TresSugar

True Confession - My Husband Isn't the Father of Our Son

DearSugar — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 10:28:30 -0700

Weigh in and tell us if you forgive or not forgive this True Confession.

"I did a secret DNA test for my son and my husband. Turns out I lied to everyone. I was so sure he wasn't my ex's, but I was wrong. I feel such a strong urge to tell him the truth but it will rip my husband apart. Can I be forgiven for keeping this secret to myself?"

Source

The Most Effed Up Maury Paternity Test Yet

GiggleSugar — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 07:00:00 -0800

The Godfather of Paternity Testing found the messiest love triangle, took some blood, and astonished the crowd with the mind-blowing results. Our momma slept with her boyfriend's brother and isn't sure who the father is. Given the genetics involved, the baby looks like both of the bros. It's a ghastly sitch to be in, but it gets much worse. . .

A Maury Moment in Nature

GiggleSugar — Sat, 29 Sep 2007 01:00:00 -0700

You saw it first on the "The Maury Show," now watch how it happens in nature. I'm referring to the phenomenon known as the "I'm Not The Baby Daddy" boogie. The paternity test results are in and this female emu is not a happy camper. Her mate, on the other hand, is trying hard to contain himself, but he just...can't.

The "You Are The Baby Daddy" Boogie

GiggleSugar — Fri, 09 Feb 2007 10:56:46 -0800

Not too long ago, we showed you the "I'm Not The Baby Daddy" boogie. To be fair to all parties involved, we thought it only appropriate to also feature the "You Are The Baby Daddy" boogie. All of this is courtesy of Maury Povich (of course)- the papa of paternity testing.

The "I'm Not The Baby Daddy" Boogie

GiggleSugar — Fri, 26 Jan 2007 14:00:00 -0800

Maury Povich seems to have a fetish for phobias- pickles, peaches, and- of course- daddy phobias. He's the godfather of televised paternity testing and here's one of my favorite life-altering Maury "Who's the Daddy?" moments. Pop the bubbly, cuz boyfriend can boogie.

What Do You Think About OTC Paternity Tests?

TresSugar — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 12:00:00 -0700

The UK Sun had an article today about how over-the-counter paternity tests would soon be available in Britain. Little did I know that they've been legally available online in California, Oregon, and Washington since 2008.

The American kits, created by Identigen, sell for about $30 and come with cotton swabs that are to be used for taking samples from the inside of the baby, mother, and man's mouth. Once these samples are sealed in plastic bags along with $119 lab fee and a consent form, they're sent in for analysis. The results can be accessed online within three to five working days.

Although the results are supposed to have 99.99 percent accuracy, they're not allowed as evidence in court, where a more expensive and standard DNA test is required.

Some people think it's a bad idea to make this information so easily available. The person who would stand to lose most from the results, they reason, is the child who is suddenly without a father. What do you think about over-the-counter paternity tests?

Home Paternity Tests?

DearSugar — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 07:00:00 -0700

You and your boyfriend are in the nursery, coo-ing over your five month old son. He's adorable, but when your guy says, "He doesn't look anything like me," something clicks. You realize that he totally has your ex boyfriend's nose. Could it be that your boyfriend really isn't the father after all? Who wants to deal with going to the doctor to find out now? Well you won't have to because home paternity tests are making their way onto drugstore shelves.

The Identigene kit (costing $22.99), uses DNA to determine paternity. It includes swabs so you can collect cell samples from inside the cheeks of your child and the alleged father. Collection of your cells isn't necessary, but it's recommended for best results. You wrap the swabs up and send them off to the Sorenson laboratory in Salt Lake City. You wait three to five of the longest days of your life, and then the results are reported online, by phone, or by mail. There is a $119 lab processing fee, so the entire cost of the test is about $150.

What do you think about being able to do paternity tests at home? Does it have the potential to cause some major family issues? Or is this a brilliant idea that cold help answer important questions and bring families closer together?

Source

This Is . . . Awkward

GiggleSugar — Thu, 15 Jan 2009 09:00:00 -0800

An English Maury Povich Show aired their version of "who's the baby daddy," complete with paternity test results. To prolong the suspense, the host starts grilling the potential father (who has a habit of impregnating women willy-nilly) if he even knew how to spell father, to which he proudly demonstrated that he . . . did not. I can't tell when he asked the host "Are you gobsmacked?" if he actually still doesn't know he spelled it incorrectly. Sigh.

John Edwards Admits to Affair, Doesn't Claim to be Father

LibertySugar — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 12:25:40 -0700

John Edwards has admitted to having an extramarital affair with filmmaker Rielle Hunter, and lying throughout his Presidential campaign. ABC News will run the Edwards interview tonight, in which he admits to the affair, but says he never loved the woman. Although he has not taken a paternity test, Edwards says he knows he is not the father based on the timing of the affair. He also denies making payments to the woman, but says his friends or supporters may have done so without his knowledge.

The former presidential candidate says his wife Elizabeth and other family members learned of the affair in 2006.

Update: Following the news of his admission, John Edwards released a statement.

In 2006, I made a serious error in judgment and conducted myself in a way that was disloyal to my family and to my core beliefs. . . . I am and have been willing to take any test necessary to establish the fact that I am not the father of any baby, and I am truly hopeful that a test will be done so this fact can be definitively established. . . . It is inadequate to say to the people who believed in me that I am sorry, as it is inadequate to say to the people who love me that I am sorry. In the course of several campaigns, I started to believe that I was special and became increasingly egocentric and narcissistic. If you want to beat me up - feel free.

For the rest, read his full statement.

Source

Ask E. Jean For DearSugar: Do I Tell My Husband the Truth About Our Son?

E Jean Carroll — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 10:00:00 -0700

Dear E. Jean,

I’m close to losing my mind. This week I received the results of a paternity test. It confirms that my husband is not the father of our 10-year-old son, our oldest child. The news will absolutely destroy my husband and devastate our four happy children.

How did this happen? Three days before I married my husband, a guy I dated in college came over to my house, took me out to dinner, and begged me not to get married. Afterwards he drove me to the beach, we went for a walk - well, you can guess the rest. The wedding took place, my husband and I went on the honeymoon, and when we came home, I knew I was pregnant. Both our families were ecstatic. “A honeymoon baby!” they called it. But I was suspicious at the time that it could be either man’s.

However, I put it out of my head, gave birth to an awesome boy, 10 years passed, everything was fine. Then I heard the other man was getting a divorce and there was a big fight with his wife over money. His picture appeared in the paper. I looked it up. The resemblance to my son was unmistakable. But the worst part is the wife was accusing him of abusing their children.

That was when I decided I had to know for certain. And the results of the DNA samples (samples I took from my husband and son while they were both sleeping) confirmed what I feared: My husband is - I’m quoting - "excluded as a biological parent" of my son.

I'm a total wreck. It's like a bad Maury show. The truth will demolish my son’s trust, my husband’s love, my other three children’s stability. What can I do? How can I find the words? What do I say? I don’t know how I’m going to live through this. - Devastated.

To see E. Jean's answer, read more.

My Dearest Devastated,

I realize that most people will disagree, but I advise you to keep your secret. For now.

See an attorney. Draw up a letter containing the facts to be given to your son in case of your early death - and stipulate the letter is to be opened when he’s grown.

And, of course, if your son ever develops health problems that could be hereditary, you’ll disclose the facts surrounding his birth to your pediatrician and to the biological father if you need to obtain his health records.

But other than these two circumstances, I see absolutely no reason to explode this bomb at this particular time. When your son is an adult, you can tell him. For now, let the family grow up and prosper.

Because the truth is never pure and rarely simple, as Nabokov said, nor is Truth with a capitol “T” always a good thing. It can also bring evil. Just ask Oedipus.

To see more advice from E. Jean, visit Elle Magazine and AskEJean.com.