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Drunk Humor
Girls Just Wanna Have Fun: 13 Irreverent Cocktail Napkins
We've all seen beer posters and fridge magnets for dudes with messages like "The more I drink, the better you look." Well, there are a lot of cool cocktail napkins for the ladies — some inappropriate, some corny, but all funny. So sit back, sip your Old-Fashioned, and check 'em out.
Stranger Than Fiction! Man Arrested For Handing Out Cash
Why don't I ever meet drunks like this?
A 59-year-old British man was arrested at a Spanish airport yesterday for handing out about 52,000 Euros ($72,285) in cash and traveler's checks to passersby after having had too much to drink on a flight in.
Turns out he'd just received an inheritance, and "began handing out cash while laughing," a spokesperson for Spain's Interior Ministry said.
Middle School Teacher of the Year Drunkenly Forces Students to Dance With Her
Florida Teacher Accused of Being Drunk at School Quits
Why teach middle school students boring old reading, writing, and arithmetic when you can show them how to party like a middle-aged rock star? That appears to have been 42-year-old Tampa Bay resident Kylene Nelson's strategy when she got so drunk at school she forced her terrified students to dance with her and then ran to a nearby recreation center where she passed out on some outdoor chairs. Students report being horrified that Nelson appeared to have no underwear on while she rubbed her butt all over them.
Headline of the Day
Ohio Man Charged With Drunken Driving on a Bar Stool
You know it's time for rehab and that your brain is pickled beyond belief when you decide that your best means of transportation is a motorized bar stool you made yourself. You might as well just do what that drunk on The Andy Griffith Show would do: get wasted, and go to directly to the police station and sleep it off inside a jail cell. Someone called the cops when they saw this fool driving erratically in a "strange motorized machine" that turned out to be his customized lawn mower vehicle.
Cheap Booze: Real or Fake?
Hooch, booze, swill — call it what you will, but in this economy, some folks are putting the Grey Goose back on the top shelves and pulling down the crap. Can you guess which of the following names for cheap booze are real and which are fake?
Take the quiz
Another Awesome Training Video
In addition to the Oscar-worthy performances by Cashier and Manager as well as from the drunk dude and his embarrassed wife, there is something else noteworthy about this training video. Aside from suggesting that one should call a manager when a stumbling drunk asks you to ring up his liter of vodka, this video really doesn't train you how to handle anything! What if wifey didn't show up to drag her husband's drunk ass out of the store — then what?
Ruh Roh!
How much gin 'n' juice has this dude been throwing back on the beach? He tries to get his pants on, but seems to be having some trouble. It feels like a triumph when he finally gets them on and then you're like, wait.
Is Anderson Cooper Hammered, Too?
Has President Barack Obama's inauguration turned all of Washington into a bunch of drunken (but happy) fools? First there was Diane Sawyer acting like she'd had one too many glasses of champagne. And now in this clip, the usually composed and articulate Anderson Cooper can't utter a sentence without stumbling — badly.
How to Have Fun With Beer, a Truck and Some Rope
Who needs Great America when, with just a truck, some rope, a cart to roll in, and some Bud Light, you can create your own fun? You've heard of parking lot donuts, I take it? Well, this is the extreme version.
Diane Sawyer Gone Wild!
The elegant Diane Sawyer really let her hair down on inauguration day if these clips are any indication. I'm going to go out on a limb (call me crazy!) and say she was three sheets to the wind when she flirted with her co-anchor, called the children in a special kids' segment "teeeny, teeeny citizens," and just basically seemed very giddy. Go Diane!
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