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10 Most Shocking Breakups of 2012

We're happy to present this story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, we look at the tough year on love in Hollywood.

Every year, celebrities pop out babies, pop the question, and surprise us with their random hookups, but this year in particular saw a lot of heartbreak in Hollywood. From Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes to Seal and Heidi Klum, it seemed like even the strongest couples were parting ways. And as fans, it was tough to handle! Who could have predicted the Kristen Stewart cheating scandal?! Not Twihards, that's for sure! So let's take a look back at this year's most jaw-dropping breakups and hope some of these couples find their way back to one another!

— Sharon Tharp

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7 Celebrity BFFs We Wish We Were Friends With

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, we look at the Hollywood stars who have found true friendships on and off the red carpet.

Celebrity BFFs are just like you and your bestie, except instead of catching up over lunch and shopping at the mall, they're buying designer couture gowns, going on double dates with their millionaire husbands and attending ritzy awards ceremonies together. But hey, the love is still the same, right?

Just this week, paparazzi spotted Mindy Kaling and Reese Witherspoon on a lunch date together in sunny California. With the smart and sassy Mindy and the down-to-earth sweetheart Reese, wouldn't you love to be in that circle of BFFs? From Tina Fey and Amy Poehler to Jennifer Aniston and Courteney Cox, check out these friendships we wish we were part of.

— Allie Churchill

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3 Signs Your Online Date Isn't Single

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, we learn to spot online daters who may already be in a relationship, and save yourself heartache.

You've joined an online dating site and are excited to meet new people and explore possibilities. Finally, you discover one person in particular with whom you have a lot in common and feel that wonderful bubbly sensation of looking forward to meeting and deepening the relationship. Yet, you begin to notice a few things.

  1. Your date avoids communicating evenings or on the weekends. You notice that your date only seems to talk to you during the week, or while in transit during travels (e.g. while at airports or hotels). If your date consistently stops texting, emailing, Skyping, etc. on the weekends or evenings then reappears during the week or during the day, that date could be a person who is married or involved.

    Often times, people who are married or are otherwise attached will avoid communicating when their partners are around, usually evenings or weekends. People who are truly unattached and available will usually communicate equally on the weekends and evenings compared to communications during other times.

  2. Your date gives mixed messages. He drops out of communication for stretches of time yet still expresses interest or desire for you. Usually when people cheat, they are racked with guilt. They may love the excitement and adventure of pursuing someone outside of their relationship, yet they may also feel awful that they are cheating on a partner.

    This conflict often manifests as the behaviors of pulling away from the new person for a while, returning to the existing marriage or relationship only to discover that there is still unhappiness, then reaching back out to the new person again. A person involved in another relationship might say to you, "Oh I've just had a lot of work or have a lot on my plate so have been a bit out of touch but let me make up for that — let's plan a romantic weekend get away!"

    It's true that everyone gets busy from time to time, but the way to tell if someone is truly busy and not distancing because of conflicts about cheating, is to look at the frequency of this distancing behavior. If it is happening on a regular basis and is more the trend than the exception in the relationship, this is not a good sign. Dating partners who are truly single will progress a relationship in a way that is consistently forward moving such that communication and interactions are happening in a way that does not swing between being distant and unavailable to being passionate and romantic.

    Also, some people, who are in relationships but are unhappy, use online single sites to create fantasy relationships as a diversion. When they realize that they are talking to a person who is the real deal, single, sincere and serious about finding a nice person to date, they then may pull back (especially if they have a conscience and want to avoid hurting you).

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: 3 Signs Your Online Date Isn't Single

— D Kay Hutchinson

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6 Simple Ways to Say Thank You to Loved Ones

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Even small expressions of gratitude can go a long way.


You can express gratitude in small ways each day of your life. Expressing gratitude is a spiritual practice that serves as an instant remedy for the bad habit of taking your spouse or loved ones for granted.

Showing gratitude can make a relationship of twenty years feel like it started last week. So, try these six simple ways of expressing gratitude to your spouse:

  1. Random acts of kindness. Bring his favorite food home on random evenings after work or bring her flowers when you make a grocery run when there is no special occasion. These sorts of gifts cost little money (unless your spouse has very expensive taste in food or flowers), but the splash of sunshine at an unexpected time of year makes it an even more special "thank you" in many ways.
  2. Love notes. Leave a little note where you know he/she will see it saying, "Thank you for everything that you do to make our lives better." This costs even less than flowers and only takes a moment, but the very simple nature of the act makes it all the more meaningful.
  3. Questions. Life is so busy, it is important to take time in the evening to ask how your spouse's day was. This shows that you acknowledge his/her effort to help keep your family and relationship healthy.
  4. Thanks and hugs. When your spouse does something like helping the kids do homework after already working a full day, try to make him/her feel appreciated immediately by thanking him/her either verbally or with a hug. Tell him/her that he/she is amazing with the kids.
  5. Chores. You can do one of the chores that your spouse always does to show that you notice the job he/she does every day. It will remind him/her that he/she is not slaving away unnoticed by you. Sometimes, doing the same routine chores day in and day out without any recognition can build resentment. Gratitude diffuses resentment before it has a chance to develop.

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: 6 Simple Ways to Say Thank You to Loved Ones

— Mindy Fox

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David Petraeus Affair: Do Some Careers Make Us Likely to Cheat?

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. The CIA director resigns amid an extramarital affair. Coincidence — or was the writing on the wall?

It was quite the week: a massive hurricane hit the East Coast, a fierce election came to an end and now this: America's sweetheart CIA director, General David Petraeus, resigns for "personal reasons" (ahem, cheating on his wife).

Petraeus is known in this country as a hero. As the director of the CIA, Petraeus has been our go-to guy for handling terrorism, our military and global threats. But after an FBI investigation stumbled upon his extramarital affair via his computer, our nation's superman was encouraged to step down just two days after the president's reelection.

If this story sounds all too familiar, it's probably because it is. Remember when the John Edwards/Rielle Hunter story broke? We all gripped our faces like we were auditioning for Home Alone 4. What about Anthony Weiner's Twitter pic snafu? And let's not forget former Gov. Eliot Spitzer, who was caught patronizing prostitutes after making it his professional mission to cut down on . . . prostitution (oops). As a society, we're lulled into a sense that people in prominent, morality-based professions must, of course, have a high degree of integrity in their personal lives. So every time we hear a story like Petraeus' — and it seems to happen a lot — we feel blindsided and burned like it's the first time.

Could we have seen this coming? And more importantly, could there actually be a link between highly moral careers and highly immoral behavior?

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: David Petraeus Affair: Do Some Careers Make Us Likely to Cheat?

— Monica Rozenfeld

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Love Lessons From Hurricane Sandy

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Relying on friends and neighbors during a natural disaster can teach you a lot about love.

Sandy rolled through the northeast with a thunderous wind, plenty of rain and destruction. The storm transformed a city that never sleeps to one with a slow-paced walk.

Since Sandy rolled in last week, I haven't had electricity or cell phone service in my current apartment, but was blessed to have friends with electricity. I am in a spacious one bedroom on the 37th floor overlooking the entire city. I have hot water, food, eight friends and support during this time and all of that feels fantastic.

It got me thinking about how this Frankenstorm has given us permission to reach out and ask for help, which for most of us is one of the hardest things to do. In my opinion, asking for help has everything to do with exchanging love: allowing yourself to receive it and allowing another to give it. It seems like technology and the belief that doing it all on our own "proves something" and has really prevented so many of us from sharing and expressing love!

What happened to asking for sugar from the neighbor or having an open-door policy so friends could just drop by whenever? While technology has increased convenience and abundance, it has taken away the one-on-one connection factor that most of us crave unknowingly on a very deep level.

I work from home and most days I am by myself. It is amazing how much I crave human interaction. I miss it so much that most days I make my way to the local coffee shop just so I am surrounded by humans. Somehow, the presence of other people is comforting, even though I don't know anyone.

All of us have this in some form and it can be recognized as feeling anxiety, depression, stress, tension or by throwing out your back. What is missing is the human touch, a hug, a helping hand, a conversation and letting people in to be a part of our world, even if for a moment.

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: Love Lessons From Hurricane Sandy.

— Kavita Patel

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6 Sexy Foods That Will Boost Your Libido

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, find out which foods will spice up your sex life!

With our crazy lifestyles these days, there are many factors that can contribute to a decrease in libido, including stress, toxicity from our environment, and poor diet. Poor libido often underlies a bigger issue like inflammation that can impair energy production and blood flow, both of which are important for a healthy sex drive.

If this is a concern of yours, there are many steps you can take to get your body reenergized, including adding some key foods to your diet. Although there are a number of so-called superfoods that specifically boost libido, if your current diet is unhealthy, simply eating them may not give you the result you're looking for. To boost libido organically requires that you obtain true health from within.

The good news is that you can incorporate some common foods into a healthy diet that will help to reduce inflammation, increase blood flow throughout the body, and raise your energy. In fact, these foods will not only help you feel better, they will also make you look better, which will do wonders for your libido. Here are six everyday foods you should be eating:

  1. Salmon. Wild-caught salmon is a great source of the omega-3 fatty acids EPA and DHA that help maintain the fluidity of our cell membranes. They keep our cardiovascular systems healthy by reducing inflammation, preventing excessive blood clotting, and keeping fats in the blood at healthy levels. Salmon is great grilled, broiled, or added to an omelet or salad. The same omega-3 fats are also found in other fatty fish like tuna, black cod, halibut, and mackerel.
  2. Avocados. Yes, avocados are high in fat, but they're also high in healthy fats like omega-9 and omega-3. They're anti-inflammatory, so they support a healthy cardiovascular system and blood sugar regulation. In addition, they're high in fiber and rich in antioxidants like vitamin C, the fat-soluble vitamin K, folate, and B vitamins. They're also a source of high-quality protein. To get a healthy dose of avocado, (rather than slathering guacamole on your beef burrito,) add avocado chunks to a tossed salad. The fats will help increase absorption of phytonutrients from your greens, carrots, and tomatoes.

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: Six Sexy Foods That Will Boost Your Libido.

— Linda DiBella

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3 Prevalent Myths About Sex, Debunked

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, Susie and Otto Collins debunk some common sex myths.

It's going to be a disappointing 45 years if this study is correct!

In the United States, the average life expectancy for men is 76 years. For women, it's 81. But a sex satisfaction poll conducted earlier this year showed that both men and women considered the best sex of their lives to have occurred in their early 30s! The conclusion drawn from the survey was that both men and women reach their sexual peaks around 30 years of age.

It's clear that there are lots of beliefs about who, how, and when to have great sex out there. The problem is that some of the most prevailing beliefs are flat-out false.

The trouble with this survey is that it drew from a relatively small pool of people (about 1,281 people), and it's therefore misleading. For instance, you might read a headline that reads "Men and Women Reach Sexual Peak in Their 30s" and feel both reassured and very disheartened.

Sadly, it might confirm your perception of your own sexual experiences. And if you're already in your 40s, 50s, 60s, or even 70s, you might be wondering if that's it. You had your chance at great and satisfying sex, and now you have to settle for boring sex or none at all!

If you're past your mid-30s and you don't feel like you've had much (or any) fabulous sex, you might feel depressed and maybe even angry about that. We'd like to look at little more closely at some common sex myths to give you some hope. You see, we believe that you can have amazing and connecting sex even if you're past what others say is your "sexual peak."

  1. Men peak younger than women. The prevailing belief used to be that men had their sexual peak at 18, while women peaked at 30. We wonder how much of this myth was linked to different attitudes about when and whether men and women should claim their sexual desires. There's no doubt that this myth creates a sense of mismatch in heterosexual relationships. It sets women and men up to believe that they'll never be on the "same page" when it comes to really enjoying sexual intimacy. This causes distance and disconnection.
  2. Sex declines (or disappears) as you age. A big myth about sex is that it's just not fun or passionate the older you get. For some, there is a belief that you won't have sex much (or at all) when you get past a certain age. This belief puts even more negative stress and strain on getting older! When a person's body changes, he or she may give up trying to have great sex or even think it's inappropriate. Rather than exploring new ways of being sexual with his or her partner, the person might completely shut down sexually. For those who are single, this myth may cause them to stop dating or refuse to date because of their or their potential partner's age.
  3. Sex inevitably becomes boring in long-term relationships. From our readers and coaching clients, we often hear that it is "just a given that passion will die over time." The belief here is that it's normal and unavoidable — sex will become stale and boring in a long-term relationship. The consequences of buying into this myth include harboring resentment and anger, turning to addictions to make up for no passion, having affairs, or merely tolerating a lagging sex life.

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: Three Prevalent Myths About Sex, Debunked.

— Susie and Otto Collins

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Breast Cancer on TV: 8 Characters Who Got It Right

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, Jessica Ashley talks about how actresses raise hope and strength about cancer battles through the lives of your favorite characters.

Kristina Braverman's breast cancer diagnosis on the second episode of this season's Parenthood may not have played out as it does in real life — being called into the office immediately after a mammogram, silence, all overplayed by Iron & Wine's haunting "Naked As We Come." But the strained smile and tears as Kristina waved across a parking lot to husband Adam, the look of distress that pulled him toward her to see what was wrong — that felt very real.

Television scripts and actors may not always get the real story of breast cancer right. Bringing the experiences to screen, however, has changed the way we think, speak and view the true-life patients and survivors of cancer. TV keep us very up to date and aware, reminding us all through fundraising or gentle nudges or walks for the cure to get a mammogram.

In a nod to the beginning of Breast Cancer Awareness month, we're taking a look at the television characters who were diagnosed, treated with chemo and surgery and radiation, lost and shaved their Hollywood-long hair, died and survived and sweat and laughed for us during prime time.

  1. Dana Fairbanks from The L Word was played by Erin Daniels and is one of few television characters who dies from the disease on-screen. Diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma, Dana's final episodes were full of aching moments. After it aired, Daniels said that preparing for the passing of her character and her own time as a cast member was very emotional for her. "It felt like I was experiencing the slow death of a best friend and of course that was really painful because I'd become so attached to her. I knew her better than anybody else and I still do and always will," the actress commented.

    Online rumors point to creator Ilene Chaiken as admitting she regrets how Dana's fight ended. What was real about Dana's experience? Dana is fit, athletic and young, a counter to the images often written about breast cancer. While her death startled viewers, the tense and sad hospital scenes showed a side of illness otherwise glamorized in medical dramas.

  2. Celia Hodes of Weeds, played by Elizabeth Perkins, is main character marijuana dealer Nancy's manipulative, self-involved, alcohol abusing, too-close-for-comfort neighbor. Celia's breast cancer is discovered in season one and she moves on in subsequent seasons to become an informant against her friend and deal pot through her cosmetics line.

    What's real about Celia's experience? Breast cancer doesn't always happen to likable people. Hopefully, characters who resemble Celia a little too much have their own circle of supportive friends and family — no matter how many hijinks they pull.

  3. Murphy Brown of Murphy Brown, dry-witted and determined, has to be persuaded by friend Corky Sherwood to get a mammogram. The show's last season is centered on Murphy's treatment, which includes a medical marijuana controversy.

    What was real about Murphy's experience? The number of mammograms women is said to have soared 30 percent after the show aired. The character's snarky comments didn't dissipate and later, the American Cancer Society honored Candice Bergen for her contributions to breast cancer prevention and education.

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: Breast Cancer on TV: 8 Characters Who Got It Right.

— Jessica Ashley

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What Barack Obama and Mitt Romney Have in Common

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.


We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, Elisabeth LaMotte shares similarities between President Barack Obama and Republican candidate Mitt Romney.

Say what you will about the president and his opponent, they both seem to have exceptionally happy marriages, especially compared to some other high-profile couples of late. Ahem, Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Obviously, looks can be deceiving. Take John Edwards, for example. None of us knows the behind-closed-doors reality of other peoples' marriages. Still, since President Obama burst onto the national political scene at the 2004 convention, everything we have learned about him reflects what seems to be an exceptionally healthy, happy, loving marriage.

So what lessons can we glean from the president's relationship with his wife? For starters, Barack and Michelle prioritize date nights. And as a DC resident, I have been caught in more than one traffic jam that resulted therefrom.

They also talk about keeping each other real. Over the years, many of my psychotherapy patients have mentioned that they feel inspired by the way the president and First Lady speak about each other. For example, at the Democratic Convention, when Michelle Obama said, "We were so young, so in love and so in debt," it helped young couples know that it's possible to get through challenging financial times and that love does make a difference.

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: What Barack Obama and Mitt Romney Have in Common.

— Elisabeth LaMotte

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Give My Kid Plan B Behind My Back? Yes, Please!

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, one mother offers her take on NYC schools' decision to give the morning-after pill without parental consent.

Thirteen New York City high schools are making Plan B available to students without parental notification. The only thing that upsets me about this news is that it doesn't apply to my middle schooler.

Lesson of the Day: Don't Use Plan B as Your Only Birth Control

Katie Mcdonough at Salon.com calls this a turning point for sex ed in America, and the New York Post reports that only one to two percent of parents have opted out of the program. But we tend to be avant-garde about these things in the NYC, and I'm sure parents across the nation are cringing at the thought of 14-year-olds having sex.

Heck, I'm cringing about it right now.

I'm not saying it's pretty. Or that they're even enjoying it. (Let's all take a moment to shudder at the memory of our own ill-considered youthful adventures.) But 14- and 15-year-olds had sex without telling their parents back in the '80s when I was a teen, so it's only dangerous optimism that makes us Generation Xers think our kids are immune to hormone-driven shenanigans.

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: Give My Kid Plan B Behind My Back? Yes, Please!.

— Jen Anderson

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5 Do-Gooder Dates

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, Jessica Zaleski shares volunteer date ideas to do some good with your significant other.

I'm ashamed to admit this, but the last time I did community service was in high school, to get a college scholarship. Once I got to college, I was so busy with classes, friends, a boyfriend and extracurriculars, that I didn't have time to volunteer. However, after seeing Emma Stone and her boyfriend Andrew Garfield urging their fans to check out charities instead of take paparazzi shots of them, I'm inspired to start doing some good. The young couple must be busier than I am with interviews, movies, appearances and award shows, but they still found a way to squeeze in some community service.

After seeing Emma Stone and Andrew Garfield turn a date into an opportunity to raise awareness about charities, I started thinking of ways I could also turn boyfriend time into volunteering time. Call me crazy, but spending time together and helping people in need sounds better than another dinner-and-movie date. So next time you're planning a romantic day or evening as a couple, think about taking your man on some of these do-gooder dates.

  1. Donate Blood Together. I've never given blood because even the thought of blood-filled needles makes me queasy. Every time I walk past a blood mobile, I get lightheaded and want to walk (or run) in the other direction. However, I know donating blood is a helpful thing to do because many hospitals could be low on rare blood types, so donating can change someone's life. Going with my guy would make donating way easier. I would have someone who could make me laugh and hold my hand when I get scared. The American Red Cross website has an awesome tool that allows you to put in your zip code and find a blood drive near you. So instead of making reservations at that new steakhouse, make reservations at a blood drive (a pint of blood trumps a bloody steak).
  2. Donate Each Other's Clothes. You know those cargo shorts your guy has worn for the last six summers? Well, here's your opportunity to toss them. Tell him you want to donate some clothes to Goodwill or to The Salvation Army. You get to go through his clothes and find some things to give away, but he also gets to go through yours and toss the items he hates (bye bye, sequined harem pants). You may be sad you're losing some clothes, but think of all the people you will be helping out as a couple.
  3. Go on a Toy Shopping Spree. Every year in October, November and December, the U.S. Marine Corps collects toys to give as Christmas gifts to less-fortunate children. This is the perfect opportunity to act like kids again. Go to the nearest toy store with your guy, and each pick out a few toys you would have loved to receive as a kid. Then, use this site to find the nearest Toys For Tots donation center. Bring the toys there, and help children experience the magic of Christmas (Bonus points if you dress up as Santa and Mrs. Claus while shopping!)

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: 5 Do-Gooder Dates (Be Like Emma Stone & Andrew Garfield!).

— Jessica Zaleski

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Barack Obama

How Barack and Michelle Obama Restored My Faith in Marriage

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today Rajul Punjabi discusses the Obamas as relationship role models.

As an independent 20-something, I want a marriage like the Obamas or I don't want one at all.

Talk is cheap, which is why political speeches have never really been appealing to me. However, Michelle Obama's speech during the Democratic National Convention really got me thinking. Not so much about taxes, health reform, and the election, but about love. So here, I declare my radical political stance: Barack and Michelle have my dream relationship. Their actions, words — and even their innuendo — have built my standard of what makes for a healthy and enduring marriage.

As the first lady stood up there telling a story about life as a newlywed with Barack ("We were so young, so in love, so in debt," she blushed), I sank into the couch mesmerized. It was the first time in a long time that I'd heard the term "so in love" without wanting to roll my eyes.

As a single, late-20-something New York City woman, the idea of marriage has never thrilled me. Wedding bands have always seemed like diamond-studded baby boas to me, constricting in a slick and deadly way. The idea of waking up to the same person every single morning, and every day turning into a routine makes me want to inflate my life vest and jump ship. Even some couples who have been dating for a long time make me uncomfortable with their "we-ing." "We Summer in the Hamptons," or "We watch way too much reality TV." Is this what happens when you fall in love? Two previously cool people melt hopelessly into one very vanilla fusion that stays at home on Saturday nights to watch Real Housewives reruns?

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: How Barack and Michelle Obama Restored My Faith in Marriage.

— Rajul Punjabi

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How Dating Multiple Guys at Once Can Help You Find Love

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today we learn the benefits of dating more than one guy at a time.

So many of my dating-coaching clients ask me why they should date more than one man at a time. As their search for love heats up, suddenly there are a few guys who are interested, and they don't know how to handle it. The other scenario is that they fall in love too quickly with one guy and end up heartbroken time after time.

Have either of these situations happened to you?

When I was looking for love on my dating journey, I often dated up to three guys simultaneously. (This got tough when all three happened to be named "John," but that's a story for another time.) I wasn't trying to hit some number in the Guinness World Records book. My goal was simple: to find a guy I could date more than three times, hoping this would lead to a relationship.

Frequently, men would drop out after one, two, or three dates. I knew this rejection was about finding a compatible partner. Being realistic, the guys were seeing more than one woman at a time, too. You might as well just accept that fact. Since there was no way to know who would stick around, I dated as many guys as I was interested in at the same time. That's why I’m an advocate for "volume dating." I dated 30 men in 15 months to meet my husband.

This is very different than dating more than one person long-term. Let me explain what I mean by "dating." From my perspective as a dating coach, dating is only the first four to 10 dates. Once you have an unspoken date on Saturday night, you have moved into the first phase of relationship.

I point this out because within the first few dates with one man, you shouldn't allow yourself to feel so emotionally attached that seeing someone else would be a problem. Remember, until you're in an exclusive relationship where this has been discussed and agreed on, you are free to seek out other partners. So I want to be clear — a few dates is not by any means a relationship.

The problem comes in when women feel prematurely attached, which keeps them from being willing to date other guys. This limits your options before you know you are on the right path. That's how heartbreak happens — when you think you've found "the one" after two dates, and then he never calls again.

This is why dating more than one guy at a time is a very smart strategy to find lasting love. It's:

  • Fun and exciting
  • Effective for meeting lots of men to find the right mate
  • A smart way to boost your confidence and improve your dating skills
  • The answer to keep you from focusing on just one man before it's appropriate
  • A way to make you less available, which in turn makes you more attractive

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: How Dating Multiple Guys at Once Can Help You Find Love.

— Ronnie Ann Ryan

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5 Signs You Are Ready For a New Relationship After a Breakup

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today we find out some of signs that you're ready to start dating someone new after a breakup.

Going through a breakup is always difficult. There really is no "good" end to a relationship. After all, that little, nagging voice inside your head is more than happy to keep reminding you that you have once again failed to find that perfect person.

The good news is that you will determine, at some point in time, that you are ready to enter back into the world of dating. Unfortunately, too many people try to push themselves to get back into a relationship before they are mentally and emotionally ready. Sometimes these people are afraid of being alone, see their social status as a single as unacceptable, or they succumb to peer pressure to get back out there and date.

With the end of a long-term serious relationship, you may need months to get back to a place where you are self-satisfied, happy, and able to really evaluate how good of a prospective new partner a date may be. Look for these five signs in yourself that will let you know that you are in a good place to start dating again.

Sign 1: You Are Comfortable as a Single
You have to be comfortable with your own company to avoid accepting a relationship with just anyone. Sure, you may feel like you are missing having a companion and partner, but you don't stay home and avoid going out just because you are single.

Sign 2: You Are Not Desperate to Find the Right One — Tonight!
If every time you go out you are looking for Mr. or Ms. Right, then you are not comfortable with yourself and you are looking for someone to fill in the gaps in your own emotional and spiritual being. This leaves you vulnerable to people that sense that need and take advantage of it.

Sign 3: You Are Able to Look Back on the Last Relationship Honestly
The breakup of most couples is not one-sided. Both people had some role in the lack of communication, distance, lack of intimacy, or whatever else caused the issue. Being able to admit responsibility allows you to change to prevent that in future relationships.

Sign 4: You Know What You Want and What You Don't
This includes more than the physical, you know the personality and character traits you want in a partner as well as those that you don't. You are able to say "no" to a relationship that is not what you want.

Sign 5: You See the Person For What They Are
Sure, love really is blind, especially when the brain chemicals are going crazy in the first part of the relationship. When you are in a solid emotional state, you are able to still see the person honestly and accept him or her just as they are, not as a "fixer-upper."

Taking a bit of time to get yourself in a good place emotionally and mentally after the end of a relationship will help you in finding that perfect match in your future.

— Sherry Gaba

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Online Dating? Don't Let Your First Email Be a Dud

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today we learn how to make a good first impression when dating online.

You only get one chance to make a first impression; this is as true in Internet dating as it is in life. But now that there are millions of people dating online, the competition is fiercer than ever. If you want to get someone's attention, you need your initial email to really stand out.

I will get to some sample emails, but before I do, let's look at a few, simple guidelines to help you write that irresistible introductory email to the potential future love of your life:

  1. Be brief. Don't write more than a short paragraph. All you're trying to do in this first email is arouse someone's curiosity and get him or her to respond.
  2. Be funny. Everyone loves humor. Don't just say, "I'm funny" — say something funny like, "Boy, are you cute! Email me; I don't bite!" This one gets 'em every time!
  3. Be sexy. Let's be honest: the search for true love eventually leads to sex. So what's the harm in a little harmless sexual innuendo? This doesn't mean you sleep with someone on the first, second, or even 10th date, but there's no harm in creating a little sexual spark right from the start.
  4. Be provocative. Don't be afraid to go over the edge a bit and say something forthright. A client once saw that someone had put her in his favorites. Here's what she wrote: "Hey! Hurry up and write me! How are we going to get this romance off the ground?" She got a response within minutes and a date for the following Friday.
  5. Be silly. Don't belabor what you write. The best emails are off-the-cuff. "Hey, I like collecting chopsticks — you like collecting chopsticks! Looks like we're a match made in heaven. ;-)" One last thing: use emoticons and acronyms, but use them sparingly. More than a couple in an email is overkill.

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: Online Dating? Don't Let Your First Email Be a Dud.

— Lisa Shield

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7 Tips For Enjoying Your First Vacation Together

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today we learn seven tips to make your first romantic getaway a great experience.

Your first vacation as a couple is such an exciting milestone. This is an important point in your relationship because you will get a better idea of your long-term compatibility.

While it's easy to feel excited about going away together, you want to guard against unrealistic expectations that can ruin a good time. Keep in mind that your first vacation is not your honeymoon, so it might not be the most romantic event of your entire life. But that doesn't mean it won't be fun.

Ultimately, you want to make sure you get along. As a dating coach for women, I want to share seven suggestions on how to enjoy yourselves and minimize common stress points:

  1. Consider a long weekend instead a full-week vacation for your first trip. When you start small, you can tolerate differences so much easier. This is an opportunity to see what your rhythm will be like as a couple when you are together 24/7. The smart move is to try three or four days before getting in too deep and discovering you aren't trip-compatible.
  2. Discuss destinations and pick one together. You may want to go someplace where the outlet shopping is fantastic. He may want to go camping in the mountains. Choose a location that offers something for each of you. Compromise is the key to a lasting relationship so this will give you a chance to get your feet wet and build an essential skill.

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: 7 Tips For Enjoying Your First Vacation Together.

Written by Ronnie Ann Ryan.

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Advice For the Newly Single

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt of a story from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, we get some tips on what to do when you've just gotten out of a relationship.

It happens to everyone. You’re sailing along smoothly in a meaningful relationship, and then next thing you know, you find yourself single. Sometimes it’s expected. Sometimes it’s not. Sometimes it’s your choice. Sometimes it’s not.

Whatever the reason, you’ve recently found yourself single. Now what?

You may want to complain about what a jerk your ex is for breaking up with you like that. I mean, did they really use the "it’s not you, it’s me line" on you? What a jerk! Are they really now dating that "friend" of theirs that you knew they had something for? You knew it all along, didn’t you? Well, forget about it! Stop rehashing the past. And stop complaining about your ex, too. Both will do you no good.

Rehashing the past as well as complaining about your ex is what people like to call "baggage." It’s not very attractive, and it’s not helping you get any dates anytime soon, either. To get over this "baggage," you’ll first have to come to terms with the hurt and anguish that naturally comes with any breakup. It’s OK to admit it. You really do feel hurt after a breakup. Even if your relationship was rocky at the end, there were still good things about it that you’ll miss. There are friends you won’t see as much anymore, places you won’t visit as much, and a whole lot more extra time on the nights and weekends that you don’t want. Stop fighting it and admit that your breakup hurt. Even if it was just a little.

There. Now that you’ve come to terms with the breakup and let go of all that "baggage’" (which I’m sure you were able to do all at once after just reading the last couple paragraphs), it’s time to look ahead.

What are you going to do now?

The worst thing you can do is jump into another relationship right away. Remember that "friend" your ex started dating right after the breakup? Well, the joke is on them now, because that’s called a "rebound relationship" — which we all know never works out. You took the better path: you came to terms with your breakup and sorted yourself out before looking for a great relationship again.

Or have you? Have you really sorted yourself out? Being single is the perfect time to work on you. Remember those hobbies that you stopped doing because you couldn’t find the time? What about those old friends you lost touch with because you just got too busy? Are you still any good at those old hobbies? Do you even still like those old friends? Being single is a perfect time to revisit your hobbies, friends, or whatever else fell by the wayside, and see if they’re still important to you or not.

Remember, people change — and so do you. Over the course of your old relationship, you may have found new parts of you that you didn’t know existed. You may have found new places you like, new pastimes you enjoy. But you’re only familiar with these in the context of being in a relationship. What are they like now that you’re single? Being single is a great way to explore yourself, get to know yourself, and become more comfortable in your own skin. In fact, this is probably the best thing you can do for yourself while you’re single.

For the rest of the article, head to YourTango: Advice For the Newly Single

Written by Singles Warehouse for YourTango.

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5 Dating Tips For a Great First Date

We're happy to present this excerpt from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, we learn five tips for a successful first date.

During the last couple weeks, you have communicated with someone you're interested in via emails and several telephone conversations. Then, it becomes obvious that there's "phone chemistry" and a mutual interest in meeting each other. You both agree to meet in person — now for the moment of truth! Here are five rules of dating which can help you feel more comfortable and ultimately be more successful:

  1. Visualize success. Think about your wonderful attributes and not your faults. Take an inventory of your values, skills, talents, interests, and "heart." Leave all your negative thoughts at home.
  2. Keep your expectations in check. Don't start imagining yourself at the altar with your date. I recommend you ask yourself these three questions first: Do I like the person? Does the conversation flow easily with one another? Is there any kind of attraction? And that's it. If you answer yes to these questions, then I recommend you be open to seeing the person again.
  3. Dress appropriately. Be presentable, neat, well-groomed, and in casual dress clothes. If you're a man, then don't come to a date in a t-shirt and jeans. For women, do not come dressed "to kill" by looking overly sexy like you are going to a nightclub. Strive to look like the guy or girl next door and someone who they would feel comfortable bringing home to their parents.
  4. Use your values as your guideposts. Know what's most important to you in your life and look to see if your date has similar feelings. Pay close attention to anything that makes you uncomfortable — your gut is usually right!
  5. Be courteous and kind to your date (even if you are not interested). This is truly the golden rule of dating. You never really know where you will see him or her again and who his or her friends are. Always treat people the way you wish to be treated.

By keeping these rules of dating in mind, you will have more pleasant dating experiences. This process can truly lead you to meaningful and successful relationships.

Written by Coach Amy Schoen for YourTango.

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Taylor Swift and More Ladies Top Highest-Paid-Celebs-Under-30 List

We're happy to present this excerpt from one of our favorite sites, YourTango.

We're happy to present this excerpt from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, we find out how Forbes's new highest-paid-celebs list shows that young women are on top.

Some of our most favorite women are dominating in love and on Forbes's new list of highest-paid celebrities.

The magazine says, "On our list of the 10 highest-paid celebrities under 30, women take six spots and four of the top five."

So who are the young ladies who are rockin' their bank accounts?

  1. Taylor Swift: Go T-Swift! She's only 22 and she's rocking our world at the number one spot on the list! Already at work on her fourth album, Swift has won two Grammys for her song "Mean." Forbes estimates that she made $57 million between May 2011 and May 2012. Take that, anyone who has ever been mean to Swift!
  2. Rihanna: Another young singer to top the list at number three, Rihanna has gotten a lot of flak for baring her skin this year. To be fair, the 24-year-old performed 85 shows in 12 months — we think she earned the right to bare it all and rake in $53 million!
  3. Katy Perry: Ms. Perry, 27, is lighting up the world with her "Fireworks" this year at number five. She may have split from husband Russell Brand, but who cares when you have five number-one singles and have made it into music history right next to Michael Jackson? Making $45 million last year doesn't hurt either.
  4. Adele: The 24-year-old is rolling in the deep money with her smash hit album, 21. She recently announced that she's pregnant with boyfriend Simon Konecki's baby, and let's not forget those six Grammys she took home earlier this year. We wish we could have a part of the fortune ($35 million) Adele made last year, which secured her spot at number six.
  5. Kristen Stewart: The 22-year-old actress has really showed the world how multitalented she is. From Twilight to Snow White and the Huntsman to modeling for a fragrance, she's made Forbes's list this year a few spots before her boyfriend, Robert Pattinson (she's number seven, and he's number 10). The press can't get enough of Stewart — she has a fierce attitude and has never apologized for it. Rock on, Stewart — we can't wait to see what you come up with next!

To determine the rankings of their highest-paid under-30 list, Forbes considered "album and concert sales, movie paydays, profit participation, endorsements, and advertising work. We did not deduct for agent fees or the expenses related to being a celebrity." See the full list here.

Written by Kali Lamparelli for YourTango.

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