So I have a rather bizarre and somewhat embarrassing dilemma. I've been with my current boyfriend for six months and we get along so well. We spend all our free time together, and we talk openly about how much we love each other and want to get married someday.
So here's the deal. He's an extremely sexual person, wanting to do things I've never done with anyone before. It's actually been really fun and liberating. But his birthday is coming up, and he wants me do do something that may be crossing the line here — he's asked me to pee on him. He says it's a fantasy of his, and it would make him really happy, but I feel really weird about the whole thing. Is this normal?
— My-Boyfriend's-Erotic Elizabeth
Dear My-Boyfriend's-Erotic Elizabeth
As weird as his request may be, it's not completely uncommon to want your lover to pee on you. With that said, that's not really the issue here. What really matters is whether or not you feel comfortable doing what your boyfriend has asked. You shouldn't feel pressured to do anything sexually that you don't want to do, even if it is his birthday.
It's great that he feels so open and comfortable to want to share this fantasy with you, but he's also got to understand that it's a strange request. I suggest talking to him about your feelings and reservations. You may need to set up some rules about it, like, "This makes me really uncomfortable and I think it's gross, so how about I pour warm water on you instead?" or if you're up for it, "I'll do it to you but I don't want you doing it to me," or "I'll only do it this one and only time, but that's it." Talking about the experience before it happens will make you both feel better. I hope this helps Ellen.
— Additional reporting by Alexis Nordby