How to Handle Critical Parents

Group Therapy: Parental Troubles

This question comes from Group Therapy in our TrèsSugar Community. Feel free to add your advice in the comments!

I recently visited my parents and while I was there, I had a really terrible time.

My parents have always been pretty controlling and my dad in particular is ridiculous. He stopped paying for college because I started dating (I was 19), he said I was a disappointment because I wasn't sure this year if I wanted to apply to medical school or if I wanted to teach instead, etc... My mom is almost as bad. Anyway, when I got home the first thing they did was tell me I should exercise and give me funny looks while I ate a sandwich for dinner, apparently because I am so hugely fat. For the record, I'm pretty appalled at my current weight, but I am no blimp. I'm overweight, not obese, and I do exercise and watch what I eat consistently. However, I was diagnosed the day before with PCOS, hypothyroid, and an autoimmune disorder. My parents knew this and they also knew that I had been really concerned with my weight for the past year. For months I had been trying to lose weight and not really getting anywhere and I was freaking out that I was so tired and having other health problems too.

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So I was basically miserable the entire time I was there because of their remarks about my weight and about my general failure to apply to medical school this year. (I have a 3.88 gpa and I still plan on applying... but I plan to apply next year after I get my health back on track.) At this point I am SICK of dealing with my parents. I've put up with all of this for awhile now, mostly because I feel like I am being a bad daughter. But I am so depressed, like really depressed, every time I have to go visit them. I cry alot, I avoid my dad, I count down the days until I can go home (back to college).

So I was just wondering if anyone had advice for me. Do you think it is acceptable for me to just stop seeing them at this point? I have tried repeatedly to reconcile with them but it seems like they will not be happy until I do things exactly their way.

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