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You Asked: Where Did the Fun Go?

Dear Sugar,

My boyfriend and I have been fighting over the stupidest little things lately. We have been together just over ten months and it seems like we are almost at a make it or break it point. We both realize there is no actual problem with our relationship except that we take things too seriously. We tend to be on the defensive a lot and never joke around as much anymore. I basically think our relationship is lacking fun. We don't goof around as much, at least not in my boyfriend's opinion so I feel I need to find a way to lighten up the mood a bit. I really want this to work, and so does he, so any advice would be really appreciated. — Lackluster Leslie

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Dear Lackluster Leslie,

All relationships have their ups and downs so it could be that you guys are just on the downward swing. Some couples also experience a rough patch close to the year mark when they realize that their relationship is no longer just fun and games, but rather a long term, committed relationship where the next step could be marriage.

Since you both want to make this work, try taking a break from the norm. Go away for the weekend, spice things up in the bedroom or try to act a little more silly while you're both at home hanging out — it sounds as though you're simply stuck in a rut. Keep the lines of communication open and try to get to the bottom of why you've both become so serious. If there's an underlying reason, this could all be about resentment so make sure you're talking to each other. At the end of the day, you both need to be devoted to making this relationship instead of breaking it. Good luck.

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