TresSugar

What's With Men Shooting Way Out of Their League?

DearSugar — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Do you ever notice that gorgeous women are always getting hit on by not-so-gorgeous guys? In the movie Knocked Up, this point is illustrated to a T when Ben says, "You're prettier than I am," right before pouncing on Alison.

Although these characters are fictional, this happens all the time, and now there's a study to prove it. No matter how unattractive a guy thinks he is, nothing will stop him from hitting on a woman who looks like she should be on the cover of Elle magazine. In this study, 16,550 people were asked to rate their attractiveness and the looks of the people they date. The researchers discovered that men think appearance is way up there on the scale of importance, more so than women, and their own less-attractive appearance wouldn't stand in their way when it comes to going for a "hottie."

To hear more about this interesting topic, read more.

Perhaps this is due to men hoping women are more interested in inner beauty, or maybe male egos have something to do with it too. Whatever the case, the study suggests that eventually, men learn to accept that they most likely won't be able to get a date with an overly beautiful woman, since "The 10s among us, both male and female, want only to date other 10s." But hey, I give these guys credit for trying - you never know what could happen!

Will the Real Eliot Spitzer Please Stand Up?

GiggleSugar — Tue, 18 Mar 2008 14:30:00 -0700

Let's beat a dead horse, shall we? The Eliot Spitzer sex scandal took the nation by storm last week and although the dude is officially outta office, the internets are still gonna have their way with him. A number of Photoshop pros put their skillz to work and pimped out the former governor of New York - free of charge. Gothamist is hosting the Photoshop fun fest and the submissions have been nothing short of money. Take a peek. As for the photo to the left of Spitz in a purple pimp suit, let's be honest - that came straight outta the family album. No Photoshop there. But ladies, you know you likey . . .

View 6 Photos ›

Source

Hillary Talks Sexism, Obama's Job Offer, and Mad Men to Vogue

TresSugar — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 10:00:35 -0800

Hillary Clinton finally sat down for a long-overdue Vogue interview. She offended editor Anna Wintour during the primaries by turning down the fashion mag out fear of looking "too feminine." And though she won't be on the December cover, the article is as substantial and satisfying as a cover story.

From night swimming alone to her favorite shows (Mad Men!), we see a side of Madame Secretary that all the vetting in the world would not unearth. See some of what she had to say below.

On visiting countries as a high-ranking female: "You can go to some countries and there's not a woman in the room. They don't even make the effort to give me the token woman minister. . . . And in lots of African countries the honorific for women is 'Mama.' So I had lots of people say to me, 'Mama, what about this; Mama, what about that?'"

On President Obama's job offer: "I was stunned after the election when President Obama asked me to consider this. . . . I really was very unconvinced. I did not think it was the right thing to do. I didn't want to do it. I just really had a lot of doubts, and I kept suggesting other people: Well, how about this person! How about that person! This one would be really good! But then a friend of mine called me and basically said, 'How would you have felt if you'd been elected and you'd called him and asked him to do this?' And that really made a big impression on me. How do you say no? And so . . . I said yes. And here I am."

On Mad Men: "That's how it was! That's why the women's-liberation movement was so shocking. It was like news from outer space"

See what else she had to say after the jump.

Palin: AP Did "Opposition Research" on Going Rogue

TresSugar — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 15:00:25 -0800

Sarah Palin blasted the Associated Press yesterday for doing "opposition research," more commonly known as fact-checking, on her new book Going Rogue.

"Amazingly, but not surprisingly, the AP somehow nabbed a copy of the book before it was released," she said. "They're now erroneously reporting on the book's contents and are repeating many of the same things they spewed during the campaign and afterwards."

She wrote this on her Facebook page, which doesn't help her cause, but she is onto something. Going Rogue is embargoed, meaning her publisher will not release advance copies to the press before its on-sale date (tomorrow), and the press, even if it were to happen upon a copy early, is not to review it.

So what did the "opposition researchers" find? Find out after the jump.

Ask a Trader: Is He Into Me?

TresSugar — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 06:00:00 -0800

Conventional Wisdom is a different kind of advice column. Your questions will be answered by people from all walks of life rather than by advice experts. This week, a trader helps out a frustrated woman. If you have a question you'd like answered on Conventional Wisdom, you can submit it here.

Today's question:

I have been seeing this man for a little over a month. He is significantly older than me (13 years) and pretty busy. We talked last weekend and both said we wanted to take things slow due to failed past relationships (jumping into them too quickly; he was engaged).

That's perfectly fine with me, but the problem is that we never talk. We Facebook message each other, but it's extremely brief two word phrases. When the weekend hits, we might see each other one day. When we do see each other, he acts like he really enjoys my company until I say something nice (he runs a gallery, so I told him if he ever needs help getting a show set up, to let me know) in which case he kind of buries his head. He also won't respond if I send him a compliment via one of our Facebook messages.

He does let me keep some toiletries at his house if I ever spend the night, which is rare - we don't have sex either. I really like this guy and want to get to know him, but it seems impossible and I feel like I'm just getting strung along. Should I talk to him and tell him what I expect with "taking it slow" or something? Or does it seem he really isn't into me at all? Would he really string me along if he knows I don't want to get hurt anymore?

Signed,
Taking it Too Slow

To see the trader's answer, read more.

Dear Taking it Too Slow,

It sounds like, for whatever reason, this guy is not romantically attracted to you. You are right to worry that he lets you stay overnight and keep toiletries at his house, without ever making a move. You say you really like him, but I must recommend that you not waste too much more time on him without knowing he feels the same way because it sounds like you keep putting forth effort, without getting anything back from him. Tell him how you feel, and if he shares those feelings then you can explore the possibility of a real relationship together. If he says he's just not ready, this is your cue to move on and trade up. And no need to second-guess breaking off your sexless sleepovers: if he really does have feelings for you, he'll come back when he's ready, and if you want to, you can give him another shot.

Signed,
A Trader

Someone Cared! Woman Called 911 in Richmond Rape Case

TresSugar — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 11:22:01 -0800

Margarita Vargas, an 18-year-old woman from Richmond, CA (and a graduate of Richmond High) was the lone person who called 911 on the night a teenager was gang raped outside her high school while a homecoming party was still going on. It's alleged that at least 20 people watched and did nothing. Vargas says that her brother-in-law came home and told her he'd seen a woman being raped; it was Vargas who insisted they call the police.

It might seem pretty sad that we're applauding Vargas for doing what people should do, as she said, "without thinking twice," but you'd be surprised how often people are apathetic. So many people are saying, "What do you expect of Richmond?" but I can say, as someone who was grabbed on the streets of San Francisco in broad daylight and ignored when I asked for help - apathy happens everywhere, in all communities. (Just read about the bystander effect.)

Many years ago, I was walking down a busy street in a popular business district in a "good neighborhood" and a man grabbed me inappropriately. I had just bought coffee, so instinctively, I poured it in his face and grabbed onto him, hoping to get him arrested. As I grappled with him, trying to make eye contact with people walking by, riding by on their bikes, driving by, and yelling, "Someone help! This man attacked me!" no one did anything. Eventually, I couldn't hold the man any longer, and he got away, perhaps to assault someone else later. Helping out is rarer than you think, so kudos to Margarita, who even walked over to the school to make sure the police had arrived.

Ask an Older Woman: Help! My Friend's With a Married Man

TresSugar — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 06:00:00 -0800

Conventional Wisdom is a different kind of advice column. Your questions will be answered by people from all walks of life rather than by advice experts. If you have a question you'd like answered on Conventional Wisdom, you can submit it here.

Today's question: One of my good friends has been seeing a married man for about a year. He also just happens to be her boss. When we get together, she bombards me with the details of their relationship. He tells her he's never been happier, and that he'll leave his wife for her soon (yeah, we've heard that one before!) and she seems to believe him. My problem with this whole thing is that not only am I sick of listening to her, and of course could tell her so, but I've lost respect for her. Is it wrong to break up with a friend who's doing things I find morally reprehensible? Is there anything I can do to get through to her that what she is doing is horrible for her, not to mention this man's wife?

Signed, Confused Friend.

To hear what an older woman has to say, read more
Dear Confused Friend,

Ahh, the folly of youth. For every bad relationship I bored my friends with, I in turn listened to details about men (or women) they were with who didn't deserve them. It's part of being a friend.

My best advice to you is to be honest with your friend. You don't mention if you've told her how you feel, or if you did, how she reacted. If you haven't, now is the time to start. Tell her you care about her, but you think that contributing to cheating is morally messed up, and that in the end she's probably just going to get hurt. (I guess "the other woman" sometimes ends up with the guy, but who wants to end up with a cheater?) Also, sleeping with your married boss? Pretty dumb. Do other people in her office know? This is not good for her professional life either. I'd tell her that, too, although it's hard to imagine an adult who doesn't know this.

If you really like this friend and this is the only thing she's done that makes you question her character, ride it out and hope she comes to her senses. There's only so much advice we can give people. If you've told her how you feel and she continues with this affair, that's her decision. If she steers you toward this topic when you hang out, just let her know you don't feel comfortable listening to it anymore.

Sometimes, though, if friends do sketchy things, those acts are a window into the rest of their sketchy selves. I had a friend who not only cheated on her husband once, but throughout their marriage, and I began to notice that her behavior towards him mirrored her behavior towards me and everyone else. She was selfish, narcissistic and unable to ever admit fault. We'd had fun partying together when we were younger, but as we grew older, I realized I needed to respect my friends. After a blowout fight when she said horrible things to me, I took it as my cue to get out, and I dumped her.

You're in a tricky situation, but honesty is the best policy. If you can't be honest with her, maybe you aren't really great friends to begin with, in which case slowly turning down her invitations to hang out and discuss him should send her a message. Good luck!

Très Bizarre: Plastic Surgeon Sculpts His Perfect Bride

TresSugar — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 10:15:00 -0800

This story is très bizarre and très depressing. When plastic surgeon Reza Vossough met his future bride Cany, he identified a few areas for improvement - specifically, her chest, thighs, eyes, lips, butt, stomach, and forehead. Lucky for Reza, once he and Cany got married he performed eight procedures that would turn his 33-year-old wife into his "perfect woman."

Speaking about his work, Reza said: "It's almost like being God - you have the ability to change nature." No promise that it will look natural, however. And don't feel too bad for Cany. She seems pretty happy, explaining that when you marry a plastic surgeon, "the scalpel is your friend."

I guess the old adage that you can never really change someone isn't true in this case.

Obama's Foursome Finally Includes a Woman

TresSugar — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 10:10:00 -0700

The 44th president has played 24 rounds of golf (who's counting?) since he came to office. How many women have been invited along with the golfer in chief? One. This weekend, President Obama's chief domestic policy adviser Melody Barnes became the first woman to play golf with the president.

Last week, Obama sounded pretty enlightened about modern gender roles. He said that after he had kids, he realized that Michelle should not be solely responsible for running the house just because she's a woman. But it seems that Obama has been having a hard time translating these enlightened ideas to sports, as he typically plays basketball and golf with men only.

Hanging out socially with the boss is always good for career advancement, and it's a bit disappointing that the president was perpetuating the idea that these traditionally all-male activities are still for for members of the "boys club." Hopefully any of the sporty women on staff will now feel welcome to play in these very visible games.

Have you ever felt excluded from activities (social or work-related) because you're a woman?

Très Bizarre: Man Charged For Being Naked in His Kitchen

TresSugar — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 06:00:00 -0700

Spending more time around the house naked might be good for the planet, but it could also land you in jail. The state of Virginia has charged Eric Williamson, 29, with indecent exposure for hanging out nude in his own home.

Early Monday morning, around 5:30 a.m., a naked Eric was making a cup of Joe in his kitchen. At the same time, a woman and her 7-year-old boy happened to walk through Eric's front yard. She called the police, who quickly arrived on the scene and arrested Eric. The reporting officers must have given Eric a chance to get dressed, because he's wearing clothes in his mug shot.

The police say that Eric wanted the strangers to see him naked. If prosecutors can prove that, Eric might be sentenced to a year in jail and a $2,000 fine. Considering it was so early in the morning and still dark out, it seems unlikely that he was standing in his kitchen naked waiting for random passersby to catch a glimpse. I doubt Eric will be convicted, but he still must be pretty upset about the whole situation. Perhaps the lady cutting through his lawn should be the one facing the law!