TresSugar

The How-To Lounge: Asking For Help

DearSugar — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 10:00:00 PDT

Although being independent is great, if you happen to have a stubborn streak, your determination may hinder you from reaching out for help when you need it. For whatever reason, asking for help has become synonymous with not being tough enough, but I’ll be the first to say, that’s just not true. So if you’re one of those girls who has to do everything herself, read my tips for how to reach out for help when you really do need it when you

The How-To Lounge: Finding a Therapist

DearSugar — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 10:00:00 PDT

As you already know, I’m a huge supporter of therapy and often suggest it as a means of working through a specific issue - some problems are best solved with professional, and specifically, unbiased help. But finding someone who can meet your specific needs and whom you can trust is not an easy task. I’ve compiled a list of things to consider when seeking a therapist. To check them out

Help DearSugar Name New Kittens!

PetSugar — Fri, 22 Feb 2008 16:30:09 PST

How adoro are these two?! DearSugar's mom just added the lil preciouses to her family - the aqua-eyed Tonkinese made the trip up from Fresno and are now settling in nicely at their new home. The duo arrived yesterday but there's one big problem . . . or two, rather. They're so adorable that she can't decide what to name them!

To make it easier for myself, I'm gonna creatively refer to these babies as "one" and "two. " The feisty kit on the right ("one") is trying to claim her throne as queen of the household and prances around like she owns the place. But I think soon "two" (on the left) may stage an attack - this cat may be smaller and more timid, but she has a big, bold voice and is already meowing up a storm. So, as classy as my temporary names are, Dear's mom wants something a little more fitting for their beauty. Can you help out? If you've got name ideas, leave them in your comments below. I'll keep you posted on the naming process!

Dating Coach: Would You Use One?

DearSugar — Wed, 03 Oct 2007 13:00:00 PDT

The New York Times published an article last month about dating coaches. We all know that the dating game can be incredibly difficult, but some women are going to the extreme and hiring dating coaches for that extra push in the right direction to find their perfect match. According to the Times, dating coaches are very different than matchmakers, they don't arrange dates; instead they act as cheerleaders and advisers, pointing out less than helpful behavior.

Ms. Slotnick, a New York City dating coach, wants women in their 20's and 30's to devote at least 15 hours a week to the cause in addition to turning their "cab light on" so men know that you're in the game so to speak. Slotnick offers guidance on learning how to balance assertion and aggression, and whether to kiss on the first date, which she advises so the man knows you want to see him again.

Of course their services are pricey, ranging anywhere from $125 an hour to $10,000 for an entire weekend, but Lisa Clampitt, a dating coach and a founder of the Matchmaking Institute, thinks it's well worth it. “We have business coaches, dietitians, accountants, but we don’t have an expert for our love life? It doesn’t make sense. It is really the single most important aspect in our life.”

I know you will all have an opinion on this one, so let's hear it! Do you think it makes sense to hire help when it comes to your dating life? Do you think you would benefit from a dating coach and cheerleader, or do think it's just a scam and a waste of money?

Source

Wise Guide: on helping

DearSugar — Thu, 15 Mar 2007 10:31:00 PDT

We work on ourselves in order to help others, but also we help others in order to work on ourselves. ~ Pema Chodron

Can you think of a way you've helped someone that also helped you understand or get past your own personal issue?

Source

Putting It Off, Again: Procrastination Week

DearSugar — Wed, 07 Mar 2007 14:30:00 PST

Believe it or not, this week is National Procrastination Week. You might be wondering why I'm just now making a post about it, on Wednesday? Or you might have figured out already why the topic appeals to me, and why I'm writing about it midweek. Are you always thinking things would be different if you just got organized? Or practiced better time management? Or maybe you've already purchased a dozen different kinds of dayplanners, folders, files, containers and books, but you still delay finishing -- or even starting -- important and necessary tasks.

If this sounds familiar, click here to

If you doubt the effects of procrastination on stress levels, consider a study by D.M. Tice and R.F. Baumeister (reported in Psychological Science 1997, 18, 454-458). The researchers studied the effects of procrastination on health and stress levels among college students in a health psychology course. Although those who procrastinated started the semester with lower stress levels and better health than non-procrastinators, the procrastinators ended up with worse stress levels and health by the end of the semester. Additionally, overall, procrastinators rated worse stress levels and health than non-procrastinators. As the article states, "In the long run, dawdling seems to be self-defeating."

Great. Another habit that's bad for our health. But we know from our own experience that procrastinating causes us stress and anxiety. If you already struggle with anxiety, this is a behavior that will definitely interfere with getting it under control. And though it's difficult, this is one habit we can do something about. It will take a little introspection, however, because it's necessary to understand what's at the root of your behavior; not everyone procrastinates for the same set of reasons. There are lots of theories out there about why we do it: fear of failure, fear of success, perfectionism, boredom, anger, large tasks or lack of organizational skills. Online Organizing provides every kind of resource imaginable for getting at the root of your procrastination habits: they offer dozens of links for self-tests, strategies, solutions, tips. and worksheets. Just don't let researching your procrastination become another thing you do instead of that other thing you need to do!

Source

Website of the Day: Audible.com

GeekSugar — Mon, 11 Dec 2006 09:01:55 PST

If you plan on traveling this holiday season, but want to listen to something other than Christmas music or your same lineup, check out the download options at Audible.com.

Audible.com offers more than 23,000 digital audio programs - unabridged best sellers in genres like fiction, comedy, mystery, nonfiction, politics, self development, and language learning, informative audio newspapers, and public radio programs such as This American Life and Booknotes. It only costs $7.49 a month for the first two months and you can easily burn your downloads onto CDs or upload them to your MP3 player.

Lil Links: Potty Training in a Week? It's Possible!

Rebecca M Gruber — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 05:32:15 PST

How to potty train your tot in a week - Parenting
Ten questions to ask yourself before having kids - The Stir
Jennifer Lopez reveals her twins' nicknames! - Celebrity Baby Scoop
Steal pretty Harper Beckham's chic Fashion Week style - Celebrity Baby Blog
Your dog or cat can help prevent allergies during pregnancy - FitPregnancy
From low-tech to high-tech: how to make a baby - The Bump
What do stay-at-home-moms do all day? - Momformation
How children of celebrities deal with grief - Yahoo! Shine
Mess-free finger painting is now a reality – Child Mode
Your guide to getting started on Pinterest - Cool Mom Picks

Elizabeth Banks Talks The Hunger Games and Says Harry Potter Is "Scary as Sh*t"

Becky Kirsch — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 05:30:00 PST

I got the chance to visit the set of What to Expect When You're Expecting last year, where I chatted with Elizabeth Banks about fake baby bumps, motherhood, and the star-studded comedy. Naturally, the conversation also turned to Banks's other big upcoming movie, The Hunger Games. Banks discussed how she feels about the dark subject matter now that she's a parent herself, compared the film to the likes of Harry Potter, and talked about how she got into the role of Effie.

As a parent, did you have any reservations about The Hunger Games's dark subject matter?
EB: The movie is going to be PG-13, and I think that's about right. My nephew's 11, and he read it and loves it. The book has adult themes, for sure. Gary Ross, the director, and Suzanne Collins [who wrote the novels] did a great job patrolling what happens visually in the movie, what we can show and what we can't show. But I remember taking my 6-year-old niece to a Harry Potter movie with those dark shadow things that were scary as sh*t, and the guy doesn't even have a f*cking nose. That's like nightmare stuff, in my opinion. This is a lot of hand-to-hand combat, but it's nothing you wouldn't see on a video game or an episode of CSI. We don't have guns.

What was it like making the transition from The Hunger Games to What to Expect When You're Expecting?
EB: They're just so different, it's literally night and day. I don't have the same voice, I don't have the same hair, I don't have the same anything. Literally nothing, it's completely and utterly opposite. The good thing about this is that it's a role much closer to myself, so it's easier.

What helps you get into character?
EB: Well what's great about both of these characters, Effie Trinket in The Hunger Games, and Wendy, is that there's so much external stuff to build the character with. Effie has the great wigs and the crazy clothes, and the accent, and all that. That's all something that really helps feed you. And this character has the boobs and the bump and the back pain, and the shoes that don't fit, and all of those things that really feed you in the moment, which is great. It's a lot easier than having to come up with a bunch of emotional sh*t that you have to deal with from internally. They're nice characters that you build from the outside in, instead of from the inside out.

10 Apple-Inspired Snacks to Help Keep the Doctor Away

Jenny Sugar — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 02:04:30 PST

Eating an apple a day may not prevent you from ever having to see your doc, but they are full of nutritional goodness: one medium apple is 95 calories with 4.4 grams of fiber and 195 milligrams of potassium. The high fiber content keeps you full, which helps prevent weight gain, and also keeps you regular, which results in a healthier body. Crunching on an apple is good for your smile because the fruit acts like a toothbrush, cleaning your teeth as you chew.

Another bonus is that apples are supersweet, so they're a healthier way to satisfy your sugar cravings. Here are 10 delicious, good-for-you snack ideas, all made with the goodness of apples.

Shredded apple mixed into plain yogurt
Warm apple toast made with whole-wheat bread, peanut butter, and sliced apples
Apple slices drizzled with honey and sprinkled with sliced almonds
Applesauce mixed in cottage cheese and sprinkled with Craisins
Baked apple filled with raisins, walnuts, and a little maple syrup
Diced apples sprinkled with cinnamon and warmed in the microwave
Apple, peanut butter, and pumpkin stacks
A piece of homemade apple cinnamon cake
Slices of apple paired with slices of Cheddar cheese
Apple chips made with apples, cinnamon, and sugar (using this recipe)