I just graduated from high school this past May and am currently living from home, but since then, I feel like everything has gone downhill. Most of my friends have moved away to go to school and I still live at home. I attend an amazing university, but still, I can't help but feel depressed. I feel like I don’t even know who I am anymore. I'm not happy with what I’m doing with my life.
I just ended things with this guy who was extremely controlling and every other relationship I have been in has been just as bad and I feel like it’s me that’s causing it. I feel like I need a new change of pace. There is nothing here for me anymore.
I want to leave, but I love my family to death and the thought of leaving them and everything I know behind just breaks my heart. But at the same time, I just feel like the only way for me to move on with my life is to get away from all the things that are making me unhappy. Please help!
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Dear Sad Sally,
If you’re not happy with your life right now, you’ve got to figure out what’s making you feel that way, and change it. Since you just graduated high school, and your friends have moved away, I don’t blame you for feeling lonely and left behind. It's great that you like the school you’re going to, and you love living near your family, but do you love living with them? I’m thinking that part of your unhappiness must be that you’re struggling with wanting your independence and your own life, just like other women your age.
I know you love your family, and it’s really scary to think about leaving the comforts of home, but you don’t have to move far away per se. See whether your family can help you pay for rent so you can get a place of your own or think about getting a part-time job if you're not too busy with school work. Taking the plunge out of the nest will be the best thing for you. It’s a great experience to have your freedom. You’ll get to meet new people, grow as an individual, and learn a lot about yourself. You'll still get to see your family, but you'll be able to have your space from them too. I'm sure your parents will support your decision one hundred percent, and do what they can to help make it happen. Change is good for the soul, and it sounds as if it would be just the thing to give you a new attitude about life. Good luck, Sally.