Relationship Protocol: Is He Set in His Mother's Ways?

July 31, 2008

After hearing stories from my married friends about their husbands, I realize how many men are stuck in their mother's ways! It may be endearing for a guy to be a mama's boy, but it can seem a little childish to demand that something be done a particular way for no reason other than, "that's how my mom did it." Does your significant other act this way? Does he like to do things or ask you to do specific things a certain way because that's the way his mom did it?

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28 Comments

KaseyGirl 4 years 41 weeks

I dated a guy who cooked and did dishes like his mother - in a completely unlogical and messy way. When cooking, it was essential to use as many bowls, utensils, pots/pans, cutting boards..etc as possible! I'll never understand why you need a new knife, cutting board, and bowl to place it in for every vegetable you chop! Also, they never throw away trash...just leave it on the counter to take up space. Maybe I'm just a clean freak but it just seems like a waste of time and space. When doing dishes - or should I say lak there of, they wait until you are practically eating off of napkins with toothpicks. They seem to think that dishes need to be done twice a month. So basically they use all these dishes, then wait a while for the food to be caked on and dried, then spend hours washing them. Again, waste of time.

KaseyGirl 4 years 41 weeks

I dated a guy who cooked and did dishes like his mother - in a completely unlogical and messy way. When cooking, it was essential to use as many bowls, utensils, pots/pans, cutting boards..etc as possible! I'll never understand why you need a new knife, cutting board, and bowl to place it in for every vegetable you chop! Also, they never throw away trash...just leave it on the counter to take up space. Maybe I'm just a clean freak but it just seems like a waste of time and space.When doing dishes - or should I say lak there of, they wait until you are practically eating off of napkins with toothpicks. They seem to think that dishes need to be done twice a month. So basically they use all these dishes, then wait a while for the food to be caked on and dried, then spend hours washing them. Again, waste of time.

lilCROAT03 4 years 41 weeks

wait i feel like i didn't do my fiancee justice- as much as he's a momma's boy he does get annoyed with the calls and says my cooking is the best. he's awesome bc he helps me clean up the house, i call him 'mr.sucky sucky' bc he's obsessed with our new vacuum and can clean for hours (i think bc it's a tech thing). i love him seriously and i don't think he'll be a momma's boy forever- this is the transition time.

lilCROAT03 4 years 41 weeks

they say European men live with their parents until they get married bc it the time when they find a 'new mom'. whoever thought of that, wasn't kidding. men here don't have to do anything on their own...ever. so when an elderly man's wife dies, he's basically screwed bc he can't even heat up water for his own tea. why do i say this? bc yes, i know how it is when your sig other is stuck in his mother's ways, and i also know what it's like when she calls 50 times a day to ask if he's eaten. asking a 25 year old.if.he's.eaten. thank. you.

justanerd1975 4 years 41 weeks

ha ha anonny...a better lube,lol

a nonny mouse 4 years 42 weeks

No, never. Mr. Mouse has his own way with things and I have mine. We work it out with little disagreement. (In good candor, he attempts to follow my methods when he can remember, because he sincerely adheres to the adage, "a happy wife makes for a happy life." Plus, he simply cannot be bothered to care much about all those sundry details; he's naturally laid-back in attitude.) To be fair, we experienced more frequent rashes of bumpiness (caused by clashing expectations) during the first couple years of our marriage. We recently passed the decade mark and now infrequently squabble over the mechanics of chores and other various scut work. We've both accepted that humor serves as a better lube than venom.

a nonny mouse 4 years 42 weeks

No, never.Mr. Mouse has his own way with things and I have mine. We work it out with little disagreement. (In good candor, he attempts to follow my methods when he can remember, because he sincerely adheres to the adage, "a happy wife makes for a happy life." Plus, he simply cannot be bothered to care much about all those sundry details; he's naturally laid-back in attitude.)To be fair, we experienced more frequent rashes of bumpiness (caused by clashing expectations) during the first couple years of our marriage. We recently passed the decade mark and now infrequently squabble over the mechanics of chores and other various scut work. We've both accepted that humor serves as a better lube than venom.

snowysakurasky 4 years 42 weeks

no and that would not fly with me!

melizzle 4 years 42 weeks

Yes yes yes. And those of you who haven't experienced it... just wait till you get hitched. Sometimes, I feel like men just want a "mom figure" that does their laundry but also sleeps with them!!

melizzle 4 years 42 weeks

Yes yes yes. And those of you who haven't experienced it... just wait till you get hitched. Sometimes, I feel like men just want a "mom figure" that does their laundry but also sleeps with them!!

Silverlining10 4 years 42 weeks

Oh, and he volunteers to do all the cooking himself!

Silverlining10 4 years 42 weeks

My boyfriend is not close to his mother, and even when I tried learning how his mother folds his clothes and underwear, he told me he liked my way better. I'm lucky because I can't cook to save my life, and I know that if he wanted me to cook like his mother, I would get frustrated. However, my boy's mother isn't much of a cook, either! Phew!

bigestivediscuit 4 years 42 weeks

Uh, no? My bf would never say that ... I'd be so weirded out if he said "that's the way my mom does it" or if he constantly referenced his parents.

LilyLyra 4 years 42 weeks

My fiance is a mama's boy, but he doesn't do everything or want everything done just like his mom does it, thank God. Or else that would drive me crazy.

jessie 4 years 42 weeks

hmmmm...he always trys the "well when i was young, my parents always did....." and i always tell him "i married you, not your parents."

camperbarbie 4 years 42 weeks

I know what you mean Tami, my husband has army habits, luckily he has let some of them go, he says when we have kids they are going to have to do PT for punishment. He is also a bit of a mama's boy though and if I am cooking dinner he comes in and tells me how his mom does it or if I get the side dish wrong, he has to let me know. His mom told me she never taught him to do laundry or dishes, because she didn't want him to break any thing.

Chloe08 4 years 42 weeks

NO thank God!!! In fact, my bf does a lot of things opposite of how his mother did them!

Tami715 4 years 42 weeks

No, he doesn't do things the way his mom did. I think I have it a little worse... Everything has to be done the Army way. It's a pain and I just can't do things to the Army standard, so a lot of the time, he'll just do it himself.