Good Idea or Bad Idea: Cutting People out of your Life

May 30, 2007

The only way you don't know about the fight heard around the world between Rosie O'Donnell and Elisabeth Hasselbeck is if you have been living under a rock. Today, on Rosie's blog, the co-host said, "I haven't spoken to her, and I probably won't, and I think it's just as well."

While it is clear they have never seen eye to eye on world events, do you think it is fair of Rosie to shut out a friend and co-worker over a heated political debate? Or do you think life is too short to end a friendship over a petty disagreement that can easily be worked out with a little effort?

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34 Comments

3 years 9 weeks

Conflict is always around us, in relationships at work, at school, with your best friends or parents. I've often stopped speaking to people and it made me feel terrible. Now days I try to take things most things lightly and try not to get in those situations. When people are being stupid or trying to be hurtful I can easily ignore them. But if I say something back then I feel upset.

melda 5 years 40 weeks

i cut too many stupid girl friends out of my life and i never regret! its good idea

cravinsugar 5 years 51 weeks

Neecalle-Rosie doesn't represent ANYONE's opinion that I know. Not at work, not at home, so don't think she represents the majority. I certainly don't think 9/11 was an inside job, and I want to give all my thanks to every single troop in Iraq-fighting for my freedom. This is all must my opinion though!! :-)

N e e c a l l e 5 years 51 weeks

Lickety, I disagree with saying that Rosie has a different way of viewing the world, I think that her opinions resemble the majority in the world at this time, and the fact that she is "damaged" or "depressed" doesn't make any difference in my opinion, she may be loud and at times obnoxious but she is a strong willed woman who is not afraid to speak her mind about the criminal adminitration that leading the most powerful country in the world, which is something you often do not see in mainstream media. This is all just my opinion though!! :)

N e e c a l l e 5 years 51 weeks

mirawilliams 5 years 51 weeks

I just cut two people (and their partners) out of my life because one tried to cause drama so she could emotionally manipulate me and the other, well - she's her best friend. Long story short, the first woman said something incredibly inappropriate about my culture and I had to cut it off. It's been much healthier for me.

vmruby 5 years 51 weeks

It's a good idea only if the person is always creating alot of drama in your life........

lickety split 5 years 51 weeks

rosie is a very damaged individual. she has a different way of seeing the world because of that and i don't think it's all together healthy. i do think that she is well intentioned and that she firmly believes in her heart that she is "right". she has said that she battles depression and i think that she is depressed right now and acting out of that. anyway, if there are people in your life that limit you and you cannot manage that then your only choice is to cut them out of your life. that makes them sort of "powerful" though, doesn't it? why give them that? to me it's eaiser (now, finally) to ignore the ugly stuff and/or dismiss it as not relevant to my situation. if rosie were to come at me the way she did at elizabeth, on national tv, i think i'd be way more pissed than elizabeth seems to be. UNLESS, i felt something like pity for rosie. then i would be acting the way elizabeth is, so there you go. maybe she knows something the rest of us don't.

lickety split 5 years 51 weeks

cgmaetc 5 years 51 weeks

There is noting wrong with ending a toxic relationship. I have cut people out and I have been cut out. Getting cut out hurt, but I can tell you, it forced me to reflect on what kind of friend I really was.

Hope 5 years 51 weeks

Good idea for Rosie!

Hope 5 years 51 weeks

Good idea for Rosie!

Marci 5 years 51 weeks

I think that there are occasions when we learn over time that someone we've viewed as a friend just isn't in the true sense of the word; they're more work friends or acquaintances. And if someone in my life causes me upset all the time, then I think cutting them out of my life is healthier for me than keeping them in it. So my opinion on that question isyes; there are times when it's a good idea to do that.

Marci 5 years 51 weeks

I think that there are occasions when we learn over time that someone we've viewed as a friend just isn't in the true sense of the word; they're more work friends or acquaintances. And if someone in my life causes me upset all the time, then I think cutting them out of my life is healthier for me than keeping them in it. So my opinion on that question is yes; there are times when it's a good idea to do that.

kendalheart 5 years 51 weeks

Well in the Ro and Elizabeth situation, it wasn't all about politics although that is what started it. You should watch the fight over, it's clearly more about Elizabeth and her lack of her respect for her so called "friend" and standing up for her!

hills 5 years 51 weeks

now i dont knw who they are but if they are truly good friends then they should agree to disagree, u cant just cut people out of ur life like that unless u dont get on and reali dont like that person, every time u hav an argument with somone and cut them out how many people will u have left?

nessabum 5 years 51 weeks

politics? such a minor thing to ruin a friendship and continue to fuel an argument over it to lead it to this point. i think that cutting people out should be reserved for things like bretrayal or meddling.

vanyvrgs 5 years 51 weeks

Sometimes people grow apart. My best friend for over 20 years and I grew very much apart. For years after I came back from college from an outside state (she stayed homebased and did not go to school -- she also did not like to go out and crocheted (sp?)for fun, not that there is anything wrong with that), I would go out with her trying to keep the connection -- even to places I would usually would not be caught dead in just to please her. She did not date and hated when I talked to her about my dates. I would take her out with my other friends and all she did was complain that we basically sucked (making little comments under her breath). One day I had enough. I just did not return her calls again. That was 2 years ago and although sometimes I wonder and hope she is doing well, it was the best thing I did. For years, I kept my friendship with her because she did not have anyone else (but her cats) and I thought she was depressed. I tried talking to her through the years but she basically was misarable and negative. Those people are not necessary in your life. With that said, I do hope she found people more like her and she is happy now.

Miami Gal 5 years 51 weeks

I chose other. In the case of the disagreement, no. But when it resorts to personal attacks because someone doesn't agree on somthing like this, well, that isn't being a friend. I recently got ripped for not being a "good friend" because of my "intolerance". I asked, intolerance to what. Well, it isn't a big secret in my circle that I refuse to be around people on coke...I guess this friend chose the drug over respecting our friendship. I will call here and there and invited him to a party this weekend. He didn't show, all our mutual friends were there and I guess he has issues with their tolerance as well.<p><p>Rosie seems like the type of friend who makes it where it is her way or the highway. This isn't the first time she has treated people like this, and won't be her last. I would think, good riddance nutjob.

Miami Gal 5 years 51 weeks

Rosie seems like the type of friend who makes it where it is her way or the highway. This isn't the first time she has treated people like this, and won't be her last. I would think, good riddance nutjob.

fab4 5 years 51 weeks

I had a friend quit talking to me because she doesn't like my boyfriend's sister (go figure). I'm better without her. Sometimes hanging out with negative people only makes you more negative. I also had to cut out a friend because she couldn't be trusted. I don't feel bad about it at all.

KrisSugar 5 years 51 weeks

well, this disagreement between them seems pretty fundamental, not just like a girl fight. then again, i have thought that way before. Sometimes you just need a break from someone. a long break. i'd say 4 out of 5 times that person ended up back in my life, and the break did us good and taught us some lessons. it doesn't seem like these two would have ever been friends to begin with.

bookgirl 5 years 51 weeks

I don't think its good to cut someone out of your life for a little disagreement or arguement, but when it comes down to just never getting along or your "friend" treating you poorly I say to cut them out. I have several friends that I no longer talk to. Like someone else said, its not easy at first, but it has been for the best. The last one was really hard because it was a married couple. I was friends with the man since highschool and the wife became my friend through him. The wife decided to tell lies about me and some other female friends of his...he didn't believe us so we cut them both off. He'll learn the hard way.

cravinsugar 5 years 51 weeks

I have two examples. One, a friend of mine who was upset with me cut me out of her life. I did not try to contact her for a few weeks, and then was unable to. I do not miss her, but do wonder if she is doing okay. (she is completely unstable and has multiple personality disorder). My other friend would not call me (i always called her) would not visit me (i always visited her) etc. So I just stopped calling and visited. we haven't talked in 3 years. I miss her, but seeing that she didn't care enough to keep up her end of the communication, I suppose I am better off. Right now I am struggling to keep another friend who got jealous of me not leaving her enough myspace comments (sadly this person is 25 and has a child). I am purposefully staying in contact with her even though she does not return the favor because of the incredible guilt trip she laid on me about not being a good friend. (we don't live in the same state.) one day, when I am strong enough, i suppose I will just stop calling her as well, although we were like sisters for so long.Long story short-Id on't think it is okay if done out of anger. if you just drift apart...what can you do?

cravinsugar 5 years 51 weeks

I have two examples. One, a friend of mine who was upset with me cut me out of her life. I did not try to contact her for a few weeks, and then was unable to. I do not miss her, but do wonder if she is doing okay. (she is completely unstable and has multiple personality disorder). My other friend would not call me (i always called her) would not visit me (i always visited her) etc. So I just stopped calling and visited. we haven't talked in 3 years. I miss her, but seeing that she didn't care enough to keep up her end of the communication, I suppose I am better off. Right now I am struggling to keep another friend who got jealous of me not leaving her enough myspace comments (sadly this person is 25 and has a child). I am purposefully staying in contact with her even though she does not return the favor because of the incredible guilt trip she laid on me about not being a good friend. (we don't live in the same state.) one day, when I am strong enough, i suppose I will just stop calling her as well, although we were like sisters for so long. Long story short-Id on't think it is okay if done out of anger. if you just drift apart...what can you do?

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