ pants. Of course, it's important to keep the romance alive, but I'm wondering - how often do you shave your legs when you're settled down in a cozy relationship?

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Hump Day: Sex Makes Her Uncomfortable

TresSugar — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 07:30:23 -0800

Welcome to Hump Day, TrèsSugar's sex advice column. If you have questions about sex, send them to TrèsSugar, and our friend Dr. Charlie Glickman from Good Vibrations will offer his sound advice!

Today's Question:
I'm 24 and in my first relationship. I really like the guy, we've been going out for six months, but I get nervous whenever he slips his hand under my underwear. He gets the hint and stops. I don't mind him doing other things (we haven't slept together yet), but I wish I wasn't such a prude. I don't know what he expects and I worry that he will be grossed out, as I only shave/wax the bikini line but not the whole thing. What if he thinks it is ugly? I also don't know what I should expect; he knows I'm a virgin, but I don't know how to speak to him about why I get uncomfortable, and I don't know how to overcome it! I also have a few stretch marks and worry that he will be grossed out by them. Please help?

To read Dr. Glickman's response, read more.

Thank you for sharing this challenging situation. I know that it can be scary to talk about things like this, but these are all really common thoughts.

One of the things that can help when you’re on the edge of your comfort zone is to take it very slowly. It’ll probably help to tell your guy about your discomfort, even if you can’t tell him why it’s there. You could simply say "I have a lot of discomfort around sex." You also might want to do a little solo exploration. It takes the pressure off because there aren’t any partner expectations. Check out the wonderful book Becoming Orgasmic. If you’re looking for tips or ideas for techniques, Tickle Your Fancy is full of suggestions. Once you know a bit more about what you like or dislike, you and your boyfriend might be able to find something that you both like to do.

It’s worth mentioning that vulvas come in all different shapes. (The vulva is the external female anatomy. The vagina is the inside part.) There’s a long history of negative attitudes towards the vulva, but each one is unique and beautiful in its own way. A lot of women have the idea that there’s something wrong with their vulvas because they don’t look like what we see in porn or because they have hair, and I think that’s unfortunate. I strongly recommend getting to know your parts and Scarleteen has a great site about that. It’s geared towards teens, but there's lots of amazing info about sex, bodies, and pleasure.

Another option would be to explore some of these concerns with a therapist. When you have an itch on your back, you need someone else to scratch it. Therapists help us by reaching the spots we can’t reach on our own. Lastly, depending on where you are, you could join a body-image support group. While they tend not to focus on sexuality, they can be an incredibly helpful way to work through our concerns about our bodies and how we (or other people) feel about them.

Working through these challenges isn’t always easy, but it can be very rewarding. Whatever route you choose, I hope you find the pleasure and joy that you deserve.

What Facial Hair Do You Prefer on a Man?

TresSugar — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 11:00:37 -0800

Even though November is National Beard Month, not all women are fans of a furry face. Maybe you prefer the smoothness of a freshly shaved face, or the edgy look of a barley-there scruffy goatee. Then again, you might be a fan of the ironic hipster mustache.

Weigh in on your favorite look for a man, and make sure you don't miss our slideshow of celebrity hotties who manage to pull off their beards . . . for the most part at least!

Britney's New Do: But What Does It Mean?

DearSugar — Thu, 22 Feb 2007 17:00:00 -0800

The pictures are everywhere: Britney Spears shaving her own head. At the young age of 25, she's famous, wealthy, accomplished in the music industry, twice divorced and the mother of two young children. Lately, she's raised eyebrows with her questionable fashion choices, missing panties and inelegant photographs, and constant clubbing. She now seems to be flirting with rehab, which means she may not be honestly in touch with the gravity of her situation.

We all surmise she's lost, out-of-control, and in need of real and serious help. But there's still the question of why Britney would shave her head, what the significance or motivation behind such a decision might be.

To read more read more

In this brief editorial, one therapist suggests it's an act of rebellion against her mother and management, after over a decade of control:

And Britney has the biggest job of all, she needs to learn to love life again. This is a massive act of rebellion and if it isn’t caused by the puppeteered life she has had, then you can bet your bottom dollar that she is wanting to escape, to break out of the body of Britney. The trouble with the act she has made is that is that the real problems are only ever within, that is the place where there work must be done.

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And in this longer article, psychoanalyst Bethany Marshall delves into the ways in which Britney may be acting out because she hasn't developed the skills to express herself in healthy, assertive ways:

"This is a major form of acting out," she said. "She's not using words and language as a way to express what's going on. She's doing things - the crotch shots, shaving her head, the tattoos. It says that she hasn't learned to assert herself and become independent through self assertion rather than through acting out.

"The hair represents the stylists, the handlers, people who are in control of her life and manage her looks," Marshall added. "Now she's saying, I'm in charge of my looks."

Marshall also suspects that the shearing and the tattoos could have been Britney's rebellion against the insistence she go to rehab. Sadly, she may have left in order to assert personal control of her life. Marshall also suggests that "psychotherapy would be the best thing for her," and hopes Britney will "seek therapy, have her own autonomous life . . . step out of the limelight for a while."

Things can only get better or worse for Britney. We here at DearSugar hope she puts down the scissors and grabs the chance to become an independent, responsible, and self-aware woman. Then she can shave her head again, just because she wants to.

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