TresSugar

Getting Down and Dirty in the Pool Ain't Clean

FitSugar — Fri, 17 Jun 2011 09:47:57 PDT

If warm, sunny weather is inspiring you to get hot and heavy, you may want to skip getting it on in the pool, and save your nookie time for dry land. Although making sweet love in the water sounds sensual and natural, since you're wearing next to nothing already, it's not exactly the safest way to get it on.

Here's a mood killer for you: lake, river, ocean, and pond water contain bacteria, so getting intimate can introduce that bacteria into your vagina, which could put you at risk for infections that you don't want up there. Pool water is no better since it contains chlorine that could irritate your lady business, or disrupt the natural pH balance in your vagina, leading to a yeast infection. As for hot tubs, they're often not chlorinated enough, which means they're teeming with who knows what - bacteria!

Still not convinced? Then

read more. You may have heard that getting busy underwater will prevent sexually transmitted infections (STIs) or pregnancy, but this is not true. As long as there is contact between two partners, semen and other bodily fluids can still pass from one person to another, which makes conception or contraction of STIs possible. You're using a condom, you say? Although in the bedroom, condoms are very effective at preventing both pregnancy and the spread of infection, in the water, the lack of natural lubrication can make condoms more apt to break or slip off without either person realizing it. Not to mention, the lack of natural moisture can also cause friction, which will chafe your sensitive lady parts. Water and sex just don't mix, so my advice is to reserve pool time for swimming, and save the shagging for later.

Group Therapy: New Dating Partner and HPV

Tres Community — Mon, 23 May 2011 03:05:02 PDT

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

I have been dating this wonderful guy for the last two months and we were going to get intimate for the first time last night. He goes on to tell me that he does not want to because he has HPV and does not want to infect me. Little does he know that I also have HPV. I didn't tell him because I'm embarrassed, but he was so honest with me. HPV - not warts, the one that effects the cells - is the one we both have.

What's the best way to handle this?

Have a dilemma of your own? Post it anonymously to Group Therapy for advice, and check out what else is happening in the TrèsSugar Community.

UK Ad Campaign Tells Baby Boomers to Put on Condoms

TresSugar — Wed, 15 Sep 2010 10:30:10 PDT

For Sexual Health Week, the UK's Family Planning Association is targeting middle-age Brits after statistics revealed they're contracting STDs twice as often as they were a decade ago.

I have to give the campaign credit. Depicting people our parents' age on sex benders is a dangerous pursuit, but these ads focus on their fashion prime rather than their sexual second wind.

And we've seen a lot of retro ads - I'm guessing these pictures are real - and these look just about right. My only complaint? The "wear this" tagline doesn't exactly work for women.

View 4 Photos ›

Group Therapy: Husband Lied About Sexual Health

Tres Community — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 06:00:25 PDT

This question comes from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

My husband was in the military before I met him and contracted herpes. He knew he had it and was treating it secretly. Before we got married I asked him if he's been tested for HIV and everything and he said yes and that he didn't have anything. Now after 16 years of marriage and 2 teenage kids, I found out that he has it and he never told me! I had to ask him! Who knows if he ever would of told me! I'm so hurt and angry I don't know what to do. He's a great guy, everyone loves him, we have a great marriage, but who does that???!! Is he really the person I thought he was? He said he was ashamed and scared I woudn't marry him. He could of told me when I got pregnant the first time! I wouldn't of been so mad and happy that HE told me instead of me figuring it out.

Find out more after the jump.

MTV: Check-In on Foursquare During STD Checkup

TresSugar — Tue, 31 Aug 2010 12:30:54 PDT

MTV has jumped in bed with Foursquare, hoping that a lust for badges will help young people get on board with STD testing. As part of its GYT (Get Yourself Tested) campaign, the network wants people to check-in when getting checked out for STDs. Doing so, will unlock the GYT badge, letting your friends know that you are taking control of your sexual health - hopefully, they won't follow up for the results.

This seems like a smart and engaging way to spread the word about stopping the spread of STDs. According to MTV's figures, one in two people will contract an STD by the age of 25, so anything that reduces the stigma of testing can't hurt. Would you blast this info for a badge?

Hump Day: How to Avoid Unprotected Sex

TresSugar — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 04:00:04 PDT

Welcome to Hump Day, TrèsSugar's sex advice column. If you have questions about sex, send them to TrèsSugar, and our friend Dr. Charlie Glickman from Good Vibrations will offer his sound advice!

Today's question: I’ve noticed that guys are willing to have sex without a condom. How can I bring it up without killing the mood and without resenting them for trying to have sex without protection?

Get Dr. Glickman's advice after the jump.

Hump Day: Life After HPV

TresSugar — Wed, 04 Aug 2010 10:00:33 PDT

Welcome to Hump Day, TrèsSugar's sex advice column. If you have questions about sex, send them to TrèsSugar, and our friend Dr. Charlie Glickman from Good Vibrations will offer his sound advice!

Today's question:
“I just found out I have HPV. Since it’s a pretty common STI, I’m curious if I have to tell everyone and since I probably want to, I’m wondering what’s the best way to go about that.”

To see Dr. Glickman's answer, keep reading.

Have You Been Tested For STDs?

TresSugar — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 08:00:00 PST

Now that we know 10 to 25 percent of people who have herpes don't know it, it seems safe to assume that many people aren't getting tested for STDs. It's no surprise really. You often have to ask your doctor for it, and most people won't if they don't have symptoms. And, whether we admit or not, who really wants to know?

8 Surprising Stats About Who Has STDs in America

TresSugar — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 10:45:33 PST

Sixty-five million people are living with STDs in the United States, and each year 15 million people contract one or more infections. Yet it's one of the most under-recognized health problems in the country. Here's a breakdown of just how surprisingly common they are.

20 percent of people in the US has an STD.
50 percent of sexually active youths will contract an STD by 25.
20 percent of high-school girls have an STD.
1 in 5 people over 12 have genital herpes as a result of type one or two herpes, though most genital herpes are from type two.
Only around 10 to 25 percent of people infected with genital herpes know they have it.

To see the rest,

Hump Day: Having Sex With Herpes

TresSugar — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 04:00:28 PST

Welcome to Hump Day, TrèsSugar's sex advice column. If you have questions about sex, send them to TrèsSugar, and our friend Dr. Charlie Glickman from Good Vibrations will offer his sound advice!

Today's question:

“I contracted genital herpes in my last relationship. I now feel like I am cursed to never be in a sexual relationship again. How do I tell new partners that I have herpes? If thanks to my prescription I haven't had an outbreak in a really long time, do I have to tell?”

To see Dr. Glickman's answer,

read more. There’s a lot of stigma attached to sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and it’s always seemed so strange to me. After all, lots of people who don’t think twice about spreading the flu or other illnesses often freak out about STIs. For centuries, STIs were seen as divine retribution against sex. But these days, we know that they’re caused by bacteria and viruses, just like colds, measles, and such. Herpes medications make outbreaks less likely, but since the virus is present on the surface of the skin and can be transmitted to someone else medication doesn't give you a 100 percent guarantee. So even if you never have another outbreak, it’s still possible to transmit herpes. That being said, you are definitely not "cursed to never be in a sexual relationship again." There are also lots of people who understand how herpes works and how to have safer sex. So while it’s a bit more complicated for you, it’s nowhere near as hard as it feels right now. As for whether you have to tell someone, my personal belief is that a healthy sexual relationship depends on informed consent and that can only exist when someone has full information. Assuming that you decide to tell potential partners, there are a few different elements to consider: when to tell someone, what to tell them, and how to tell it. I’ll take on each of these separately. When to tell someone: You’ll likely be better off if you let a potential partner know about your situation before things have gotten past the point of being able to make a good decision. But, it’s also not really necessary to tell someone before you’re even sure that you want to have sex with them. Perhaps after a first kiss, so you at least know that there’s some chemistry, and it's before clothes come off. If someone is going to have a negative reaction, it’ll probably be a lot bigger if you tell them after you have sex with them and it’ll almost definitely be much bigger if they find out by having an outbreak. That’s the sort of thing that can lead to a breakup. What to tell someone: It can be as simple as “I have herpes. I take medication and I haven’t had an outbreak since…" Or it can be more detailed, depending on how much you know and how much you want to share. You can get lots of great info at www.herpes.com or check out the books Managing Herpes or The Good News About Bad News: Herpes. You could also tell them where you have had outbreaks since those are the places that the virus would be most likely to spread from. That can help you strategize around safer sex. One of the hassles of herpes is that condoms don’t always cover all of the places that it can show up. If you’re going to receive oral sex, you can use a dental dam. Dams come in latex and non-latex versions. If you’ve never used dental dams before, page 12 of this guide tells you all about them, along with lots of other great safer sex info. The Female Condom covers more of the vulva, giving you some extra protection. The manufacturer is currently producing the FC2, which will be less expensive and feel somewhat better, so I expect them to be available soon. Gloves can also help reduce the risk of transmission and they’re really easy to use and can be kind of sexy. How to tell someone: I find that the best way to do it is to be upfront about it and not let embarrassment or shame creep in. The calmer you are and the more direct you are, the easier it’ll be for a potential partner to hear. If you’re nervous about it, that’ll send a message that this is something to be anxious about. If you have a friend or two that you can tell about having herpes, it’ll give you a chance to practice saying it without the pressure of worrying if it will complicate things. Think about how you might tell someone you’re going to have dinner with that you’re vegetarian or that you’re allergic to seafood. It’s important information that you’re sharing in order to find a solution. Try to tell a potential sexual partner about this in the same way. Herpes is definitely not the end of your sex life. It’s simply something to take into consideration. It might take a little practice to figure out when, what, and how to tell someone, but plenty of other people have found ways to do it and you can, too.