manners

parenting

The Modern Mom's Guide to Everyday Etiquette

Manners in the modern age aren't just an issue for the "ladies who lunch" set — issues of etiquette arise every day, in every way, especially if you're a parent!

Manners in the modern age aren't just an issue for the "ladies who lunch" set — issues of etiquette arise every day, in every way, especially if you're a parent! As moms, we're responsible not only for our own decorum, but also for setting an example for our kids.

We were lucky enough to chat about the topic recently with Lizzie Post, great-granddaughter of the famed Emily Post and one of the authors of the 18th edition of Emily Post's Etiquette: Manners For a New World. Totally in touch with the "What's the right thing to do when . . . " challenges that moms face on an ongoing basis, we found Lizzie's advice to be incredibly useful and realistic. Read on — we hope that you find it to be just as beneficial!

Behavior Tips

4 Tips For Dealing With a Sassy Child

Verbal defiance from a toddler who is just beginning to test limits is relatively easy to take in stride, but many parents are unnerved when bigger kids talk back.

Verbal defiance from a toddler who is just beginning to test limits is relatively easy to take in stride, but many parents are unnerved when bigger kids talk back. As Circle of Moms member Amanda P. shares, it's not only irritating, but downright disrespectful: "My 7-year-old thinks he can smartmouth us whenever he wants, and that it's fine for him to be disrespectful, especially to me."

Seeking suggestions from the Circle of Moms community, Amanda asks, "What do you guys use for a disrespectful child? I don't want to sit back and do nothing only [to see] this escalate into something bad. Any advice?" 

First, take a deep breath so that you don't wind up arguing back, say our moms. Then, try these four tips for taming the sass.

parenting tips

7 Tips For Teaching Your Child Restaurant Manners

A trip to a restaurant can be fun family outing — not to mention a welcome break from making meals at home.

A trip to a restaurant can be fun family outing — not to mention a welcome break from making meals at home. But it's not always easy to get children to behave appropriately at restaurants. "My son will behave perfectly at McDonald's or any fast food restaurant because he knows he has to eat first before he can go play in the playroom, but when it comes to actual restaurants where you sit and order then wait for the food, he is a mess. I can't control him at all," admits Circle of Moms member Vanessa M. "My mother would have taken me to the bathroom and given me a good spanking. I honestly don't want to be that kind of parent," she adds.  

For tips on teaching young children table manners and restaurant etiquette, Circle of Moms members offer the following seven tips.

Keep reading.

parenting

10 Words to Avoid in Front of Your Kids

Out of the mouths of babes .

Out of the mouths of babes . . . As parents, we know that anything that's uttered within earshot of our kids is fair game for repetition. And while eliminating all of those four-letter favorites is a no-brainer, there are plenty of others that can be just as damaging. Here, the 10 words we suggest that you ban from your vocabulary in front of your kids.

  1. Hate: You might be talking about rush hour traffic, a line at the grocery store, or a bad commercial on TV. But when it's used to talk about a classmate, teacher, or birthday gift, "hate" can be terribly hurtful.
  2. Stupid: There's not much that's less appreciated than being called "stupid," and this is one that lil ones tend to enjoy repeating . . . again and again and again.
  3. Retard: A word that's so offensive, there's an entire website devoted to banishing it. If you haven't already done so, you should get on board and eliminate the R-word from your adult vocabulary as well.
  4. Gay: Unless your child is old enough to have a conversation about homosexuality, chances are, the word "gay" is going to be misused in a potentially hurtful (not to mention, incorrect) manner.
  5. Loser: With bullying at the forefront of most parents' minds, putting down someone's self-esteem is something that you, and your kids, should never be a part of.
  6. Dumb: See above.
  7. No: We know you're not actually going to eliminate the word "no" from your repertoire. But try to limit its frequency. It seems to roll off the tips of toddlers' tongues way too easily.
  8. Shut up: Make this a forbidden phrase now to avoid its overuse later. Tweens tend to enjoy overusing it at times when it doesn't even really make sense (think: "He asked her out?! Shut up!").
  9. God (as in "Oh my God!"): If religion is present in your home, the word "God" will be, too. However, try not to use it as an exclamation of excitement or surprise. Even if "Oh my God!" doesn't bother you personally, you never know when it will come off offensive to someone else.
  10. Bad: Like "no," it's one that's inevitably going to come up, but shouldn't be used excessively. Being told that you're "bad" repeatedly can be totally demoralizing for a child (or anyone, for that matter).
parenting

How to Teach Your Kids Gratitude

In this age of instant gratification, encourage your kids to learn and practice simple acts of gratitude.

In this age of instant gratification, encourage your kids to learn and practice simple acts of gratitude. Not only will it help build and improve their value systems, but it's also a great way to help them find more happiness in the everyday. Follow these five easy tips to inspire more thank-yous.

  1. Volunteer as a family. Sign up for a local food drive or a 5K dedicated to a cause. Make it a family affair so that your kids are aware of those who are less fortunate. Participating in philanthropic activities will teach them the importance of giving back and the joy in helping others.
  2. Give them a gratitude journal. Buy your children a gratitude journal and encourage them to write down what they're thankful for at the end of each day. Sitting down and thinking about what matters most to them will help to boost their mood and strengthen their appreciation.
  3. Be a stickler for thank-you notes. Invest in some cute personalized thank-you cards for your kids to help them get in the stationery-sending habit. Don't restrict it to birthday or holiday gifts, either. Prod them to send cards throughout the year for smaller, less obvious things, too — for instance, to a babysitter who takes them on a special excursion.
  4. Point out the little things. Encourage your kids to appreciate life's smallest pleasures by drawing attention to them throughout the day. Mention how nice it is to walk in the sun or sip freshly squeezed orange juice. By regularly identifying what you're personally thankful for, you welcome them to do the same.
  5. Serve as an example. Be the person who brings the hostess a gift and sends flowers to those who go above and beyond. Tell your children why you're doing it so that they learn about common niceties and understand the practice of showing gratitude.

Source: Flickr User Vistamommy

parenting

Should Kids Be Calling Their Teachers by Their First Names?

Growing up, my teachers would call class to order with a resounding, "Good morning class."

Growing up, my teachers would call class to order with a resounding, "Good morning class." We would reply in an off-key chorus of, "Good morning, Miss Hill." The formality of those classroom greetings was not lost on me, as most adults I met were referred to with a title of mister or misses. Over the years, I've moved beyond those elementary school greetings, and it appears many schools have, too.

Though most LilSugar readers told us they introduce their kids to strangers with formal titles, schools may take a less-formal route these days. At preschool, my son was instructed to call his teachers by their first names. Now that we are entering kindergarten, our class assignment lists Miss Lisa and Miss Jessica as his instructors. While I certainly understand the casual names are easier for kids, in some ways, I miss the respect associated with a proper name. Do you?

parenting

Holiday Etiquette For Kids . . . Parents Give Their Opinions!

Holidays have gone to the kids — and they should, right?

Holidays have gone to the kids — and they should, right? From tots popping out of their seats during meals to wee ones eager to rip open their presents, the festive time of year can be a bit draining on parents. We asked moms what is appropriate (and realistic!) in their homes when it comes to dressing up and saying thank you. Here is what they had to say!

  • Wondering what's in the big box can drive a child wild, so 82 percent of mamas let their children open their gifts before the adults do.
  • When adults sit down to dinner, they tend to lounge a lot longer than lil ones. Since children like to eat and retreat, 90 percent of mothers excuse their tots from the table and continue with their meal and conversation.
  • Dressing to the nines isn't always the most comfy option for kids! Many a dapper lil guy has fought the shirt and tie in favor of more practical clothes, but 83 percent of mums say kids should dress their best.
  • It's tough for a tot to sit still in church! When it comes to holiday worship, 50 percent of moms take their kiddos to adult services.
  • Small hands aren't very fast at writing thank-you notes, but kids sure like chatting on the phone. Sixty percent of mothers allow their children to call and express their thanks in lieu of penning them on paper.
parenting

Holiday Etiquette For Kids...Chime In With Your Opinion!

Holidays have gone to the kids — and they should, right?
How to Teach Your Child Manners

Holidays have gone to the kids — and they should, right? From tots popping out of their seats during meals to wee ones eager to rip open their presents, the festive time of year can be a bit draining on parents. We're curious what is appropriate (and realistic!) in your home when it comes to dressing up and saying thank you. Tell us!

Sex

Is Teaching Children to Be Traditionally Chivalrous Sexist?

Chivalry hasn't died, but is teaching it (in the traditional form) to kids sexist?

Chivalry hasn't died, but is teaching it (in the traditional form) to kids sexist? Eighty-seven percent of LilSugar mamas said they are raising their sons to be well-mannered men — the type who offer their jacket to their date or pull a chair out as she is seated at the table. In this modern world, should mothers also teach their daughters to extend the same niceties of holding the door and picking up a dinner tab since couples aren't always made up of a man and a woman? What's your opinion?

Holiday

Expert Holiday Etiquette Tips For Children

The holidays can be hectic for a mama — especially if she's trying to keep her excited tots seated during a long meal or from unwrapping their presents!
How to Teach Your Kids Holiday Manners

The holidays can be hectic for a mama — especially if she's trying to keep her excited tots seated during a long meal or from unwrapping their presents! We asked Lisa Gaché, the founder of Beverly Hills Manners, a company that makes learning fun for children, for her thoughts on realistic expectations. Check out her advice on everything from holiday attire to the gift exchange.