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You Asked: I Don't Trust My Fiancé

You Asked: I Don't Trust My Fiancé

Dear Sugar--


My girlfriend of 1 year is very sexy and loving. She was in a few failed relationships before and now is too eager to get married to me. Her last boyfriend left her and I was there on her rebound. Sadly she was still keeping the old baggage of her memories which was difficult for me. She even put photos of him in the picture frame I gave her. When I confronted her, she told me that it was difficult to let go of him, but she loves me now.

We got engaged 3 months ago but I still see her (I caught her actually) emailing messages to him - she said it was just as friends. She also has too many guy friends who call her when we are out together which makes me jealous and insecure. When I make an issue of it, she says she loves me and cries.

Her past is catching up with us and I don't know if I can trust her as she has lied to me several times. Please help and advise me as I do love her but I do not want a future shattered marriage.

--In Love with a Liar Liam

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Dear In Love with a Liar Liam--

It sounds like you are in love with someone who is not ready to love you in the way you deserve. She is too wrapped up in her past to give of herself completely, and that is totally unfair and extremely disrespectful to you. It's not to say that she will never be able to love you wholly, but right now that's just not possible for her.

No matter how much you want to be with her, getting married will not instantly dissolve your insecurities or her past relationships and her lying. You two need to deal with these issues before you commit to one another. The person you marry is someone you should be able to trust 100%, and since you don't trust your fiancée - you should NOT proceed with this wedding. My suggestion is to call off your engagement until you have a chance to work everything out and get on the same page about your relationship. If you go through with this wedding, things are bound to get worse than they already are. Good luck Liam.

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