Have You Ever Had a Friend With Benefits?

No, but I wouldn't say "I've managed to avoid this". I'd more say "the opportunity has yet to present itself!" Haha. Being newly single, I wouldn't mind a little "benefit" every now and again...

I did but the guy couldn't take it. Apparently guys still thing No (, I don't want a relationship) means YES (, no but just keep trying). The other guy was a friend and the one time led him to believe that I must be in love with him (I suppose) because our friendship ended pretty fast.

I am not built this way. I've loved everyone I've ever had sex with.

And frankly, while I would never judge people that do - I don't think being a sexual person requires you to have sex without love. I think for many women, love is a necessary component of sex. I literally cannot imagine sex without it.

Many years ago when I was single, I had a friend that when we both between relationships we had the extra benefit...it was off and on for about 3 years until he fell in love. It was kind of monogamous and kept both of us from having one night stands.

I usually have a roster of 2 or 3 on speed dial... The last few months I've been mainly sticking with the same one but he's one of my best friends so, although we love each other dearly in a non-romantic way, we're on the same page when it comes to not getting attached and being free to sleep with other people... Which is good, because I've got 2 new prospects that I'm planning to add into the rotation pretty soon

I've had a few, obviously before I was married. With a couple of them, we tried dating for 2-3 weeks and the long-term aspect just wasn't there. But the chemistry definitely was. With the exception of one, I have remained friends with and love them as a friend. I am of the opinion that love and/or chemistry is not enough for a relationship. I didn't waste time having "official relationships" when there were deal-breakers like financial immaturity and casual drug use. But that didn't mean the hooking up wasn't great. A couple others were legitimate exes. Circumstances kept continuing the relationship from being viable option. I have no regrets. Sometimes removing the constrictions of a relationship can be freeing.

We're now married.

I'm with spacekatgal. I never have and never will. I won't have sex with someone that I'm not in love with.

I'm having sex with my friend w/ Benefits. Who used to date my ex BFF. And I used to date his friend. We been doing this for a year now and haven't told any of our mutual friends. Only some knows. And I would not recommond this. Even if we have made a deal where we say that this will never affect our friendship or its just sex. I have fallen in love with him. And I'm so afraid to tell him cause I don't want to losing him. I will never agree on this kind of thing ever again. Friends with Benefits sucks...

I can have sex without love, but it's difficult to have sex with someone I don't care about. I've had several of these and found no problems, specially if she can separate the two (friendship and sex). Unlike some commentators, though, I wouldn't attempt to hide the relationship from our common friends. That would never work. There are just too many little signals that get thrown around, and frankly, girls have antennae built for this. I could never successfully hide it. I wouldn't ever advertise it, but wouldn't deny it either.

I'm with GregS, I don't have to be in love with someone to sleep with them, but I need to care.

I've done FWB before, and it's a nice arrangement, but I think I'm at a point in my life when I need to figure out what exactly I'm looking for in a long term relationship, not just chasing after sex.

I get attached to easily. Even with the best intentions, I know I would start thinking about him as if I was in love (even if I wasn't).
When I fall in love I need to do so without being to intimate because only that way I know, I am not fooling myself.
My boyfriend and I waited for quite sometime before we had sex.

Ughhh...FWB's are so complicated. My circumstances are a little different, but kinda of go along with #10. My "friend" was a friend of my ex-husbands, and we never did anything or felt anything (at least not on my part) inappropriate during my marriage, but close to the end he was there for me alot as a friend who I could talk to and hear an outside perspective, so I trusted him so much. Then after I left my husband, which has only been 3 months, we started hanging out and doing fun things together. We both established we were attracted to one another, and one night I asked him to kiss me. After an AMAZING, passionate make out session, that was it. We had a great emotional, and physical connection, so a few dates later we had even better sex. He's an amazing lover and I cant get enough of him. BUT I just got out of a marriage and am not ready for a boyfriend yet. He wants so much more and doesnt understand that yes-my marriage was very unhealthy and toxic before I left, but I still need to heal in alot of ways. I consider him a great friend and great lover, but he wants more now. And I cant say I dont want more, eventually though, not now. Not yet. It's just more complicated once you have sex, someone always gets stronger feelings sooner than the other person is ready for and one person always ends up hurt unless BOTH are ready for another monogomous relationship. I cant deny its super fun amd exciting at first, but take it from me, you'll usually end up losing a friend, and not benifit at all in the end.

Nope.

Well, we didn't do anything more than just make out but, hubby and I started out as strictly just friends. Friendship turned friends-with-making out-benefits, which turned into an actual long-term relationship and now we are married.

ive had FWB but never had sex with them, i just fool around and kiss... i think i never had sex with them because deep inside i love them and was wanting to be with them in a serious relatonship...and i was foolish to think that by just fooling around they would ask me to be in a relatoship, because they would want more (sex)....
ive past that fase in my life, and have been with my bf for 2 amazing years!

Yep, two actually. The first was a guy friend and we didn't exactly date, but we hung out a lot and were there for booty calls when we both wanted one. It was good. We're still friends 10 years later. The other started as as my best girlfriend with benefits, which was awesome, then became my girlfriend, and now is a total unqualified disaster. Bad idea there, bad bad idea.

In my line of work it's easy to become jaded to the idea that men could be interested in a woman for anything but sex. So.. YES, i've had friends with benefits.

http://stellablissfromhousewifetowh*re.blogspot.com/

Yes! It is a wonderful arrangement. My FWB is a guy friend. We've always had some attraction and some chemistry, but we quickly figured out that a relationship between us would not work. We'd drive each other crazy, and not in the good way. Besides, we both have different goals in life.

So, we just sleep together and it's awesome.

Once, and I blew it by getting attached. The sex was awesome, I really miss him.

no

Yes, off and on, and now we've been seriously dating for almost 3 years now.

I tried the FWB with an ex and it was a dumb idea. Ended up getting back together only to break up. Sex was good, but we still loved each other which made it a mess. I couldn't have sex with someone I didn't love, but I could see how this arrangement would be convenient for some people.

Not a FWB, but a f*ck buddy. I never thought I would have either. I honestly see this as a one time thing. I do love and care about him. He says he cares about me. It is just one f*cked up, long, messy story.

No, I am one of the weird ones who can't fully enjoy sex with a man unless I care deeply about him. Sex makes me feel a bit vulnerable, so I need to have that trust between us.

Yes I have had two but now i'm in a longterm relationship.