TresSugar

Dear Poll: Are You Usually the Host or the Guest?

DearSugar — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 15:00:00 -0800

Since many of you attended, or threw election parties last year, I'm left assuming that you're doing the same for inauguration today. And in most groups of friends, it's usually one person who acts as the hostess with the mostess, so tell me ladies, are you typically the host or the guest?

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Handle This: Horrible Houseguest

DearSugar — Tue, 22 Apr 2008 11:00:00 -0700

You love your little brother, you really do, but his antics that were cute when he was 11 are less amusing at 20. Much to your surprise, Friday night when you’re about to go meet up with friends, he shows up at your door with his girlfriend and best friend and asks to crash at your house for the next few days as they pass through town.

You’re in a hurry to leave, so you begrudgingly tell them they can stay. When you get home, your kitchen has been completely destroyed by their cooking attempts, and they’re sprawled across your living room, which is littered with dirty dishes. You know they've only asked to stay a couple days, but you’re really not in the mood to deal with this juvenile behavior. How do you handle this?

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The How-To Lounge: Handling Guests Who Arrive Early

DearSugar — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 10:00:32 -0800

We all like to arrive fashionably late from time to time, but having guests who arrive unfashionably early can be a real inconvenience. If you often host parties or have friends over for dinner, however, you're bound to encounter some early arrivals.

The worst is when you haven't finished getting your house in order or you're still trying on clothes or fixing your hair. It can make you feel very frantic, but it's important to be a polite hostess and not let your guests know they are inconveniencing you. So whether you're putting the finishing touches on a meal or your makeup, I have some tips to help you deal gracefully. For my advice, read more

If you're not quite ready, gracefully acknowledge it, but don't make your guests feel self-conscious about arriving early. Try saying something like: "Oh, I'm so glad you guys are here. I'm just running a bit behind."
Ask them to please excuse you so that you can do a few more things to get ready. If you have tasks to finish in the kitchen, invite them keep you company while you finish up.
Meanwhile, give them a task so they're not just sitting there awkwardly. If your guests have brought a bottle of wine, invite them to open it, or if they have flowers, suggest they put them in water.
Or, if you need to finish getting yourself ready, offer them a drink and invite them to sit down while you finish up.
Try to relax. Remember, these are your friends, so you shouldn't stress too much. Feeling harried could put a damper on your enjoyment.

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The How-To Lounge: Being a Good Hostess

DearSugar — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 06:00:00 -0700

It requires a lot of experience and some serious patience to become a graceful hostess. A good girlfriend of mine currently gives us all a run for our money, and I admire her talent and her skills. Let's review a few helpful tips for throwing a great dinner or cocktail party and enjoying it, too.

Click here to read more

Be prepared for early guests!
When hosting a party, ambiance counts. I like soft lighting, candles, and it's best if the music serves to accent conversation, not overwhelm everyone
Flowers are always a nice tough to make your home look fresh and cozy
Being a hostess takes a lot of work. Catering to your guests, and taking care of the food and the drinks gets overwhelming here and there. Stay calm and collected. Take a 5-minute break in the bathroom if you need to center and ground yourself
Provide an assortment of beverages for your guests, including enough water and non-alcoholic choices, and stock up. When the drinks disappear, so do the guests
Introduce guests to each other. If you're secretly playing matchmaker, be very sly but do help spark their conversation
Set aside a place for coats. You don't want the couch turned into an eyesore in the middle of the room
Assign little jobs to your partner or good friend. This way you can concentrate on your guests' needs, facilitate introductions and not become overwhelmed. Delegate. Delegate. Delegate
Provide appetizers, no matter the occasion. A simple cheese plate on the coffee table will suffice
If you're hosting a dinner party, keep the cocktail hour short and sensible. Disasters follow excessive drinking before a meal
Parties should be fun for everyone, including you. Let the little things go and delight in the company of your friends and family

Enjoy your weekend, ladies!

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The How-To Lounge: Seating Your Guests

DearSugar — Fri, 18 Apr 2008 10:00:00 -0700

Figuring out where to seat the guests at your wedding is not a small task and can be a source of a lot of anxiety, but I'm here to offer some helpful tips on how to map out your reception seating. Regardless of the kind of dinner you have - sit down, buffet, or station - you have to provide your guests with a place to sit and enjoy their meal and good company. To see my tips, click here to read more

Don't start this project until you have received all your RSVP cards. It'd be a real shame to have every table perfected before you know who is really coming.
Know before starting the seating chart that it could take a few tries, so try not to get too flustered!
Since there will be guests at your wedding that you don't know very well (parents, friends, or new inlaws) you'll need to ask for help from relatives when it comes to finding a place for them to sit.
Be sure that every person has a place card. Even if you pick out who you want at what table, it's best to assign them a proper seat as well.
Regardless of the shape of your table, I always recommend sitting boy/girl. It looks clean and can aid in good chit chat. One thing to remember is that a rectangular table is best for conversation, space, and viewing the bride and groom and the dancefloor.
There is usually a head table at every wedding. This typically consists of wedding party and their guests only, but some couples opt to include their parents as well. While there are no strict rules, space is always something to consider.
You should seat other family and close friends near the head table so they don't feel left out.
People disagree on whether or not you should sit couples and close friends together. I happen to feel that you should never split up couples - you want your guests to have fun and to feel comfortable, so why separate them from their loved ones?
Since there will presumably be single people attending your wedding, it's always fun to have a few singles tables. This is your time to play matchmaker so seat "like people" together.
If you choose not to have a sit down dinner, or if the meal isn't a big part of your reception, you should still make sure there are plenty of tables and chairs for people to sit down, but in this circumstance, place cards aren't necessary.
It's inevitable that some people won't show, and even though it's in poor form, sometimes guests bring uninvited dates so always prepare for the unexpected. Make sure you have a few extra chairs and place cards on hand.
Know that your guests will be moving around throughout the night, but don't think this is because you haven't done a good job with the seating assignments. They're probably just being social, which is a good thing!

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The How-To Lounge: Being a Good House Guest

DearSugar — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 10:00:00 -0700

When you travel to visit friends or family, some people opt to skip out on the pricey hotel room and shack up with their loved ones. While some people enjoy being the hostess with the mostess, others cringe at the idea of having house guests so here are some good pointers on how to be a respectable house guest.

Click here to read more

It's always a nice gesture to bring a small gift when you're a house guest. A candle, flowers, a nice bottle of wine, a cookbook, home baked bread, etc.
The most important rule to keep in mind is don't over stay your welcome. As a rule of thumb, aim for a three day visit or less and arrive when you say you will arrive, and leave when you plan to leave. Even if you are adamant about your host pretending you aren't there, they will still feel obligated to entertain you
Try to just go with the flow. You might have your own routine at home, but while you're a guest, try to adapt with your host's routine for the sake of being flexible. If they like to have coffee at 9 instead of 8, deal with it!
Stay as neat as possible and always make your bed. You don't want your host to feel like they need to be your maid -- their home isn't a hotel after all!
If you are dining in, offer to help with the cooking, set the table, help with the dishes, etc. If you are doing a lot of eating out, offer to treat your host to at least one of the meals
Make sure to bring something to keep you occupied in case you have unexpected down time. A book, some work, your own computer, etc.
Always bring your own toiletries. It's normal to forget things, but don't rely on your host having lotion and shampoo for you to use, try to remember your own products
Before you leave, strip your bed and even throw in a load of laundry if you have the time. Remember to leave your area as neat and clean as it was when you arrived

Being a house guest can be really fun, a time for old friends to catch up and act like teenagers again, but if you are on vacation and your host has to work, be respectful of their downtime and bed time. Happy and safe travels!

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Grab Bag! How to Throw a Party Like a Lady

TresSugar — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 12:00:28 -0800

January Jones's disappointing appearance on SNL did include one funny-ish skit on how to throw a party like a lady. - The Frisky
Parents get warmer reactions if they reveal they're expecting a boy rather than a girl. - Salon
10 actors who look fierce in drag. - Lemondrop
Meghan McCain weighs in on whether sex tapes matter. - The Daily Beast
You won't believe what's in this dessert. - Glamour
No better training for politics than motherhood? - DoubleX
11 reasons to date a church-going guy. - Your Tango
This is the week of TV guest stars. Get ready for Lady Gaga, Heather Locklear, and James Franco. - BuzzSugar

You Asked: Should We Un-Invite Them to Our Wedding?

DearSugar — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 06:00:00 -0700

Dear Sugar,

I got engaged last November, and our wedding is set for Oct. 18. Last March, my fiancé's company was bought out by a corporation and in early April, the entire office was shut down unexpectedly. He was out of work until July when he was hired by a small independent technology company (and by small, I mean a total of seven employees). He was having a great time for the first few months; he really enjoyed his new boss, co-workers and responsibilities. During that time, we were writing out our wedding guest list and to be friendly, we invited his new co-workers and their significant others. A few months later, he became really unhappy with the company as a whole and is at the point now where he's going to apply elsewhere. If he finds something, he may quit before the wedding. So my question is this: if he does quit before the wedding, how do we handle his current co-workers that have RSVP'd yes? Do we un-invite them? Do we tell them that we still want them there but we understand if they change their minds? I have no idea how to handle this, so any advice you could offer would be greatly appreciated. - About to Wed Wendy

To see DearSugar's answer, read more.

Dear About to Wed Wendy,

Since you've already sent the invitations and some of the guests have already RSVP'd, I'd have to say that the right thing to do is nothing at all. There is still a big question mark around whether or not your fiancé will still be working at his current company come October, so worrying about the unknown will just add unnecessary stress to your wedding planning. If your fiancé does in fact get another job before the big day, it's not to say that his former co-workers wouldn't want to celebrate with you - just because they won't be working together anymore doesn't mean they can't be friends.

If inviting these seven guests really stretched your budget, and if they were just courtesy invites, do what you need to do, even if it means uninviting them. But Wendy, if you decide to go that route, understand that there may be some ill will toward you both. You don't want to burn any professional bridges - the technology industry can be a small world. Since these guests were taken into consideration in your original wedding count, I'd leave well enough alone if I were you. Good luck.

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Sex as a Houseguest?

DearSugar — Tue, 23 Oct 2007 11:00:00 -0700

It's not often that I have friends come and visit for the weekend, but I always love when they do. We get to hang out all night, talking and laughing, and when we're tired, we can just go to bed. Over the weekend, I had a friend from college visiting with her boyfriend. They were staying in the other room and when we all went to bed, I heard them getting busy and was totally grossed out!

So what do you think about having sex while you're a house guest? Do you think it's OK as long as you're quiet as a mouse or do you keep your pants on and wait till you get home?

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Cute Alert! Seagull Invades Newsroom

TresSugar — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 15:00:00 -0700

Australian newscaster Peter Hitchiner had to share the news desk today with a guest anchor who flew in just for the occasion. Oh by the way - the co-anchor happened to be a giant seagull. Watch and enjoy some live-television ridiculousness.