TresSugar

MTV's Is She Really Going Out With Him?

TresSugar — Thu, 14 May 2009 13:00:00 -0700

Chodes, douchebags, tools - call them what you will, but for some reason, there's always a gaggle of women willing to date them and put up with their crap. That's what the creator of the amazing site Hot Chicks With Douchebags and - coming this Summer - MTV's Is She Really Going Out With Him? reality show found out the hard way. (Jay Louis explains in an interview that shortly after a breakup, his ex started dating a total tool.) Watch this awesome trailer for the new show and wait for my new favorite quote: "Every gangster needs a flatiron."

Extra! Extra! Douchebag Expert Answers Your Questions...

GiggleSugar — Tue, 04 Sep 2007 10:40:30 -0700

It's the moment you've all been waiting for with bated breath. DB1, the expert in all things douchebag and creator of Hot Chicks With Douchebags, took time out of his busy day baggin' douches and takin' names to answer our humble questions. (He chose the reader questions you'll see dotting the interview...) He does not disappoint, people. I suggest sitting somewhere quiet so that you can fully take in these answers. This interview may change your life...

GS: What makes you an expert in doucheology?
DB1: Practicing the art of the Douchestrological sciences requires patience, dedication and lots of hair gel. Only true douche experts can properly analyze the scrotological manifestations and
ramifications of the hottie/douchey coupling, and learn important facts like whether someone close to us loves us, or whether there will be an earthquake in Paraguay.

GS: What got you interested in all things “douche”?
DB1: The 'bag/hottie duality has long fascinated me for its incoherence and illogic. I live in Los Angeles, so witnessing the douchological implications of hot chicks cohabitating with uberdouche began to drive me insane. I began studying the phenomena in greater depth when I began my blog Hot Chicks With Douchebags about a year and a half ago. And yes, that's a gratuitous plug.

GS: Who gives you your pictures? Have you ever snapped any yourself?
DB1: I have gone 'bag hunting on occasion but nearly all the pics I feature are submitted by readers.

GS: What qualities does a douchebag need, technically, to be a douchebag?
DB1: There are a number of main signifiers of Douche Virus in a scrote. Obvious items like the 10 Degree Hat Tilt, the spiked up cactus hair or the Pink Popped I-Zod. But also subtler manifestations, like the Douche-Face or the "westside" hand gesture. My book, coming out this Spring from Simon & Schuster, will categorize all the permutations of Douche.

CestLaVie: Was DB1 directly affected by a douche and the event prompted him to create the site? We have all had douchy encounters but obviously a lot of time and effort is put into the site so the feelings must run pretty deep.
DB1: Yes, it all began when I saw an ex-girlfriend after a number of years dating a ridiculous low pants hanging muscle t-shirted uberchoad. The dude had Chinese lettering tats on his shoulder fer chrissakes. That alone was enough to drive me insane. That traumatic
moment launched me on my current path of spiritual douchesploration
and scrotological examination.

Bella: Can you speak on the phenomenon of the hipster DB? I am happy to provide anecdotal evidence if you need it.
DB1: The HipsterBag, an offshoot of the EmoBag and the RockerBag, is an increasingly disturbing phenomena in recent douchestrology. The HipsterBag works along a subtler douche pathology, utilizing harder to spot tropes than your traditional popped collar and spikey hair.
Giveaways include douchey facial hair, annoying ironic t-shirts like
"Free Winona" or "Free Paris" and, of course, the emotionally detached
douche-face that says, "I'm here but I'm not really here. Because I'm
too ironic to commit to actual emotions." Hipsterbags should be
pepper-sprayed on sight.

GS: Who’s the patron saint of douchebags?
DB1: The Patron Saint is the Holy Source Douche himself, Richard Grieco. But there are a number of primary douchebags including The Baio, The Kid Rock and The Federline.

GS: Has anyone gotten angry about the pictures you put up and threatened you? Or any amusing stories around this?
DB1: I occasionally hear from an upset choadbag I've mocked on the site via his girlfriend, who sends me an angry incomprehensible email about how he's "really sweet" and his faux-hawk "looks bangin'." It's my policy to always remove a pic if someone in the pic requests it. Because deep down, I'm a sweetheart. It's only my surface that's a bitter, angry alcoholic.

Phil: Recent polls have shown a third of douchebags can't locate the U.S. on a world map. Why do you think this is?
DB1: I blame the Iraq.

GS: Who do you think is responsible for this look? Whence “douchebag”? I’ve heard it’s been around since the 60s...
DB1: Well, certainly 1950s greasers were early douchebags, and there were many variations in the 60s-80s, but the modern 'bag pretty much showed up in the early 90s with Vanilla Ice, Color Me Badd, NKOTB and the rest.

GS: Who’s a classic cinematic douche?
DB1: Any of the villians in the 80's teen comedies pretty much qualify. I'd say those two guys in Weird Science, one of 'em played by Robert Downey Jr., are a great classic cinema example.

GS: Musical figure who’s a douche?
DB1: Rico Suave aka Gerardo. Proto-type modern 'bag.

GS: Why do you think some women find douchebags hot?
DB1: This is the question that plagues my soul and soils my britches.

CestLaVie: Through all of the scrotal study, do you think that any of the popped collar, white belt toting, "bling" wearing douches actually realize how douchey they appear?
DB1: They have not a clue. But they are barely conscious to begin with, so critical self exploration is not exactly high on their list of
intellectual pursuits.

GS: Is there a female equivalent of a douchebag? Or is it a totally gendered phenomenon?
DB1: Female douchebags are referred to as either "douchebaguettes" or "Bleeths" (Yasmine Bleeth, polluted by Source Douche Richard Grieco). More of this will be dealt with in my book, coming out in the spring from Simon & Schuster. Did I mention my book?

GS: What’s your work/school background? I noticed you referenced Lacan’s “Mirror Stage” at one point, which means you’re either a psychoanalyst or a grad student.
GS: I'm a part-time alcoholic.

GS: Anything else you’d like to add?
DB1: My feet smell like Gouda.

GS: Thanks, DB1!
DB1: May all your weekends be douche-free and may your hotties be un-Bleethed. Thanks Giggle!

Source & Source

Hot Chicks With Douchebags

GiggleSugar — Thu, 25 Jan 2007 04:00:00 -0800

You know how sometimes you see a really beautiful woman with a doofy-looking tool and you're all--wtf?! Well, this guy has decided to chronicle his bafflement on the highly entertaining site Hot Chicks with Douche Bags. It's kind of like Go Fug Yourself, where women tear down other women's outfits, only he tears down their entire beings. And apparently, it takes one to know one: he's the first dude in the pic gallery below. (Thanks, Geek!)

View 7 Photos ›

Headline of the Day

GiggleSugar — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 04:00:00 -0700

Chicks Sue Over Being Shot With Douchebags

Oh, man, this is rich. Three women hung out with douchebags in Jersey (no surprise), got their picture taken (again, typical), it went up on the awesome website Hot Chicks With Douchebags, and then in a book of the same title (surprise!). Well, they're not happy about it and are suing for psychological stress. Um, what about the psychological toll of hanging out with douchebags in the first place? At least author Jay Lewis called you guys hot chicks! (Does anyone else find it hilarious that the douchebags are silent, but the hot chicks are complaining?!) Ladies, you should be paying Jay for the wake-up call. Perhaps now you will finally step away from the douche, like, forever. Click here to read more.

Source

Ask The Douchebag Expert!

GiggleSugar — Tue, 28 Aug 2007 09:41:04 -0700

As the world's premier authority on douchebags (besides me, of course!) self-named "Douchebag1" of the awesome site Hot Chicks With Douchebags is ready to take your burning questions on all things douchebag--or "douchebaggery," if you will. I have my own questions he's diligently working on now (sample: "In your opinion, who is the patron saint of douchebags?"; "Why do you think some women find douchebags hot?"; and "Is there a female equivalent of a douchebag?")

The top three GiggleSugar reader questions will get an answer from DB1 himself--so hurry up and come up with questions by Wednesday, August 29th! Just add it as a comment to this post! It's that easy. (By the way, that's not him up there, and it's not Ashton Kutcher--who the heck is it?!)

Giggle Links

GiggleSugar — Fri, 07 Dec 2007 12:00:00 -0800

Friday's Douchebag Haiku. - Hot Chicks With Douchebags
The five least manly sports movies. - Cracked
Is It The Hills - or Shakespeare? Take the quiz! -Radar
Is this a new dieting secret? - 13gb
I can't believe they subjected that poor iguana to this. - College Humor
Ack! Kitteh iz stuck. - I Can Has Cheezburger
Would you tattoo a brand to your body? - YuppiePunk
Brace yourself for the ~~bastard~~ douchebag breakup. - eBaum's World

Word of the Day: Douchestrology

GiggleSugar — Wed, 22 Aug 2007 04:00:00 -0700

The genius over at Hot Chicks With Douchebags has created a new pseudo-science that might give a more accurate reading of a douchebag's personality than conventional astrology. Loosely defined...

Douchestrology: The possible "correlation between astrological readings and the various stages of the tilting of the baseball cap...For instance, 40 Degree Hat Tilt can be read as Douchini Rising, while 80 Degree Hat Tilt is the Dawning of the Age of Scrotarius."

Product of the Day: "You Are a Douche" Cards

GiggleSugar — Fri, 26 Jan 2007 03:00:00 -0800

I seem to be encountering the word "douche" a lot lately. Yesterday, Geek sent me a blog about Hot Chicks with Douchebags. Today, Dear sends me these Douche Cards. According to the site, if you hand out this card to "the asshole in question," you'll avoid arguments or barroom brawls. And how is formally telling someone in writing that they're a douche going to do that exactly? Maybe I should try it out tonight at my local dive bar.