Open Letter to a Celebrity*: Jason Davis


Dear Jason,

I'm sure a few people are reading this going...who the hell is Jason Davis? And in fact, that's why I'm writing this to you. *Keep up the good work NOT TRYING to be famous. I'm saluting you, man.

I know that in this celeb-obsessed culture in which we live--what I'm about to say is going to sound crazy--but I dig your style. It says, who needs fame when you're a billionaire oil baron in the waiting?

Your brother, with whom America is unfortunately familiar, doesn't seem to be doing that. It's not enough for him that he's fairly good looking (if you're into "late Elvis," and hey--who isn't?), gets to date beautiful actresses in spite of his yet-to-be-determined merits, and has money coming out of his oily pores. Oh, no. He's got to put his face out there, getting "infamous" for insulting people who earned their fame, hanging with his posse of dubious celebrities who shall remain nameless.

Not for you. No straining for fame-by-association like the likes of Haylie Duff, KFed, or Ali Lohan, whose names I shouldn't even know. You're cool, dude. Stay just the way you are--in the sidelines.

Signed,

A quasi-fan collapsing with exhaustion from celebrity-overload

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