On the season two premiere of Our America With Lisa Ling last night, Lisa explored the growing underground world of amateur porn. And perhaps the most surprising porn entrepreneurs interviewed were the couples who aren't just together on camera, they're in committed relationships in real life as well. There were a couple of young parents who do porn to support their family, Tyler and Berkley, and a 50-year-old woman, Ciara, who performs while her husband of 20 years, Patrick, films her. But does the couple who creates porn together stay together?
For Tyler and Berkley, who film themselves having sex together five nights a week, the money they get from their online amateur porn (about $1,000 a week) goes toward supporting their toddler and is a means to an end. But they admit that they've stopped having sex outside of work because their night job is a "sex killer." And they hope by the time their daughter is old enough to ask questions they'll have moved on. In their case, creating porn seems to be a drain on their relationship and probably not the healthiest environment for raising a family.
Ciara and Patrick, on the other hand, say that since they've started their porn business a year ago their relationship in the bedroom has gotten better, and that they are now more open to trying new things. Patrick seems to really love filming and photographing his wife, and she loves getting in touch with her sexy side. The only downside? Their family and friends have no idea what they're doing behind closed doors, and now that the show has exposed the truth, they don't know if they'll be accepted by their loved ones.
If you were desperate for cash, or just looking to spice things up in your relationship, would you ever consider filming you and your partner having sex for money?
This week's confession comes from our anonymous Confession Booth group in the TrèsSugar Community. Weigh in with your advice below.
The other night when we were talking on the phone (as we usually do before bed), my BF was really quiet and wasn't saying a lot. All of a sudden I heard a girl moaning in the background, then it quickly shut off. There was this really intense silence, and then all of a sudden he was talking about anything and everything. I didn't say anything because it was really awkward and weird . . . but I couldn't and still can't stop feeling upset, almost angry by it. I know most men watch porn, but why does he have to watch it with me on the phone? Like what is that about? We have a good sex life but now I can't help but feel even more self-conscious and ugly than I already do. How would you guys feel in this situation?
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This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!
My boyfriend has always been a bit critical of me in several aspects. But he'd never given me anything but praise sexually. That is, until now. You see, he has a new job and because of that we have less time for each other, and of course, that means less time for sex. But when we see each other we have a LOT of sex. And I'm no prude, I'm up for anything he wants (except threesomes). So I always do my best to pleasure him.
Last week things were a bit rocky and we didn't see each other much. But when we hung out during the weekend, we almost had sex and nothing else. So today when he complained that I didn't make enough of an effort to pleasure him, you can imagine how hurt I felt. I would get it if it was my job taking up more time, but it's not. I would get it if I turned down sex all the time, but I don't. I would even get it if I only wanted vanilla sex, but I don't! I would get if I acted as if sex is a chore, but I DON'T!
He also said that because of it, he's been watching porn. Which is another issue I have . . . you see I'm not very confident in my body (ugly face, small boobs and cellulite), and I remember when I asked him what he thought about porn stars compared to normal women, and he said of course porn stars are hotter. I asked him if he thought they were hotter than me and he said yes. He's also made some comments about my small boobs and cellulite without being asked. So to me, yes it's a bit of an issue. I know some of you don't mind porn at all in a relationship, and I guess I'd be more flexible if he hadn't been such an ass about the topic before. I also know for a fact that since he's the very jealous type, he'd be pretty angry if I got off to other men and if I told him that they are hotter than him (which I don't because in all honesty porn does nothing for me).
Keep reading to help this girl out with your advice!
This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!
My boyfriend and I have been together for five years, and we have a good relationship. There is just one aspect that bothers me. We are a young couple, me in my 20s and he in his early 30s. We usually have sex three times a week. For the past week or so, we haven't had sex and I know that he has masturbated to porn.
We use condoms and we are now out of them. My boyfriend does not want me to take oral contraceptives and usually he is the one who purchases condoms. This time he hasn't bought any. He seems loving and wants to be close to me at home, so nothing unusual. I just don't understand why he would rather be treating himself to porn than having sex with me, and why he hasn't bought any condoms?
I don't know if I should talk to him about it or should I wait? It bothers me to think that my boyfriend would prefer porn to sex with me. I would appreciate any advice or suggestions on what I should do.
Thanks!
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James Franco is getting in touch with his sexy side, first talking about a sex tape and now a porn movie. James is slated to star in Cherry as a lawyer with a cocaine addiction who gets involved with a girl in the porn industry. Hollywood has been bitten by the adult film industry bug, with not one, but two biopics on porn star Linda Lovelace in the works. Let's take a look at the stars who've played the down and dirty roles, and the ones who have porn flicks on the way.
Kids are growing up too fast; 20-somethings aren't growing up fast enough. We'll never win, but there's no ignoring the Internet has added unprecedented access to information previous generations had to put much more effort into finding. But now teen girls aren't just accessing the content, they're creating it by posting sexualized photos of themselves online.
I'm not surprised that it's happening, but I am surprised by why, at least in some cases. Reporter Alex Morris of New York magazine talked to New York City teens for several months. He particularly looked into why girls post promiscuous photos of themselves, and the title of his article says it all: "They Know What Boys Want."
Yes, it's all for the boys, or the attention from boys. One girl did it just to provoke jealousy from her boyfriend. And though she wouldn't take it down for him, she loved that he cared enough to ask. Consistently, the girls Morris spoke to say the Internet affects what boys expect.
The average age of first exposure to Internet porn is 11 — one 13-year-old even said he's not as into it as he used to be — and the girls Morris spoke to seem wary of boys because of it. "Basically, with certain guys, they'll see something on the Internet and then they'll want their girlfriend to do it," said one. While another said, "It can make them perverts at a younger age."
It's reached the point where girls say this porn obsession is a "middle-school stage" that boys will outgrow by high school. While that sounds unlikely, there is some hope: almost every teen Morris spoke to recognizes they are the first generation to never know life without the Internet, and it's been a blessing and a curse. "I think kids kind of mature more because they have computers," says one girl. "Sometimes it can be a good thing, and sometimes it can be a bad thing."
"Anybody who has made a home sex tape knows what feels best doesn't always look best. I remember when I was 19 doing that, and then watching it back and thinking, 'Oh, that looks horrible.' So you have a lot of respect for those actors in pornography, because they are really not just doing it, they're really selling it!"
— Oscar-nominated actor James Franco says he respects the acting of porn stars. He also reveals that in addition to soap opera star, Oscar host, drag queen, and grad student, he can add sex tape star to his résumé.
"Controversial" is not a strong enough word to describe a Czech immigration policy that requires gay asylum seekers to watch straight porn while having the blood flow to their penis monitored. If they become aroused, residency is denied. The test is beyond problematic (what if they're aroused by the naked man?) and also irrelevant because how your penis reacts to porn doesn't change the fact that your perceived or self-identified homosexuality may cause you danger back home. That's what officials should be looking at.
Unsurprisingly, the "phallometric tests" have received backlash from EU human rights groups, and some countries are refusing to deport asylum seekers to the Czech Republic. What's next? Perhaps they'll want to witness immigrants consummate their marriages to verify they're not shams!
