TresSugar

Hump Day: Where's My G-Spot?

TresSugar — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 10:00:00 -0700

Welcome to Hump Day, TrèsSugar's sex advice column. Are you confused about sex? Do you have trouble having an orgasm? Is there something you'd like to try but you're worried it's too weird? Send your questions to TrèsSugar, and our friend Dr. Charlie Glickman from Good Vibrations will offer his sound advice!

Today's Question:

"I have decent enough sex with my boyfriend, but I don't always have an orgasm. I've heard that if my G-spot is stimulated, not only will I have a better chance of having an orgasm, but that it will be more intense. Is this true? Where is the G-spot?"

To hear Dr. Glickman's answer, read more.

Let’s start with a little anatomy.

The G-spot is a relatively small patch of tissue that you can find by inserting a finger into the vagina and curving towards the belly button (upwards if you’re on your back). Many women report that the G-spot is much easier to find if they’re already turned on because it engorges with blood. In fact, some women and their partners find that the G-spot can go from impossible to find to quite prominent during arousal. So start off with something that definitely works for you and then try adding G-spot explorations.

The G-spot surrounds the urethra and some folks find that stimulating it can feel sort of like needing to go to the bathroom. You may find it helpful to go to the bathroom before starting out so that you’ll know that your bladder is empty. Also, some women have discovered that G-spot play can result in female ejaculation. While scientists disagree about female ejaculation, we do know that it’s not urine and is chemically similar to men’s prostatic fluid. This makes sense, since the G-spot and the prostate are quite similar. If you’re concerned about it, put a towel down first so you can relax and enjoy the ride.

As far as whether G-spot play will rock your world or not, I can’t make any promises. Some women adore it and would never choose to have sex without it. Others find it uncomfortable or say that it just doesn’t do anything for them. As always when it comes to sex, your mileage may vary so don’t get stressed out if it doesn’t do much for you.

OK, so how do you actually do G-spot play? First, it may be easier if your boyfriend is the one wielding the fingers. It can be a bit awkward to try to reach it yourself. Some popular techniques include the “come-here” motion, making circles, tapping, stroking, or the “windshield wiper” movement. It may also be more fun if he’s pleasuring your clitoris at the same time, perhaps with his other hand or his mouth. Or you could use a hand or a vibrator on your clit.

If you want to use a toy for the G-spot, try something with a curve or a prominent head since those shapes makes it easier to hit the spot. Here are a few popular ones. Or you might enjoy one of the ”Rabbit” style vibrators.

For more detailed information about the G-spot, I’m a big fan of the DVD The Expert Guide to the G-Spot as well as the book Female Ejaculation and the G-Spot.

If you’re looking for ways to increase your chances of having an orgasm during intercourse, you might find that some G-spot fun as a warm-up improves your odds. Even if G-spot play doesn’t result in an orgasm for you, if it increases your pleasure and arousal, that will probably make it easier to have an orgasm when doing something else. Or you could have a G-spot orgasm before having intercourse, if that works better for you. You could also see if using a vibrator or your fingers on your clitoris during sex does the trick. After all, 70 percent of women report that they need some clitoral stimulation to have an orgasm, so you’d be in good company.

Experience a G-Rush With the G-Thrust!

TresSugar — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 13:08:58 -0700

I've watched this commercial for the G-Thrust sex contraption a couple times now, and I refuse to watch it a third. The problem is, I am still not entirely sure what this thing does exactly, besides give you a "G rush!"

So the guy is supposed to strap something around the woman's ankles and then step on this thing and it's all supposed to help the woman control her angle and his thrusting so that he can hit her G-spot more easily. But even Hillary from Pure Fun (the company that makes the G-Thrust) says that it may take a few times before couples figure out how to use it.

This thing looks all kinds of awkward. And I just couldn't help thinking while watching it, these two people probably came to Hollywood to be big stars - and this is the gig they end up with! Would you ever try the G-Thrust?

What's the Deal With the A-spot?

DearSugar — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 08:00:00 -0700

I'm sure you've all heard of the female G-spot, but what about the A-spot? And no, it has nothing to do with your bum, although that's what I first thought, too! I'm actually referring to the Anterior Fornix Erogenous (AFE) Zone. It's an area inside a woman in between her G-spot and her cervix. It's extremely sensitive and should feel a little swollen, spongy, and wrinkly. When stimulated, not only does your A-spot help with lubrication, but it can make sex beyond pleasurable.

I'm sure you're dying to know how to get to your A-spot, so to find out, read more.

In order to find your A-spot, Dr. Chua Chee Ann of Perak, Malaysia, discovered the AFE Zone Stimulation Technique. In order to get there, your partner is going to need to use his or her index finger. It may take some time to pinpoint your money spot, but if your partner is continuously stroking the upper front part of your vaginal wall, it's only a matter of time before he or she finds it. Once lubrication begins, you'll know it's working.

This A-spot technique is recommended to be carried out every day for a week, for five to 10 minutes each time - I guess practice makes perfect, right? This technique will both increase natural lubrication (which is bound to make sex better), and will allow you to tap into an extremely erogenous area of your body which should help you reach some amazing orgasms.

Have any of you ever had any experience with your A-spot?

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Tips For Being on Top

DearSugar — Thu, 03 Apr 2008 08:00:00 -0700

When it comes to sex, there are many fun positions to try out, but if you like to be more intimate, you'll probably prefer being face-to-face. If the woman is on top, the beautiful thing is that she's the one in control, so check out these tips on how to make it even more exciting.

Since you're the one doing most of the moving, try varying your speed.
Don't just move up and down; try moving your hips in circles for a different sensation.

Want to know what else you can do on top? Then read more

If your man is quick to orgasm, tease him by moving slowly. Not only will this keep him from getting too excited too quickly, but it'll also be pleasurable for you.
Try different positions - it's fun to mix things up!
If you need clitoral stimulation, sit up and lean back so he can use his hands to pleasure you.
If you want your torsos touching, try using a vibrating ring - they're small yet powerful.

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A G-Shot in Your G-Spot?

DearSugar — Tue, 16 Oct 2007 11:00:00 -0700

Although there is some debate as to whether or not the G-spot really exists, I'm a firm believer it does, and so is Dr. Matlock, a plastic surgeon known for his appearances on Dr. 90210. He and other cosmetic doctors are so sure of its existence that they have been giving G-shots in women's G-spots!

What is a G-shot you might ask? Basically you have to spread em' as if you were going to get a Pap smear, and your G-spot gets injected with a dollop of collagen (yes it's a shot). It's the same stuff they use to plump up thin lips.

For $1,850, the collagen supposedly increases the size of your G-spot for up to four months and makes your lady business much more sensitive to all movements ... yoga classes, trips on bumpy roads, and bike rides never felt so good! As for sex, some women claim that the G-Shot gives them the most amazing, volcanic, multiple orgasms they've ever had.

I don't know about you, but I wouldn't want a shot of anything coming anywhere near my cootchie, even if better sex was the prize. What if I got the shot and had mind-blowing sex, then what? I'd have to spend thousands of dollars each year to keep up my wonderful sex life. Plus who knows if there are any long-term side effects. I think I prefer to have great sex the old fashioned way. How about you? Would you be interested in getting the G-shot?

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Where is Your G-spot?

DearSugar — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 12:30:00 -0700

The G-spot is named after the German gynecologist Ernsy Gräfenberg, who claimed to be the first person to find this area on a woman's body. For some women, stimulation of her g-spot is necessary in order to reach orgasm, so I want to know is do you know where your G-spot is?

Dear Poll: Do You Believe in the G Spot?

DearSugar — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 16:00:00 -0800

The all mighty G spot has been debated for years, but new research is saying that it can actually be detected through an ultrasound. Since some women can achieve vaginal orgasms and some cannot, the pressure to find the G spot has been a constant bout of contention for men and women alike - until now.

New research published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine administered ultrasounds on 20 women, nine of who claimed to have vaginal orgasms, 11 of who could not. The ultrasound showed that in those nine women, the tissues between the vagina and the urethra was thicker than the other women, which some are saying could be the G spot. On the flip side, some doctors feel that thicker tissue might actually just be a part of the clitoris, debunking their previous finding.

So as you can see ladies, the debate continues. Is there a G spot or is there not? What do you think?

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DEARSUGAR Needs Your Help: Is There Really A G-Spot?

DearSugar — Thu, 25 Jan 2007 14:00:00 -0800

DearSugar and Searching Sara need your help. She and her husband have always heard about the magic little pleasure spot inside of a woman. It's been years however, and they still can't seem to find it. She rarely climaxes and when she does, it's usually because they have had extensive foreplay.

Sara, from what I understand, the g-spot or the The Gräfenberg Spot is located behind the pubic bone and surrounding the urethra. It is inside the vaginal wall and when it is stroked, you may feel the urge to go to the bathroom, but hang on....if it is continually touched, it can lead to orgasm. Does anyone have any helpful hints for her? Here's more on her story.

Dear Sugar
I am at a loss. I have heard time and time again about the female g- spot, yet I'll be darned if I can find it. My husband and I have been exploring for years and yet, nothing seems to happen. We are both pretty upset about it. We have read books, articles and have searched online for hours trying to feel around.

I am almost 32 and am wondering if maybe I just don't have one. Sorry to be so graphic, but I love your site and I feel like your readers may be able to give some pointers. Thanks a million. Searching Sara

Hump Day: What Are Some Unconventional Erogenous Zones?

TresSugar — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 07:00:00 -0700

Today's Question:

“I would like to be a better lover. What are some unconventional erogenous zones?” To hear Dr. Glickman's answer, read more

Well, I suppose that depends on who you ask. After all, what one person considers “unconventional” is someone else’s favorite place to visit. But even so, there are some spots that not everyone knows about.

For the guys, men’s nipples are an often-overlooked pleasure zone. Some guys like pinching or twisting, but get a firm grip first. Or try sucking on them. Either way, start off light and slowly increase until you find the right level.

You could also spend a little time with his prostate. The prostate gland is found by inserting a well-lubricated finger into the anus and curving it towards the navel. It’s about the size of a golf ball, although much softer. It’s very similar to the G-spot so try stroking it, making circles or a windshield-wiper motion. Prostate play is a great addition to oral sex and it makes lots of guys’ toes curl. If you’re concerned about anal play and cleanliness, grab a glove. Some men worry that anal play is strictly gay; but remember, who you want to have sex with doesn’t have to have anything to do with what types of sex you like. (Expert Guide to Anal Play for Men or Bend Over Boyfriend are good references.)

To make your girl smile, give her clitoris or her A-spot (between her cervix and G-spot) some attention. It's at the deepest part of the vagina on the front wall, so if someone is on her back, insert a slim, curved vibrator or dildo and curve it upwards. If she’s face down, curve it down. Fingers can work if they’re a bit longer than average, too. There’s still some controversy about the A-spot and it’s not clear yet how much different women enjoy stimulating it but some women report that A-spot play leads to more vaginal lubrication and intense orgasms.

Quite a few women also report that perineum massage feels wonderful. In part, it’s because the perineal sponge is there. It’s a sort of, well, spongy tissue that engorges during arousal and it contains lots of nerve endings. Try a massage or using a vibrator there, especially during oral sex. In addition, massaging the perineum can help the pelvic muscles relax, which increases blood flow and can make both vaginal and anal penetration easier.

Of course, all of these technical skills and hot spots won’t make you a better lover if you’re not paying attention to your partner. Ask them what their favorite spots are and how they like to be touched. Some people have difficult describing what they like, but there’s an easy way to work with that. Give them two options and ask them which one they liked better. That can make it a lot easier to get the info you need to give your sweetie a thrill.

5 Tips For More Satisfying Masturbation

DearSugar — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 09:00:00 -0700

OK ladies, you might want to bookmark this one and save it for when you're in the privacy of your own home!

With that said, I know not all of you are in relationships, and even if you are, there may come a time when you need to, um, satisfy your urges. Like I've said before, I don't think there's anything wrong with masturbation, but I realized that I've never really talked about it in much detail. I've given you tips for enhancing your sex life with a partner, so here are some tips for reaching the big "O" on your own. Learning how to orgasm alone is not only pleasurable and a great way to relieve stress, but it can also help you figure out how to have an orgasm when you're intimate with someone else. If reading these tips makes you blush, it may make you feel better to know I was blushing too while writing them!

To hear my tips, read more.

Set the mood the way you like it. Dim the lights, turn on some calming music, light some scented candles, and make sure you're not in any rush.
Have a variety of sex toys on hand. They come in many shapes, sizes, speeds, and materials, so not only is it fun to try them all out to see which kind you like best, it's also nice to have an array in your nightstand drawer, you know, since variety is the spice of life!
Play around with temperature. Keep a glass of ice water on your nightstand and periodically dip your fingers in it, or cool off your sex toy in the fridge. Heat is also an arousing sensation, so use some warming lubricant, or place your hand on a heating pad for a couple minutes.
Water isn't so great for intercourse, but it can be outstanding when you're alone. In the shower, you can use an extendable shower head that has a variety of speeds, or if you have access to a hot tub, point the jets in your direction!
Find your G-spot. If you're not sure where it is, ~~Mapquest it~~ here's a diagram. Some women experience orgasms like they've never had before by stimulating this area inside them.

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