TresSugar

Money Buys Happiness in Today's Old-Fashioned Marriages

Colleen Barrett — Wed, 19 Jan 2011 12:45:13 PST

While Dutch moms say the key to a happy life is a part-time or no-time job, German moms find the same life stressful because they want to work. But there is a whole other type of stay-at-home moms in every developed country: those who stay, because they can afford to.

They've been called jet-set moms, spending days shopping in high-end boutiques, at life-coaching classes, and traveling with husbands on business trips. Despite college educations and former careers, they don't miss working one bit. In fact, when the Daily Mail interviewed three couples who've divided marriage into two clear-cut roles - breadwinner and caretaker - all couples said their divide-and-conquer approach was key to a happy marriage.

If a woman wants to stop working to raise kids or focus on turning an hobby into a job because she can afford to, I say go for it. It's what the men say that's so disturbing. They croon over how their wives (with the help of a nanny) arrange their sock drawers, cook their dinners, wash their clothes, and plan vacations that they just "turn up for."

"Sam is the perfect housewife. She doesn’t expect me to do anything domestic. She buys all my clothes, and makes sure that when I am at home, I can totally relax," said 38-year-old Scott Mullins. She "never calls me with problems at work - she knows not to disturb me."

That doesn't sound like a marriage - if a marriage is a partnership - but nostalgia for good, old-fashioned sexism.

What Is a Jet-Set Housewife?

Annie Scudder — Thu, 09 Dec 2010 10:45:27 PST

Teacher Frances Childs says the teenage girls she knows want to grow up to become doctors, lawyers, and housewives. She writes in the Daily Mail today that ambitious young women realize that educated and well-off "jet-set" housewives can actually have it all.

Childs claims American women would follow the lead of Dutch women, declining to work full-time and instead spending time with their children and enjoying hobbies, if only they didn't need two incomes. That's where the rich husband comes in. Not only will your husband's money keep you out of the office, but it will keep you out of the home, too, since you can presumably hire a nanny and housekeeper. Younger women, Childs says, "have realized that instead of spending the day listening to some bore drone on about sales figures, it might be more fun to go swimming with the children while the cleaner sorts out the house." She goes on:

Today’s breed of stay-at-home mother is impeccably turned out - after all, they're the only ones rich enough to be able to not work. Mostly in their late 20s, they're clad in designer gear and have the time to have their hair styled weekly at an upmarket salon.

If you ask me, jet-set housewives sound just like ladies who lunch.

Househusbands: Do Men Do Enough Around the House?

TresSugar — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 14:00:33 PDT

The third most important factor in a happy marriage: sharing the housework, according to a 2007 Pew Research Center study.

Yet many of the happily married women I know still gripe that their husbands don't do enough around the house. Or, they do enough, but only when they are told to. It's an ugly truth that the most liberated, headstrong women are loathe to admit.

Which is why I found this article about how it feels to have a "househusband" alternately encouraging and depressing. Writer Louise Parker begins by asking, "Surely no woman about the house would fail to clean the fridge for three months, only do the washing-up when it’s threatening to suffocate the kitchen, or scrutinise pieces of lawn mower at the dining-room table?"

Though her househusband has his strengths - gender-stereotypical talents like fixing things around the house - Parker admits he doesn't do as much housecleaning as she'd like: "the househusband is not, and will never be, a housewife."

To find out more, keep reading

Tell Mommy: Does the Term "Housewife" Offend You?

LilSugar — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 06:00:59 PST

I've never been a full time stay-at-home mother (except for when I was on maternity leave), but I was raised by one and feel the sting every time I hear the term "housewife" used to describe a mom who opted out of the work force to focus on her children. The SAHM mamas I know aren't popping bonbons on the couch and watching soap operas or scrubbing the kitchen floor with a toothbrush and playing bridge, they are educating their offspring, shuttling carpools, catering school parties (when a lot of working parents can't make it), not to mention raising the next generation. This doesn't discount the fact that many working moms do some of the same things. But, it's 2009 and the term "housewife" seems a bit demeaning and outdated. What's your opinion?

Desperate Housewives Series Finale: What Did You Think?

Becky Kirsch — Mon, 14 May 2012 12:04:53 PDT

After eight scandalous seasons, our time spent on Wisteria Lane with the Desperate Housewives came to a close this week with the two-hour series finale. The episode tied up some recent loose ends, like the murder trial of Gaby's stepfather, and also gave us a peek into the futures of all of the housewives we've come to know and love.

The episode had some series finale staples, including a death, a birth, and a wedding, and it felt fitting to see each of the ladies move on from their lives in Fairview. Still, I was saddened to learn that they didn't ever meet up again - not even for a reunion game of poker - but I'm choosing to believe that they at least kept in touch. How'd you feel about the farewell to Desperate Housewives?

Eva Longoria and Eduardo Cruz Take Their Love on the Go

Michelle Manning — Thu, 24 May 2012 11:00:35 PDT

Things appear to be going smoothly for on-again couple Eva Longoria and Eduardo Cruz, who were spotted catching a train together in Spain earlier today. The pair were all smiles and laughing while rolling their luggage through the depot. They're fresh off a stop in Cannes, where Eva was on hand to check out this year's film festival and chat with press as one of L'Oréal's brand ambassadors.

Eva and Eduardo are among the jet-setting celebrities who love to travel during the Summer. The pair visited his friends and family in Spain last year and even hung out with his sister Penelope, brother-in-law Javier Bardem, and nephew Leo. The end of Desperate Housewives gives Eva a break in her schedule, but she'll be back in the States soon enough to continue raising awareness for the upcoming presidential election.

Get a Peek at the Desperate Housewives Series Finale

Maggie Pehanick — Sun, 13 May 2012 01:15:43 PDT

After eight seasons of drama, lust, betrayal, and friendship, Desperate Housewives is finally coming to its end - that is, unless the gals of Wisteria Lane opt to do a post-series movie, a la Sex and the City. Of course it would be hard to do a movie if Bree is in prison for life. A possibility, which, by the looks of these finale photos, might be a reality for the redhead. As we know, she's vowed to take the heat for the murder earlier this season, relieving her friends of guilt, but probably landing herself in a maximum-security area with no baking tools for a very, very long time. At least the ladies get to play one last round of poker!

Bachelorette Breakdown: The Week's Biggest Whoa!-ments

Maggie Pehanick — Tue, 22 May 2012 09:13:48 PDT

Week two on The Bachelorette brought plenty of action, and I'm not just talking about the chemistry between Emily and Kermit - though that was slightly uncomfortable. No, I'm referring to the first one-on-one dates, the first group date, and all the poolside drama. It looks like we've got a veritable Real Housewives of Charlotte on our hands, only in this case the housewives are men and Botox is replaced by Muscle Milk.

I'm recounting the good times, and the especially bad times, from this week's episode when you

When Emily told Ryan they'd be baking cookies for her daughter's soccer team on the show's first one-on-one date, I was like, Whoa. No doubt this guy thought the only food preparation he'd have to do on The Bachelorette would be stomping his own grapes when producers flew him and his date to the scenic Napa Valley, and even then it would all just be for show and they'd get to drink perfectly aged Merlot by the fire while staring into each other's eyes. Not this season, buddy!
When Ricki showed up in the audience of the group date, I was like, Whoa! Wasn't the whole purpose of bringing the show to Charlotte so that Emily could still maintain some semblance of normalcy in her daughter's life? First she brings Ryan to soccer practice (but makes him wait in the car mere yards away from her daughter) and now this? (Side note: I kept thinking they should have rolled up the tinted window, lest Ricki see the strange man in her mother's car, but then it occurred to me that he might suffocate in the South Carolina heat.) Actually, come to think of it, watching your mom be the ringleader in a variety show starring the Muppets and a dozen suitors (one of which will be your new daddy!) is pretty commonplace nowadays.
Whilst lounging in the hot tub, Kalon let slip that he thought Doug "put being a dad on hold" to be on the show, and Doug was all, Whoa. Despite the fact that Kalon is coming off like a tool and clearly making no friends, Doug overreacted a touch and told him to "check it," but in a much more serious way. Kalon tried to interject, and again Doug was like, "Check it." I believe the phrase he's looking for is actually "Check yourself before you wreck yourself, bro." It also appears that Kalon is no longer "Helicopter Guy" and has now been given the nickname "Chopper," which the guys think is derogatory, but which is actually really cool and something I might try to get my friends to call me.
Meanwhile, Emily went on her date with Joe. The two dined at her local cotillion venue and put their hopes and dreams in the "love clock." After laying out his wishes to come back to Charlotte to marry her, Emily told Joe he wasn't the guy for her, and Joe was like, Whoa. It was brutal, but it was necessary.
After the loads of private time he got with her this week, Ryan still thought it would be kosher to monopolize Emily's time before the final elimination. He did this by writing her a seven-page letter and then making her read it to him out loud. It took 15 minutes, which is about two weeks in Bachelorette hours. This wouldn't be quite so bad if Taylor wasn't awkwardly waiting in the wings, caught in the unfortunate position of either backing down or breaking mid-letter-read. All the guys who were watching from outside were like, Whoa.

Did I miss any whoa!-ments?

Photo courtesy of ABC

What to TiVo: Tuesday

Maggie Pehanick — Mon, 21 May 2012 23:59:00 PDT

8:00 Dancing With the Stars (repeat)
9:00 Dancing With the Stars (new, season finale)
11:35 Nightline (new)
12:00 Jimmy Kimmel Live (new, with guests Patricia Heaton, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, and the winner of Dancing With the Stars)

8:00 NCIS: Los Angeles (repeat)
9:00 NCIS (repeat)
10:00 NCIS (repeat)
11:35 Late Show With David Letterman (new, with guest Will Smith)
12:37 The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson (new, with guest Billy Bob Thorton)

8:00 American Idol (new)
9:00 Glee (new, season finale)

8:00 America's Got Talent (repeat)
9:00 America's Got Talent (new)
10:00 Dateline NBC: 20th Anniversary Special (new)
11:34 The Tonight Show With Jay Leno (new, with guests Josh Brolin and Ali Wentworth)
12:37 Late Night With Jimmy Fallon (new, with guests Anderson Cooper and John Mayer)

8:00 Hart of Dixie (repeat)
9:00 The L.A. Complex (new)

What to TiVo: Sunday

Maggie Pehanick — Sat, 19 May 2012 23:59:00 PDT

8:00 2012 Billboard Music Awards

8:00 60 Minutes (new)
9:00 Jesse Stone: Benefit of the Doubt (new)

8:00 The Simpsons (new, season finale)
8:30 Bob's Burgers (new, season finale)
9:00 Family Guy (new, season finale)

8:00 Harry's Law (new, series finale)
9:00 Celebrity Apprentice (new, season finale)