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"I'm In Love With a Younger Man"

Tres Community — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 07:00:00 -0800

This post comes from our Confession Booth group in our TrèsSugar Community. Feel free to add your advice in the comments!

I've finally fallen in love. He is everything I have ever dreamed of. We are a perfect match in every way. He makes me feel calm. He makes me feel complete. He complements me in every way. We're on the same level and we are equals.
He's crazy about me and I'm wild about him. We've been together almost two years and he's the best thing that's ever happened to me.

He is almost six years younger than me and while I don't think about it, others point it out. I'm almost 30 and I hate feeling like I'm doing something wrong by being with him and wanting a future with him. Sometimes I just feel old even though he does nothing but make me feel beautiful. He's the most amazing person I know.

There's lots of great stuff going on in our community - join it, check it out, share your posts or advice in the great groups and maybe we'll feature it here on TrèsSugar!

Skip the Pill: Some Young Women Want to Be Sterilized

TresSugar — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 14:00:00 -0700

Kerry Balley, 24, is regular woman who knows she never wants to have kids. In today's Daily Mail, Kerry reveals that she plans to be sterilized before her upcoming wedding. She writes:

I can't bear the thought of being tied down, a dependable mother and stable. I admire women who do it, but I've come to terms with the fact that it's just not who I am and I would be completely hopeless at it, not to mention resentful. It's not really a decision I've made, I just know.

There is debate about whether women of a certain age, like Kerry, should be denied permanent sterilization. While some argue that healthcare providers should not help a younger woman do something irreversible that she might later regret, others, like the International Planed Parenthood Federation, say that each woman, regardless of age, should be able to decide whether or not she wants children.

Do you think there should be a minimum age requirement for irreversible procedures like sterilization?

Très Bizarre: Australian Brothels Offer Seniors a Discount

TresSugar — Sun, 04 Oct 2009 02:00:00 -0700

Next week is National Seniors Week in Australia. In order to get in the spirit, Melbourne brothels and escort services are offering a senior discount! Any brothel or escort aligned with Australian Adult Entertainment will be offering anywhere from $5 off, to a full 50 percent discount on sexual services.

A spokesman for the sex-industry group said:

"Many senior members of the community already use our member’s services, whether visiting a brothel or having an escort visit their place of residence, including aged care residential centers."

It seems seniors are more sexually active than younger generations would think. There's a growing movement for a "privacy room" in nursing homes, places where residents can do anything they want, including having sex. I guess they need somewhere to bring their half-priced escorts!

Ask a Newlywed: Can I Confront My Dad About His Girlfriend?

TresSugar — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 04:00:00 -0700

Conventional Wisdom is a different kind of advice column. Your questions will be answered by people from all walks of life rather than by advice experts. This week, a newlywed offers her advice to a woman concerned about her father's younger girlfriend. If you have a question, you can submit them here.

This week's question:

My parents have been divorced nearly 20 years. Since then, my father remarried and was then dumped by his new wife. Now, two years later, he is dating a young woman only 24 years old. I'm 21! I am glad to see him finally so happy but can't help but feel disgusted at this. At 52, he's more than twice her age. I hate the idea of my dad being the kind of man who schmoozes up to young women. I also hate the idea that my dad would be attracted to someone who could be a friend of mine from school.

Do I confront him about this and tell him how I feel? Is it even my business? Or is it OK for me to feel so awkward and awful about this?

Thanks,
21

To see the newlywed's answer, read more.

Dear 21,

It's normal to feel uncomfortable in this situation. In fact, feeling completely indifferent would be a more surprising reaction.

You should explain your feelings to your father in a respectful way. You can tell him that you are happy he has found someone, but that it will take you some time to get used to the fact that he is dating someone close to your age. Your dad might not be aware of how you feel, so if you don't tell him, he could remain clueless.

Since I don't know your father, I can't guess how he will react. I don't think you should expect him to change his actions or dump his new girlfriend, but he might say something about the relationship that makes you feel better, or at least helps you understand him. Either way, it seems that your family is important to you, so it is worth it to communicate your uneasiness so you don't continue to secretly resent your father.

Signed,

A Newlywed

Do Tell: At What Age Did You Feel "Grown-Up"?

TresSugar — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 08:00:00 -0700

Almost everyone reaches a point in her life when she finally feels grown-up. It could happen during a milestone moment like leaving home, graduating from college, getting her first job or during a more modest, non-Kodak moment like cooking her first gourmet meal for herself or traveling alone for the first time.

Some people can go forever without feeling like adults, forever stuck in childhood patterns or not realizing that there won't be a magic moment when everything is perfect. Many of us, though, can think of a period in our lives when we said, "Wow. I'm really an adult."

At what age did you feel grown-up? What made you feel that way?

Do You Have Friends of Different Ages?

TresSugar — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 12:00:00 -0700

We've discussed how old is too old when it comes to dating someone of a different age. Many of you seemed to think that at some point, a wide age gap can cross the line into creepy territory in the case of romantic relationships. But what about friendship - does age matter?

I've found that it doesn't. While our life experiences might differ, I really get along with people of different ages. In fact, the variety in experiences helps me open up and see things from a different perspective.

Do You Act Younger or Older Than Your Age?

TresSugar — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 14:00:00 -0700

This Sunday Mad Men was filled with people not acting their age. The show opens with a clip of "Bye Bye Birdie" being sung by, according to one of Peggy's best lines, "a 25-year-old woman acting like a 14-year-old girl." Is this a harbinger of things to come? Of course. It's Mad Men! It's also 1963 and the Beatles are about to invade, ushering in an era of youth culture.

Until the early 20th century adolescence as a category didn't exist. Children dressed like adults, talked like adults, and wanted to be adults. There was no in-between. Interest in adolescence and youth culture really took off in the 1960s, a time when teens and young adults developed their own style. Their clothes, music, slang, and even ideals were drastically different than their parents', and they were identified as their own group.

Now the Internet has changed everything yet again. It's given us access to any subculture we want to join, so we can be in the know long after college comes to a close. Ask one 28-year-old about her favorite music and it may sound like she stopped tuning in five years ago; ask another and she'll tell you what came out last week.

Of course, age is defined differently for everyone. Do you act younger or older than your age?

Source: AMC

Sarah Haskins: "Bloody Hell, I'm Old"

TresSugar — Sat, 15 Aug 2009 02:00:00 -0700

Sarah Haskins turned 30 recently - and she’s worried she’s “f*cked” because it seems that only ladies with short, blond hair represent products that usher one into old-ladyhood, complete with bladder issues and osteoporosis. She wants to still be able to walk with canoes, play with oranges, and feel 29 again. How to do this? Use products with dynamic first syllables. Works for me!

The Case For "Privacy Rooms" in Nursing Homes

TresSugar — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 11:00:49 -0700

If you fear growing old, here's one more thing to worry about: it's almost impossible to have sex in a nursing home.

An op-ed in the LA Times this week explains why "privacy rooms" - places where residents can do anything they want - are necessary if the elderly are to retain their right to sex. See, basic privacy is elusive in most residences. It's practically impossible to masturbate in your own room without a nosy nurse or aide walking in! Without a realistic expectation of privacy, no one will even think about getting busy.

Of course there are progressive exceptions to the rule, such as the Hebrew Home at Riverdale in New York. The Hebrew Home was the first nursing home to develop a policy that protects the sexual rights of residents. The staff there is trained to respect a person's right to express their sexuality, while learning how to respond when a person makes sexual advances toward someone with a disability such as Alzheimer's disease or dementia.

I wonder if the aging baby boomers will bring a full-on sexual revolution to nursing homes?

Source: Flickr User J.C. Rojas

77-Year-Old Gets a Sex Change

TresSugar — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 02:00:00 -0700

On Friday most of you agreed that 13 is too young to get a boob job, but can you ever be too old to get a sex change?

Renee Ramsey, 77, has become one of the oldest people to undergo a sex change operation. Renee says she's been dreaming of getting the procedure for decades and that she knew something was "different" about her since she was 13. After saving up money for the pricey operation, she finally went through with it after her second wife died.

Renee, who used to be Richard, was also a Green Beret weapons specialist in Vietnam and served in the US military for over 20 years . . . Don't ask, don't tell.