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Video of Balloon Boy Dad Richard Heene

Top 5 Reasons Balloon Boy's Dad Is a Jerk

The more I hear about Richard Heene, father of Balloon Boy, the more I'm frightened by the man. Before he and his family took over the media yesterday, Richard was busy starring in videos in which he comes off as hostile and misogynistic.


Here are my top five reasons this man is a jerk:

  1. It's likely that he tricked the media and government officials into thinking his 6-year-old son Falcon was flying away in a balloon. News just broke that Richard first called the local TV station to report that Falcon took off, while his wife called 911 and the FAA. His likely hoax cost taxpayers a lot of money.
  2. On an episode of Wife Swap, Richard made a "bitchmeter" for his swapped wife and said: "You're a man's nightmare. I'm so glad my wife was born in Japan."
  3. He's videotaped himself ranting about how "ugly chicks need makeup to look like hot chicks." (I've included the video above. It's scary.)
  4. He had his kids star in a homemade rap video about the "pussification" of America. In a "pussified" world, "the females are typically referred to as 'soccer moms' while the males are referred to as 'pussies.' " Huh?
  5. He makes horribly misogynistic YouTube videos, including one where he wonders whether Hillary Clinton is a reptile and another where he discusses whether Britney Spears's breasts are real.

If this family truly orchestrated the balloon fiasco for publicity, then Richard must not be surprised that the Internet is digging up countless examples of his douchiness. Perhaps that's what he wanted to happen.

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