TresSugar

Do You Believe in Love at First Sight?

TresSugar — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 04:00:00 -0700

I am a ridiculous romantic, and although I've fallen in love with people I didn't initially feel more than passing interest in, I've also fallen head over heels in love with people the first time I set eyes on them. (So sue me. I'm a Leo.)

Some people would probably say that love at first sight is an absurd idea, but sometimes, you "just know," not after being with someone for a while, but as they catch your eye on the subway, at a cafe, or at the laundromat.

Do you believe in love at first sight? Has it ever happened to you?

Love: The Key to Creativity

TresSugar — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 16:00:00 -0700

Love has been the driving theme of artistic creations stretching over generations. Researchers from the University of Amsterdam recently decided to verify that love can change the way we think. The study found that love makes us more creative, while sexual desire makes us more logical.

Subjects who thought about a romantic walk with the person they loved performed better on tasks that required creative thinking. When asked to think about a sexual encounter with someone they didn't love, the subjects performed worse on the creative tasks, but better on logical puzzles. Scientists reasoned that romantic love makes us see things from a long-term perspective (which is good for creativity), while sex makes us think short term (which is good for logical thinking).

So now we know that love makes us creative, while lust might have the opposite effect. I'd like to add heartbreak to the list of creative forces. Without that we wouldn't have Shakespearean tragedies or Kanye's amazing song "Heartless."

Does love make you more creative?

Dear Poll: Do You Look For Romance or Friendship?

DearSugar — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 07:30:00 -0700

In order to have a long-lasting relationship, it's important to share love, trust, romance, intimacy, friendship, and most of all, attraction with your significant other. But since so many relationships end in divorce, you have to really think about what matters to you before committing to a lifelong union. Some people say it's friendship that makes a relationship work, but other say it's intimacy; which do you desire most?

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Group Therapy: Is He Just Not That Into Me?

Fri, 27 Mar 2009 04:00:00 -0700

My boyfriend and I have been dating for two years. I'm at the point in our relationship where I would like a deeper commitment, but he has already said that he doesn't want to get married. He blames his lack of interest in marriage on the current recession, but I feel like I've been misled this past year.

I graduated from college a year ago, and instead of going on to graduate school, we agreed that I would take a year off while he finished up his bachelor's degree. He promised that if I waited, he would move with me to wherever I decided to attend grad school. Well one year later, he says he doesn't want to leave his job and he still can't marry me. I'm hurt, and I feel like I've just been wasting my time with him.

We moved in together in August, but he hardly pulls his weight. He's become increasingly distant and less affectionate and I have no clue what to make of this. I'm starting to feel resentment towards him for not following through with his promises, but I love him - so what am I supposed to do?

[EDITOR'S NOTE: To read more GROUP THERAPY, click here or submit your own question here.]

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Tech Dating 101: Changing Your Relationship Status

DearSugar — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 09:00:00 -0700

Spring has sprung, and it's not only the time for budding flowers and April showers, it's the time of budding romances too! But with so much new technology out there, the art of dating has become more complicated than ever - we can totally feel Drew Barrymore's pain in He's Just Not That Into You when she laments about having to keep up with several different technologies just to get rejected.

So in the face of this uncharted territory, geeksugar and DearSugar are teaming up to bring you a series about love and the technologies that connect us called Tech Dating 101. We'll answer some of the burning questions you might have about both subjects, like our first question this week:

How long should I wait to change my status from "Single" to "In a Relationship" after I begin dating someone?

To see DearSugar's answer, read more.

Oh how I wish there was a concrete answer for this one, because I get asked this all the time. But as you know, all relationships progress at different speeds, so you really have to look at it on a case-by-case basis. If you're in a committed, monogamous relationship, I don't think you should think twice about changing your status, but before making any announcements to the world wide web, be sure you and your love interest are on the same page. If you're both willing to make the change, do it together and consider it another step in the right direction. Just make sure you're confident in the future of your relationship, as it could be rather embarrassing to have to change your status back to "single" a few weeks later.

If your guy is not willing to let go of his single status, however, you might want to reevaluate the relationship. I'd take his hesitation as a telltale sign that he's either not ready to make a commitment to you, or he's not willing to expose your relationship to his family and friends.

While this seems like a simple task, I do understand what a big step this is. At the end of the day, you're going to have to communicate with your partner and do whatever feels right for you and your relationship. Or, you could always take the easy way out and leave your relationship status blank!

To find out what geek has to say about relationship status, and how to tell from your tech habits if you're officially taken, head on over to geeksugar.

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Group Therapy: How Do You Know It's True love?

Mon, 23 Mar 2009 04:00:00 -0700

I know there's no right answer for this but I'm curious to hear everyone's point of view. So, to the happily married: How did you know it was going to work out in the long run with your husband? How is one to know if you've found, or have not found the "right" guy? I'm obviously going through an existential crisis with my boyfriend of four years and I'd love to read what it is about your relationship that makes you secure and sure that it's forever. Is it the little things? Did you "just know"? I need the inside scoop!

[EDITOR'S NOTE: To read more GROUP THERAPY, click here or submit your own question here.]

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Group Therapy: Why Hasn't He Tried to Have Sex With Me?

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 10:00:00 -0700

I have been dating this great guy for the past six weeks and things have been going really well. He is thoughtful, he always initiates dates, and he has made it clear that I am the only girl he is dating and interested in. We have a lot in common and we have amazing chemistry, but we've done nothing but make out. We've had numerous sleep overs and the attracted is there, but it's never gone past third base. I am not a promiscuous, one-night stand kind of girl, and I've only been intimate with people that I have dated, but countless dates later I am getting pretty frustrated. I have never had this problem before -guys are usually anxious to get in my pants - so how do I proceed? Am I just over-reacting, or is something else going on here?

[EDITOR'S NOTE: To read more GROUP THERAPY, click here or submit your own question here.]

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Group Therapy: Can I Still Find Love?

Wed, 11 Mar 2009 04:00:00 -0700

My boyfriend of three years recently broke up with me. We lived together and even talked about getting married, but one day he just came home and said he didn't love me anymore and that I wasn't enough for him. As devastated as I was, I actually feel it was for the best.

The problem is that I fear he was my only chance at love. I'm in my late 20s, in business school, and I'm the only single one left in my group of friends. Do girls like me get a second chance? It just seems hard to believe that I could find another man who would love me for who I am without coming to the conclusion that he could do better. Are there men out there looking for a nerdy girl who is not gorgeous, but who is a good person?

[EDITOR'S NOTE: To read more GROUP THERAPY, click here or submit your own question here.]
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Bed and Blackmail: Swiss Gigolo Swindled Wealthy Lovers

CitizenSugar — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 00:01:39 -0700

The richest woman in Germany gets seduced by a Swiss gigolo while away at a luxurious spa. As she carries on the affair, hiding it from her husband and children, the gigolo schemes with his Italian accomplice, who secretly films the lovers from a hotel room next door. The gigolo begs the unfaithful woman to give him $10 million to pay off a fictitious Mafia boss. Once she does, he demands more, or else he will reveal the evidence of her infidelity to the world. No, this tale is not taken from a trashy romance novel, but from a German courtroom.

Yesterday, Helg Scarbi, who's known as the "Swiss Gigolo" was sentenced to six years in jail, after blackmailing Germany's wealthiest woman, Susanne Klatten, and a list of other uber-rich lovers.

Klatten is the reclusive heir to the BMW fortune. She decided to come forward to authorities about the blackmail, and risk embarrassment. Because the seductive swindler confessed, he received six years, instead of 10. Does that sounds like a fair sentence to you?

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Do Tell: How Did Your Parents Meet?

DearSugar — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 10:00:00 -0800

I loved hearing about how all of you met your significant others a while back, and though some of your stories were very modern, most of you met the old-fashioned way, just like our moms and dads did. Since they didn't have resources like the Internet or match-making services to help them get a date, I'm curious to know how your parents met, so do tell!

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