True Confession — I'm Having an Emotional Affair

March 19, 2009

Weigh in and tell us if you forgive or not forgive this True Confession.

"I'm having an emotional affair with an old boyfriend. We're not even in the same state, but online dirty talk has done wonders for my self-esteem, and my darling husband is benefiting too. Since we haven't been physical, and I technically haven't 'cheated,' can I continue this relationship?"

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43 Comments

3 years 10 weeks

You are UNDOUBTEDLY cheating emotionally on your husband. Stop cold turkey, go and watch the sex and the city where Carrie loses and Aiden and realize how stupid you're being!

sparklestar 4 years 8 weeks

Why do people come here to seek validation for their cheating?

lifeloveandlattes 4 years 8 weeks

This is cheating, no matter how to try to spin it.

jesssa 4 years 8 weeks

what the hell! talk dirty with your own freaking husband!!

notinthemood 4 years 8 weeks

You say your husband is benefiting in the bedroom, but that's not all that is important in a relationship... TRUST is way more important than sex, and you are cheating your husband out of a deeper emotional bond with you. Why do you feel that you can open up with this ex more than your husband? Perhaps you should try to bring your real relationship to the same level of intimacy you are sharing with the other guy and cut out the middle man.

lickety split 4 years 8 weeks

how is this emotional cheating? you've exchanged dirty talk with someone in another state. you don't know their age, sex, anything about them. really, in the long run i think you are cheapening yourself. why settle for a fake relationship when you're married? you have the real thing right there in bed next to you every night. tell hubby you need to make some changes in the routine you've fallen into and cut the online individual lose.

lickety split 4 years 8 weeks

PieceofCakes 4 years 8 weeks

Cheating: Any thing you would say or do in front of your significant other. Yes you are cheating.

Spectra 4 years 8 weeks

Emotional cheating is still cheating. You may not be having sex, but you're still connecting very deeply with someone else instead of the person you SHOULD be connecting with: your husband. I know that I would be deeply hurt if my husband was emailing an old girlfriend or a female coworker or someone like that and I know he'd feel the same if I did that. If he can't trust you to confide in him, it's only a matter of time before he stops trusting you in other areas and that could lead to a real affair later on.

luna08 4 years 8 weeks

"online dirty talk has done wonders for my self-esteem, and my darling husband is benefiting too." YUCK!I'm definitely in the "Not forgive" category!

luna08 4 years 8 weeks

"online dirty talk has done wonders for my self-esteem, and my darling husband is benefiting too." YUCK! I'm definitely in the "Not forgive" category!

momma tikita 4 years 8 weeks

forgive. BUT stop it.I agree with Gscott and what if it were your hubby in your shoes? I know I'd be mad as hell!

momma tikita 4 years 8 weeks

forgive. BUT stop it. I agree with Gscott and what if it were your hubby in your shoes? I know I'd be mad as hell!

GScott86 4 years 8 weeks

One question and one question only: Can you and/or would you tell your husband about this? If the answer is no, then you're wrong. Cut it out immediately.

kurniakasih 4 years 8 weeks

If you don't mind your husband being deeply in love with his ex-gf, sure, go ahead and continue. And if you think that he won't ever find out, guess again, my hub found his ex's chatroom screen still on their computer (because believe it or not, you actually may forget to close it one day), and found out she's been doing what you and your ex are doing, and he dumped her the next day. Cut the strings. Seriously.

kurniakasih 4 years 8 weeks

If you don't mind your husband being deeply in love with his ex-gf, sure, go ahead and continue.And if you think that he won't ever find out, guess again, my hub found his ex's chatroom screen still on their computer (because believe it or not, you actually may forget to close it one day), and found out she's been doing what you and your ex are doing, and he dumped her the next day.Cut the strings. Seriously.

sprinkibrio 4 years 8 weeks

Whenever the guilt starts to get to you it will affect your relationship. When that happens you have to be ready to end the affair.

aimeeb 4 years 8 weeks

How would you feel if it was the other way around? That's your answer. :oy:

designerel 4 years 8 weeks

I consider this cheating. You shouldn't be talking dirty to a man who isn't your husband.

Deidre 4 years 8 weeks

Absolute not forgive. You are MARRIED, and this is wrong. There are all differnt forms of cheating...and this is one of them. Cut off all contact with this guy if you want to stay married.

dm8bri 4 years 8 weeks

Only a matter of time before this becomes worse than it already is. If you don't mind getting burned, continue playing with fire.

Gdeeaz 4 years 8 weeks

i would stop, to me emotional cheating is much worse than physical cheating.

frizzyfawn 4 years 8 weeks

You are definitely emotionally cheating and you need to stop. My ex-husband did this too me and tried to insist he wasn't cheating but he stopped talking to me and would only talk to the other girl. Forming that emotional bond will eventually lead to other things. My ex ended up getting together w/ her, ruining her marriage, and having a baby w/ her. And it all just started with them talking.

kimsy 4 years 8 weeks

I may be in the minority here, but I believe that chat room sex is a form of cheating. How upset would you be if you found that your husband was doing the same? End it.

ur_momm 4 years 8 weeks

I can feel where u are coming from, ive been in a similar situation... and no you cannot continue, no way no how.

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