wtf

Health

Shed Pounds For Prom When You Ditch the Booze?

If the article entitled "How to Lose Up to 10 Pounds Before Prom" doesn't already have you thinking WTF, it gets better (or worse).

If the article entitled "How to Lose Up to 10 Pounds Before Prom" doesn't already have you thinking WTF, it gets better (or worse). Just to be clear, the article appears in the health section of the Chicago Tribune, not in the pages of Seventeen as you might have expected.

A couple of things have me scratching my head. The first being that it frames encouraging young girls to shed pounds fast before they head to prom in just a couple short months as a healthy suggestion. Along with tips to scale down caloric intake like "look for little diet trims . . . Eat one slice of bread on a sandwich instead of two, order a child-sized scoop of ice cream rather than a small, use less oil when you cook and switch to lower-fat cheeses," the article also gives this warning: "Beware high-calorie drinks." It continues, "Many dieters sabotage their efforts with coffee drinks, alcoholic beverages and smoothies full of fat, calories and sugar." Right. Practical tips for teens trying to lose pounds now include laying off the booze.

All jokes aside, I'm thinking teenage girls have enough in the way of body image issues, and encouraging them to eat sandwiches with only one slice of bread seems to me a slippery slope.

wtf

Is This What Bea Arthur Is Doing in Heaven?

A real, live person (we're 65 percent sure) is taking time to Photoshop pictures of past-their-prime celebrities and one type of food into a nature setting.

A real, live person (we're 65 percent sure) is taking time to Photoshop pictures of past-their-prime celebrities and one type of food into a nature setting. First it was the Selleck Waterfall Sandwich blog, and now it's Bea Arthur Mountain Pizza. What's next, Joan Rivers Desert Lettuce Wraps?

dating and technology

Awkward! An Urban Virgin's Dating Horrors

You think your dates are awkward!

You think your dates are awkward! Imagine explaining why you're a 28-year-old virgin living in New York City. Elma Baker — author of The New York Regional Mormon Singles Halloween Dance — explained to L Magazine just how wrong dates can go when you keep men at a chastity belt's distance. Especially when you're out with a Frenchman!

"You're a Mormon?" he asked, as soon as I arrived.
"Yes."
"Can you have ze sex?"
I was surprised at his candor. "No," I answered.
He looked at me in disbelief. "Well if you can't have ze sex, what can you do?"
For simplicity's sake I took my left arm and lined it up under my collarbone. "Nothing below here," I said. I lined my right arm across my knees, "Nothing above here."
"What about your armpit?" he asked, "Can your boyfriend do anything he wants to ze armpit?"
I thought for a moment, "Yeah," I said optimistically. "My boyfriend can do anything he wants to my armpit."
"This is good," he said, "He can stick his penis in and out of ze armpit, and if you grow hair it is almost like a vagine."
My jaw dropped. "Is it too late to change my answer?"

Can you top zes?


Source

Politics

Fiorina Makes Sure You'll Never Look at Sheep the Same Way

If you have three minutes and twenty seconds to spare, I would like to direct your attention to a new campaign video from senate candidate Carly Fiorina.

If you have three minutes and twenty seconds to spare, I would like to direct your attention to a new campaign video from senate candidate Carly Fiorina. We've mentioned Fiorina before when we wanted to know your opinions on her voting record — although she's running for California's senate seat, she never really bothered to vote herself. Well now team Carly has put out a new campaign ad that is sure to distract us from her personal civic engagement. She's calling out her Republican primary challenger Tom Campbell as a FCINO, or "fiscal conservative in name only," and using an insane sheep metaphor to portray this. The good stuff comes at around 2:20, but I suggest you watch the whole thing. I apologize in advance for the nightmares.

Humor

Flashback: One Never Knows When a Homosexual Is About!

This 1950s video warns boys to watch out the next time they are harmlessly "thumbing" a ride home.

This 1950s video warns boys to watch out the next time they are harmlessly "thumbing" a ride home. Watch for drivers who are too friendly, try to win confidence too quickly, or become overly personal, it warns, because "one never knows when a homosexual is about." Or, you know, they could just not hitchhike.

Love and Sex

Jennifer Love Hewitt Loves Her Vagina, Sparkly

After chatting about her "booty" with George Lopez last night, Jennifer Love Hewitt moved on to another part of her anatomy.


After chatting about her "booty" with George Lopez last night, Jennifer Love Hewitt moved on to another part of her anatomy. She was on the show to pitch her new book about dating, but who could have thought that would include the introduction of this term: "vagazzling." I'll let her explain:
"After a breakup a friend of mine Swarovski-crystaled my 'precious lady' and it shined like a disco ball. So I have a whole chapter about how ladies should vagazzle their va-jay-jays."

Um, what? That's one close friend. I don't think I could imagine anything more awkward than bedazzling your vagina — except maybe using the term "precious lady."

Kanye West

Your Favorite WTF Moment of 2009 Is . . .

If ever a moment left people asking WTF?, it was when Kanye West took the stage during the VMAs, stole the mic from Taylor Swift, and said Beyonce should have won Best Female Video.

If ever a moment left people asking WTF?, it was when Kanye West took the stage during the VMAs, stole the mic from Taylor Swift, and said Beyonce should have won Best Female Video. How rude! Even Barack Obama called Kanye a jackass. Not surprisingly 40 percent of you chose this manners malfunction as your WTF moment of 2009, making it the clear winner.

Don't forget to check out the rest of our Best of 2009 coverage and defend your favorites in our Best of 2009 group!


News

What Is Your Favorite WTF Moment of 2009?

The first half of 2009 was nearly devoid of major WTF moments, but things kicked off when Mark Sanford, the governor of South Carolina, went missing in June.

The first half of 2009 was nearly devoid of major WTF moments, but things kicked off when Mark Sanford, the governor of South Carolina, went missing in June. After he was found in Argentina with his lover, he gave an emotional speech and just last week his wife filed for divorce. In September, Kanye West jumped onto the VMA stage, right as Taylor Swift began her speech for winning Best Female Video, and said Beyonce should have won. Awkward!

In October, the big headlines were a runaway balloon and the Nobel Peace Prize going to Barack Obama, as he's about to move more troops into Afghanistan. Then Modern Family's Sofia Vergara made a rape joke on The View, and a couple crashed the White House State Dinner in November. WTF!

(Don't forget to check out the rest of our Best of 2009 coverage and add your own favorites in our Best of 2009 group!)