A Lady?

January 5, 2010

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Do you remember the first time you heard yourself referred to as a "lady?" I do. It wasn't too long ago. I was on my way home from an "escaped from" blind date. I stopped in at a fast food restaurant to use the toilet as my drive was long.

The restroom was full of teenage girls, a class trip, all the stalls filled. They were screaming, laughing, having fun, throwing things at one another, piling on lip gloss in front of the mirror while I waited patiently.

A-ha! A stall opens. I go in, straddle but don't sit upon the toilet, and hear: "God! That lady must think we're nuts!"

And, I thought to myself "LADY?!" "I'M NO LADY!!"

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Source Flickr User: mugley

38 Comments

3 years 19 weeks

Allytta I totally agree! I think it's very nice to be called a lady, it's on par with calling a guy a gentleman. I don't mind ma'am either, it's just respectful and denotes good manners. As a kid, I was always taught to answer "si señor" or "si señora" which amounts to yes sir or yes ma'am, to everyone. I went to the U.S. for college and it really freaked me out that professors wanted us to call them by their first names...it just felt so disrespectful to me and I cringed every time. I had one teacher who insisted on it and said she hated ma'am for the same reason as you do: it made her feel old. I currently live in Texas and I think people feel more comfortable with those terms here, though when they say them they are either being formal or ironic.

D-Lee 3 years 19 weeks

i remember the 1st time i was called a lady! it was better than some OTHER things i've been called! LOL! :)

D-Lee 3 years 19 weeks

i rememberthe 1st timei was calleda lady! it wasbetter thansome OTHER thingsi've been called!LOL!:)

Cherlene 3 years 19 weeks

Thank you all for the exceptional comments on my little story. Every single one of you are correct in your very valid opinions and I enjoy them all! Being called a lady is respectful, yes. And, of course, ma'am in particular scenarios, as in public service, it is expected - and in some cases 'policy' by employers. This story was just about the 'first' time you heard yourself referred to as a 'lady' not the intention that it is a bad thing. I had remembered the first time I was called a 'lady', and it took me by surprise. It is that time goes by so quickly. It was as though I was a teenager and then in a blink I was a 'lady'. I am assuming in another blink of an eye I will hear 'that old woman' must think we're nuts. LOL! At the time I was first referred to as a 'lady', I had been standing in that restroom feeling if it had only been yesterday when I would have been on a bus trip with these teenage girls and the shock factor that they saw me as a 'lady' was just that, a shock. And Cheekyredhead, 'yes', being called 'hun' can put me in a headspin, and it is very common in the southern states for that term to be used in lieu of ma'am. What a wonderful response! Thank you! :)

Cherlene 3 years 19 weeks

Thank you all for the exceptional comments on my little story. Every single one of you are correct in your very valid opinions and I enjoy them all! Being called a lady is respectful, yes. And, of course, ma'am in particular scenarios, as in public service, it is expected - and in some cases 'policy' by employers. This story was just about the 'first' time you heard yourself referred to as a 'lady' not the intention that it is a bad thing. I had remembered the first time I was called a 'lady', and it took me by surprise. It is that time goes by so quickly. It was as though I was a teenager and then in a blink I was a 'lady'. I am assuming in another blink of an eye I will hear 'that old woman' must think we're nuts. LOL!At the time I was first referred to as a 'lady', I had been standing in that restroom feeling if it had only been yesterday when I would have been on a bus trip with these teenage girls and the shock factor that they saw me as a 'lady' was just that, a shock.And Cheekyredhead, 'yes', being called 'hun' can put me in a headspin, and it is very common in the southern states for that term to be used in lieu of ma'am. What a wonderful response! Thank you! :)

Venus1 3 years 19 weeks

I don't have concerns over what I'm called as long as the individual is not intentionally trying to to be rude!

cheekyredhead 3 years 19 weeks

I like being called "lady" but "ma'am" reminds me of the time I was in the military...not real great memories there.Today at lunch the waitress called me "Hun" and I nearly went postal. I guess for me it depends on you is calling you what and how they do it.The word that does give me a trigger finger rhymes with "Squat" but starts with a "T".....I will seriously loose it...but that is meant to be a derogatory thing."Hun" is harmless but I just hate it. It is like calling someone who don't know "baby"....just irritates me.

cheekyredhead 3 years 19 weeks

I like being called "lady" but "ma'am" reminds me of the time I was in the military...not real great memories there. Today at lunch the waitress called me "Hun" and I nearly went postal. I guess for me it depends on you is calling you what and how they do it. The word that does give me a trigger finger rhymes with "Squat" but starts with a "T".....I will seriously loose it...but that is meant to be a derogatory thing. "Hun" is harmless but I just hate it. It is like calling someone who don't know "baby"....just irritates me.

secondstar 3 years 19 weeks

Like many have said, if you work with the public you hear it a lot. I'm only 22 but I'm used to hearing it at my retail job. However, I don't think I've ever heard it outside of work. Usually people still mistake me for a teenager.

sham28 3 years 19 weeks

Why is this bad/a big deal? I think it's a nice term.

sham28 3 years 19 weeks

Why is this bad/a big deal? I think it's a nice term.

PinkNC 3 years 19 weeks

Good job Cherlene!

PinkNC 3 years 19 weeks

Good job Cherlene!

Iveenia 3 years 19 weeks

i hope you are encouraged now, Cher - you really pulled that one off ;) :HUG:

bluebellknoll 3 years 19 weeks

Being called a lady doesn't bother me. But I cringe when I'm called ma'am. The first time I was called ma'am was from a Girl Scout selling cookies in the front of my local grocery store. Needless to say, I did NOT buy any cookies!

bluebellknoll 3 years 19 weeks

marcied23 3 years 19 weeks

i'm with glowingmoon, but it's probably because my mom taught us to say yes ma'am, no ma'am etc. she would even refers to us as ma'am if we're asking a question (i thought it was weird when i was a kid, but i do it to my 4 year old niece all the time). anyway, i don't mind being called a lady either, because i believe i carry myself as one (most of the time ;).

GlowingMoon 3 years 19 weeks

I'm in the minority here. I like it when people call me "ma'am." It's derived from "madam," which is a title for a woman. I take it as a sign of good manners and respect. Likewise, I appreciate it when a man (or a woman) holds the door for me. It's kindness, and I don't get insulted as if it's implied I cannot get the door myself.

GlowingMoon 3 years 19 weeks

I'm in the minority here. I like it when people call me "ma'am." It's derived from "madam," which is a title for a woman. I take it as a sign of good manners and respect.Likewise, I appreciate it when a man (or a woman) holds the door for me. It's kindness, and I don't get insulted as if it's implied I cannot get the door myself.

Veka 3 years 19 weeks

I hate it when people "yes, ma'am" me!!

mletrav 3 years 19 weeks

Lady I don't mind. It's ma'am I hate!

sloane220 3 years 19 weeks

lol...nobody really calls me a lady...people seriously still think i look 17 years old.

cherryblossom 3 years 19 weeks

I don't regard lady as something that you begin to be called with age, I look at it as something you are called when you seem to have some class, or a certain air about you that is womanly and sophisticated, but thats just my opinion,

mamasitamalita 3 years 19 weeks

my brother is 11 years younger than I am, and I vividly remember this moment. I was a freshman in high school so he was 3 or 4, and my mom was driving me to dinner with friends before Holiday Ball, which was the only fancy, dress-up school dance freshmen were allowed to attend. I had this gorgeous sparkly navy blue gown on and did my hair all fancy, etc. etc. I was thrilled. My mom stopped at CVS to get me one of those disposable cameras for the evening, and left me in the front seat and my brother in his booster seat in the back. I turned around and said, "Do you think I look nice?" He had a passionate scowl on his face, and said "NO. You look like a lady, not like my sister." To this day it is one of the sweetest compliments I've ever received.

Allytta 3 years 19 weeks

i think it's an american thing to be upset by this. i call myself a lady everytime my BF suggest I might be doing something nasty. and I'm 22. I'm called miss and lady (sometimes even madam) in the shops all the time and it just means they're showing their respect to me no matter my age. What are they supposed to call you then if they don't know your name?

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