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You Asked: Am I Not Making Myself Available?


Dear Sugar,
I have never been a real commitment person. I have had a couple flings in the past year but nothing serious. I'm ready to open up to a more serious relationship and am actively looking, but I haven't found anything worthwhile so far. I have been told, repeatedly, that I am constantly putting up "single signals," which apparently keep others from approaching me. What are these and how can I stop them? — Playing the Field Phoebe

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Dear Playing the Field Phoebe,

While there are definitely subconscious signs we all give off to others, most of them are simply part of our personalities. When your friends say single signals, I'm assuming that they're saying you're confident, perhaps flirty and outgoing — all of which are great qualities to posses. And just because you haven't met anyone worthwhile yet, it's not to say that your personality traits are to blame.

Being approachable is extremely important when meeting new people, so make sure you're aware of the vibe you're giving off. Try to keep a smile on your face and just have fun — no one wants to approach a Debbie Downer. But when the time is right Phoebe, you'll meet someone that sparks your interest, regardless of your signals!

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