You Asked: My Boyfriend Is Quiet in Bed


Dear Sugar--

During sex, my boyfriend is so quiet. He doesn't make any noises or
anything. I feel like I am doing something wrong, but when I bring it up to him he says everything is fine, that he is just quiet. Should I be worried?

--A Little Concerned Connie

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Dear A Little Concerned Connie--

Everyone expresses their sexuality in different ways, and it sounds like your man may be the quiet type. As long as he seems to be enjoying himself (he reaches orgasm), I'm sure you are doing everything right.

I am glad you feel comfortable asking him about it, that's the first step, but it simply may be his personality to be less than a screamer in the bedroom. Or he may have learned to be that way from his past sexual experiences (maybe he had to be quiet because of a roommate or an ex who didn't like him to be vocal). Let him know that you don't think there's anything wrong with him keeping quiet, but you just want to make sure he really does enjoy your sex life.

Just because a person is "the quiet type" doesn't mean he can't ever let out his wild side. If you're used to a partner who moans, groans, screeches, and giggles, and you want to see that come out with this guy, try going a little out of your comfort zone. Experiment with times of day, places in your home, and try to tempt him by being the one in control. Wear an outfit you think would drive him crazy, spend a lot of time on foreplay, and slow down your lovemaking. He may just need a change of pace to help him break out of his shell. Have fun trying!

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