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    Related: Love and Sex, Britney Spears, Divorce, Kevin Federline, Friendship, Ex
    12345…Next ›Last Page »
    1 of 17
    Where Do You Stand: Family Members Remaining Friends With Your Ex
    Mar 11 2008 - 9:00am Just yesterday, Kevin Federline and Jamie Spears were photographed playing golf together, weird, right? With everything that's going on between Britney and Kevin, I have to say that I'd be pretty upset by this "friendship" if I were Brit. I'm OK with remaining cordial with family members after a split, especially when there are children involved, but in this situation, shouldn't Mr. Spear's loyalty lie with his daughter?
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    35 Comments Post a Comment

    allourregrets's picture
     
    allourregrets [+]

    I think it depends on what kind of relationship he had with my parents while we were together, if they were super close then I wouldnt have a problem with them remaining super close. But in this situation..I never got the impression that Kevin was close with her dad, so it seems a little strange.

    1
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 9:31am Report Comment
    Kristinh1012's picture
     
    Kristinh1012 [+]

    I think it depends on the situation and the relationship before hand. Kevin has custody of their grandchildren and I'm sure that has a huge part in why they are so close still. Plus it's starting to seem to me that Kevin was kind of forced out by Brit and that maybe he really didn't want the relationship to end. So if my ex didn't do anything wrong and especially if he had my children I wouldn't be mad about them being close. OR maybe her dad has good reason he is keeping Kevin on his good side. Keep your friends close, keep your enemies closer?

    2
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 9:47am Report Comment
    Liss's picture
     
    Liss [+]

    It depends on the situation.

    3
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 9:48am Report Comment
    else411's picture
     
    else411 [+]

    It depends. Sometimes marriages don't work, it's not because the other person was horrible or at fault.
    Your love that you felt for that spouse/extended family member doesn't just go "poof" and dissappear.

    4
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 9:52am Report Comment
    almost famous's picture
     
    almost famous [+]

    H*lls no!
    If they are an ex then they're one for a good reason!

    5
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 9:53am Report Comment
    bransugar79's picture
     
    bransugar79 [+]

    I think it depends on the situation. i think in this case it's sort of understandable. i think both of these men (as odd as it seems) are looking out for her so it's good they get along well. Who knows after the dust settles maybe there will be a family reunion

    6
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 9:53am Report Comment
    cvandoorn's picture
     
    cvandoorn [+]

    Whatever works for them!

    Personally I would want my parents to support ME by showing that they're on my side and not on my ex's. Hanging out with him, doing activities with him such as golf, would show that they're on his side. I would be quite pissed off.

    7
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 9:58am Report Comment
    linb's picture
     
    linb [+]

    I wouldn't have a problem with it, unless the ex had done something very hurtful towards me, like cheating, or was abusive, etc. In that situation I would hope that my parents would not want to be associated with that type of person. But if we just grew apart, I wouldn't mind. I would hope that I could be friends with him, too.

    In Britney's situation, he's not just the ex, but the dad to their grandchildren - and right now, the one with custody of the kids. I don't see anything wrong with them playing golf.

    8
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 10:06am Report Comment
    mandy_frost's picture
     
    mandy_frost [+]

    Her case is a weird one -- what with children, a court battle, the media blowing it all up, and her potential mental instability. Maybe they played golf while talking about what is best for Britney and the kids. That's ok.

    Ordinarily though, I'd be mad as can be.

    9
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 10:17am Report Comment
    missyd's picture
     
    missyd [+]

    OH MY GOD I'd freakin flip out. Lose it on thier butts for sure.

    10
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 10:19am Report Comment
    aeschere's picture
     
    aeschere [+]

    i dunno.. kevin IS the father of jamie's grandsons. i think it's important to keep a relationship going.

    11
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 10:27am Report Comment
    Goody's picture
     
    Goody [+]

    whatever...if they had a relationship, just because ours failed does not mean that theirs has to be ruined also..

    12
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 10:27am Report Comment
    mooonnaaa's picture
     
    mooonnaaa [+]

    my man's ex will NOT go away. he ignores her but she STILL comes around and talks to his brother and tries to talk to his parents. ugh. MOVE ON ALREADY

    13
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 10:27am Report Comment
    popgoestheworld's picture
     
    popgoestheworld [+]

    I think it depends on the situation. I didn't think twice when I saw those photos. I was HAPPY to see some normalcy from that end. It didn't even occur to me to think his "loyalty" wasn't with Britney, simply because of a golf outing. So silly to get riled up over something that we don't even know the first thing about.

    14
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 11:03am Report Comment
    controlledspin's picture
     
    controlledspin [+]

    Kristinh1012 - I was going to say everything that you said Smiling

    15
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 11:06am Report Comment
    Jeny's picture
     
    Jeny [+]

    He's the grandfather of Kev's kids.. of course it's ok to stay in touch!

    16
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 11:08am Report Comment
    oh cecilia baby's picture
     
    oh cecilia baby [+]

    in certain situations, like this, i think it's acceptable.

    17
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 11:19am Report Comment
    aimeeb's picture
     
    aimeeb [+]

    I'm best friends with my brothers ex gf. They date for a fair amount of years and we went to college together. We had a better relationship than they did! So why end it?? They have both moved on and he doesn't seem to care her and I are still so close...

    I'm also best friends with my younger sister's ex boyfriend's wife. They dated about 4 yrs or so and broke up years back. His new girlfriend (now wife) and I met through a mutual friend. I think if the family member doesn't mind what's the big deal?

    18
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 11:32am Report Comment
    CaterpillarGirl's picture
     
    CaterpillarGirl [+]

    Its only wierd if they dont have a connection anymore, Kev and Brit had kids and thats thier grandpa, you must retain some sort of amicable relationship.

    19
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 11:34am Report Comment
    Sun_Sun's picture
     
    Sun_Sun [+]

    i really like my sisters ex, and hes been nothing but a respectful brother to me. plus they have kids and i live close to the father now so when he has them it can be easier for me to see them cuz we have a good relationship.

    20
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 12:04pm Report Comment
    ktownpolarbear's picture
     
    ktownpolarbear [+]

    i think it depends on the situation. in this case, it's probably a good idea b/c the custody situation and britney's mental health. it keeps the entire family on good terms, especially when the kids are involved.

    21
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 12:15pm Report Comment
    Asia84's picture
     
    Asia84 [+]

    if we broke up, and with good reason, i would be upset if my mom or dad went out and had dinner or played golf with my ex.

    even if there are grandkids involved. sure, you need to keep things cordial and what not, but WHY do you need to hang out together???
    the only reason to communicate is if it's about the kids and that's it.

    as far as Brit's situation, i think Jaime is butterin' up Kevin. it's that simple. they NEVER hung out before when Brit was married to the loser. in fact, that was why she became estranged from her family-because she married him. it is what it is.

    22
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 12:50pm Report Comment
    brown_eyed_grrl's picture
     
    brown_eyed_grrl [+]

    In this situation, I think the more stability and friendliness among family members of the children--the better. Maybe if Brit had it together I'd think this is weird, but considering the hospitalizations, strange behavior, etc., I think what's best for the kids is what really matters, and it's good for them to get a good feeling of the relationship between their father and their grandparents.

    It's different when you have kids. If they hadn't had two children together, I'd say it's wrong for her dad to continue to hang out with Kevin.

    23
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 1:52pm Report Comment
    Korsgal's picture
     
    Korsgal [+]

    my dad and my ex are on a fantasy football team together. It pisses me off. Show some loyalty.

    24
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 1:53pm Report Comment
    i am elle's picture
     
    i am elle [+]

    My family & my ex's family go to the same church, so it's inevitable that we run into each other & see each other at parties. Everyone's really cool about it & I love that we're all on good terms. I'm glad there's no weirdness because at one point in my life, they were like a second family to me. We're definitely not as close anymore, but I like to think we still have a connection, however small it may be now.

    25
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 2:46pm Report Comment
    girlgreen's picture
     
    girlgreen [+]

    ughh, my parents are so in love with my ex. and we broke up almost 5 years ago! i know. my mom invites him over and puts up our old prom pictures around the house for when he comes. i get really mad when i find out, but then my mom reminds me that i'm the one who broke his heart. it is definitely annoying. my dad goes to bball games with him and does guy stuff with him (having 3 girls, he's sorta like the son he never had or something). but he actually just moved out of the country so hopefully it's really over now.

    26
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 3:53pm Report Comment
    emalove's picture
     
    emalove [+]

    I'd be pissed if any of my family members decided to be buddies with an ex of mine, although I know they all know better than that. I'd certainly never do it to them either. I think it's disrespectful and inappropriate.

    27
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 3:56pm Report Comment
    rpenner's picture
     
    rpenner [+]

    Totally too many variables here to be able to make a yes or no decision. But I do think it can work. We don't talk as much anymore, but at one time I was still very close to an ex's mom, even after I'd moved on to a new relationship.

    28
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 4:03pm Report Comment
    Marci's picture
     
    Marci [+]

    I have a brother who has been married 3 times. Three women I bonded with. It's tough to give them up just because he gets bored and wants to move on. And he doesn't seem to care if everyone stays in touch, so at least it's not a big problem.

    I don't see this as an all or nothing kind of thing. It all depends on the people and the circumstances.

    29
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 5:53pm Report Comment
    aimeeb's picture
     
    aimeeb [+]

    Marci very true.

    It's surely not a black and white situation since not everyone had bad or messy breakups. I mean just think, Jen Aniston is still close with Brad's family.

    I think if you had a bad breakup then it could be a bad idea but if it was a mutual breakup and there was no blood I don't see the problem. If you bond with someone and become close to give a friendship up because two people part ways seems kind of well...stupid.

    I would never have a problem with it unless it was with a guy I had a bad breakup with. I mean it would be like, if I dated my brother's friend and then we broke up, should my brother stop being friends with him...uhhh no.

    So ya, I think there are too many variables for someone to say it's a "BAD" idea.

    30
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 7:04pm Report Comment
    aimeeb's picture
     
    aimeeb [+]

    Ooops "bad blood" not just blood.

    31
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 7:05pm Report Comment
    megln1022's picture
     
    megln1022 [+]

    in a situation like this i think its good they are staying friendly. they have a lot going on right now and being enemies would just add more to it. they all have the kids best intersts at heart and i think kevin cares about britney's well being as well. the better terms they all stay on, hopefully the more amicably everything is resolved and stays resolved and that is better for everyone involved! so i guess not specifically regarding ths case - i think if kids are involved especially its nice if people can stay pleasent towards each other

    32
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 7:37pm Report Comment
    snowbunny11's picture
     
    snowbunny11 [+]

    In most situations NO, but this one definitely makes sense. Kevin has custody of Jamie's grandkids, so they should be on good terms so they can coordinate childcare and raising the kids. Also, because of Brit's illness the more support she can get, even if Kevin supporting her is indirectly through her dad, the better. I am sure Kevin is interested in her well-being, and signs of her irrationality were probably pretty apparent during the end of their marriage, and maybe when she married him in the first place! Not to mention, Jamie and Kevin probably have a lot of legal stuff to talk about, and chatting directly is probably better than just doing it through lawyers.

    33
    Tue, 03/11/2008 - 8:15pm Report Comment
    Pheefs's picture
     
    Pheefs [+]

    My brother's ex ended up being my mom's house-mate!
    They were roomies for almost five years & I don't think anyone thinks of her as the ex anymore.

    I agree that it depends on the situation.
    If your family builds their own relationship with someone you're dating they shouldn't have to break up with them when you do.

    Unless they were a horrible jerk or something...

    34
    Wed, 03/12/2008 - 11:27am Report Comment
    cottonpoots's picture
     
    cottonpoots [+]

    This is reminiscent of the Jolie-Pitt/Aniston situation - just plain awkward.

    35
    Wed, 03/12/2008 - 5:51pm Report Comment

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