Is It Possible to Truly Forgive?

October 7, 2008

If you tuned into The Hills last night, you saw Heidi's sheepish attempt to make amends with Lauren. And even though Lauren has admitted to missing her ex BFF, it didn't seem like becoming friends again was high on her priority list, especially if Spencer remains in the picture. Since their relationship has been on the rocks — to say the least — for the past two years, Heidi got to fear that too much damage has been done to reconcile. Forgiveness is a personal choice and one that is often incredibly difficult, but tell me if you've been badly hurt by someone you once truly cared for. Is real forgiveness possible, or is the damage caused irreversible?

Photo courtesy of MTV

18 Comments

Kelliegrl 4 years 32 weeks

I'm not sure, I'm working on this issue right now. I'll have to get back to you on this one.

batgirl251 4 years 32 weeks

I hate to say it, but when someone hurts me, I hold a grunge against them forever. Unless it's my sister or something =]. Even if I forgave them, it wouldn't be the same, because every time I would see them, I would get reminded of what they did.

batgirl251 4 years 32 weeks

Lavinie 4 years 32 weeks

i agree- it depends on the situation - depending on what- you can forgive - but i'm finding lately - in my life - it's hard to forget... and as long as you forgive but not forget - friendships change and can't stay the same...

sugarbritches 4 years 32 weeks

100% circumstantial...I've forgiven and it's worked out great, I've also forgiven only to have that same person come back and intentionally hurt me again so I'm very choosy now about what I will be able to forgive or not...

JaimeLeah526 4 years 32 weeks

It's impossible to completely forget. It's always going to be in the back of your mind. In my case it's happened twice (the same exact situation too) and if I ever become friends with her again I will always be worried that she is going to do the same thing again to hurt me. I can't let my guard down and enjoy the friendship in all the ways I could before for fear of getting hurt again.

popgoestheworld 4 years 32 weeks

I think it depends on the magnitude of the offense. If someone really screws me over and they apologize, I would forgive them. I wouldn't have hard feelings. But I would also stop giving them the time of day. I realize that make no sense.

dollhouse 4 years 32 weeks

yesterday's episode of OPRAH, kinda touched a little on FORGIVENESS, she had this guy on the show whose son (Bart i think that was his name) had murdered his wife (bart's mother) and his son(bart's lil bro) and basically he had forgiven his son (Bart) for it. Oprah went on to talk about how basically whenever u forgive someone u let go of that pain/hurt u holding on to, n u can heal from there. just felt like sharin. lol oh well! now to answer the question, i find it so difficult to forgive the people that ive built soo much trust in. i easily trust ppl, so im always gettin burned:(. Im working on learning how to forgive and move pass it.

Le Luxe 4 years 32 weeks

I do not forgive easy. Usually I will just write you off and never talk to you again. But I mean, that is an EXTREME case. If I were LC, I would never talk to Heidi again.

a nonny mouse 4 years 32 weeks

Depends on the person and the circumstances.

Mesayme 4 years 32 weeks

To forgive someone is not an open door. I forgive you that means I'm not going to seek revenge or set out to even the score. You can forgive someone and not allow them to be a part of your life. Now, if you hurt or offend me again...we start all over. This time I may not forgive. You may get sued, go to jail or get your ass whooped...depends on what you did.

queenegg 4 years 32 weeks

Yes, it's possib;e to forgive. I don't watch The Hills and have no idea what you're talking about there, but I do have a friend I would forgive if she asked for it. She dissed me for a boy by believing him when he said that I never gave him a chance, but I did. I even gave him tips on how to keep her because he seemed decent. She ended up kicking me out of our place right before my senior exams. I was a non-traditional, so i couldn't just move home. It effected my grades and obviously, our friendship, but I would forgive her if she proved that she'd realized what she'd done.

bbkf 4 years 32 weeks

I'm not a very forgiving person. If you screw me over, I don't have time for you.

bluestar 4 years 32 weeks

Real forgiveness is a gift and yes, it is possible. Not forgiving someone for something only hurts you.

HeidiMD 4 years 32 weeks

I think you can truly forgive in general. There are some extraordinary circumstances that I would consider "unforgivable."

Marni7 4 years 32 weeks

Speaking in the general sense, and not about this particular hills situation, I would have to say tha twhether I forgive that person or not depends on the severity of what happened . As I have gotten older I have found it easier to forgive (not forget!) people for certain things they have done. Of course they have been minor and if something huge comes up I CAN see myself cutting ties with someone..sometimes u do need to eliminate the negativity from your life in order to move forward

melizzle 4 years 32 weeks

Forgive? Maybe. Forget? Never.

Seka21 4 years 32 weeks

Forgive??! Spencer may be the biggest Pratt in the world but NOONE has the right to make someone feel they need to dump their boyfriend for a friend. Its the wrong priority... your friends dont marry you, have your kids etc.. if i were Heidi Id never forgive Lauren!!! Ive been badly hurt and forgiven but the friendship never truly went back to the way it was and fizzled out. I have one outstanding friend i miss but i know that deep down in my heart i would always look at her as the girl who hurt me... its so hard to turn back time and have things like they once were.

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