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Heather Shumaker's Renegade Parenting Rules
Editor's Pick

8 New, Renegade Parenting Rules From It's OK Not to Share

There are some unwritten rules of parenting that we just know to teach our kids (mostly because our parents enforced them with us): sharing is important, be inclusive, and don't hit.
by
It's OK Not to Share

There are some unwritten rules of parenting that we just know to teach our kids (mostly because our parents enforced them with us): sharing is important, be inclusive, and don't hit. But in this age of new parenting methods (Tiger Mom, Free Range Mom, French Mom, anyone?), a new philosophy is set to cause a stir on the playground just in time for parents to send their tots back to school. It's OK Not to Share, a new book from journalist Heather Shumaker, will hit stores on Aug. 2, and her self-described Renegade Rules turn commonly held household rules upside-down.

Based on the philosophy of the preschool she attended as a tot (and where her own mom still teaches), Shumaker offers up 29 parenting rules that all fall under the umbrella of the Renegade Golden Rule: "It's OK if it's not hurting people or property." With easy-to-follow instructions for following the rules — including tool boxes of sayings and actions for parents — the book is a manual for the parent who's had it with many of today's popular parenting styles. Here are a few titillating teasers from the book.

Children Need Conflict We're Not All Friends Here Love Your Kids' Lies Pictures Don’t Have to Be Pretty It's OK Not to Share Kids Don't Have to Say "Sorry" Bombs, Guns, and Bad Guys Allowed
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Do Tell: When Do You Stop Sharing Details About Your Sex Life?
relationships

Do Tell: When Do You Stop Sharing Details About Your Sex Life?

In the beginning of a relationship, it's fun to share your experiences with your girlfriends — like what you did on your date, if he's a good kisser, even how the sex was the first time!
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In the beginning of a relationship, it's fun to share your experiences with your girlfriends — like what you did on your date, if he's a good kisser, even how the sex was the first time! But there's an element of privacy one usually desires once the relationship hits a certain level. That time is different for everyone so do tell, when do you stop divulging those intimate details with your friends?

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Relationship Protocol: Sharing the Road
Love and Sex

Relationship Protocol: Sharing the Road

Relationships are all about sharing, from feelings to responsibilities.
by

Relationships are all about sharing, from feelings to responsibilities. But some things are not as easily shared as others, like driving. I’ve found that many individuals in relationships consider themselves a better driver than their counterpart so much so that they either demand to be the driver or won’t allow their significant other to drive their car. And all the way on the other end of the spectrum, there are the couples who argue over who should have to drive because neither wants to. Sure, it’s just driving, but I think it’s also an issue of control. So how do you and your boyfriend divvy up the driving? And who’s the better driver?

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Should You Teach Sharing?
sharing

To Share or Not to Share

One of my friends went to a preschool interview with her child where the head of the school said she does not believe in sharing.
by babysugar

One of my friends went to a preschool interview with her child where the head of the school said she does not believe in sharing. Claiming that children under the age of four are not wired to share, she doesn't think that kids should be forced to do so.

Tots can enjoy one toy as long as they please. When they tire of the object, it's free for another wee one to do what they will with it.

While this concept may work well in her environment with proper monitoring, it could be a recipe for disaster when the kid is surrounded by others who expect a little give and take.

What is your view on sharing?
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Do Tell: How Do You Feel About Sharing Food?
relationships

Do Tell: How Do You Feel About Sharing Food?

I think how you order on a date says a lot about your personality, but I think it's fun to share food too!
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I think how you order on a date says a lot about your personality, but I think it's fun to share food too! Even if you're not sitting side by side, leaning in close to eat off the same plate can bring a different kind of intimacy to the evening. Since I'm not a germaphobe, I'm all for this kind of dining, but I know people who wouldn't even fathom the thought of sharing food or utensils, especially with a semi-stranger. So how do you feel about informal eating like that? Do tell ladies, how do you feel about sharing dishes while on a date?

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Sharing Baby Names
Poll

Did You Share Your Baby Names?

When your belly is protruding, people tend to ask if you know the baby's gender or have picked out names.
by babysugar

When your belly is protruding, people tend to ask if you know the baby's gender or have picked out names.

Many parents don't want to share their selection for fear of rejection or namenapping. My husband and I didn't tell anyone our names before we had our daughter. It was fun announcing the sex, name and everything else at birth.

What are your thoughts?
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Do You Ever Share Your Utensils?
Poll

Do You Ever Share Your Utensils?

Here at the Sugar HQ, we recently got into a conversation about sharing utensils.
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Here at the Sugar HQ, we recently got into a conversation about sharing utensils. I personally don't have a problem with it — as long as it's someone I'm close to or whose hygiene I trust — but I know it grosses a lot of people out. How about you, do you let your friends or family use your utensils?

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Are You Into Sharing Your Clothes?
Love and Sex

Are You Into Sharing Your Clothes?

When I was a kid, my Kindergarten teacher had to make a special call to my mom to say, "Your daughter has a hard time sharing."
by

When I was a kid, my Kindergarten teacher had to make a special call to my mom to say, "Your daughter has a hard time sharing." It was so true. I coveted the princess gown in the dress-up area, I never wanted to give up the swing at recess, and I never let anyone borrow my crayons. I knew other kids weren't as careful as I was, so I put my 6-year-old foot down and vowed never to share.

I grew out of that as I got older, when I realized that if I borrowed my friend's clothes, my wardrobe almost tripled. We'd even go shopping and plan our purchases based on what we all liked, so we'd have one of each.

I still continued to share occasionally, but I learned that certain friends weren't very responsible with my stuff so now I only share with a couple of close friends who I can really trust.

So what about you? Are you into sharing your clothes? Will you only let certain people borrow from you? Will you only lend away stuff you don't really care about? Or are you done with sharing altogether?

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Dear Poll: Do You Share with Your Boyfriend?
Poll

Dear Poll: Do You Share with Your Boyfriend?

Before it feels right to leave things at your new boyfriend's house, you're stuck sleeping in his clothes and using his toiletries, but what do you do when you want to brush your teeth?
by

Before it feels right to leave things at your new boyfriend's house, you're stuck sleeping in his clothes and using his toiletries, but what do you do when you want to brush your teeth? Some people are really finicky about sharing their toothbrush when others, like me, don't really mind it. While I know it's not the most sanitary thing to do, ladies tell me, do you ever use your boyfriend's toothbrush?

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Kids Do The Darndest Things!
Humor

Kids Do The Darndest Things!

Girlfriend's getting her grub on with a big 'ole bag of chips half her size when the dude behind the camera asks to have one.
by

Girlfriend's getting her grub on with a big 'ole bag of chips half her size when the dude behind the camera asks to have one. She begrudgingly hands him a chip or two and when he asks for another, she decides to nix this sharing business and really stick it to him. I would normally commend a four-year-old child for knowing and using sign language, but...(BTW, is that a Chester's Flamin' Cheese Fry or her middle finger?)

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