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Girls: Hannah's Diary

3 Awkward Scenarios and a Relatable Breakup Speech From This Week's Girls

From penis pics to sexual harassment to a deflowering disaster, there's a lot to talk about from last night's Girls episode "Hannah's Diary." The show mainly focuses on Marnie's boyfriend, Charlie, and his buddy reading Hannah's diary and finding out from it that Marnie isn't happy in the relationship. This results in a very-hurt Charlie and his friend singing excerpts from the diary at an open mic night, causing Marnie to be angry at Hannah — instead of the guys who violated their privacy — for writing her brutally honest thoughts on the couple. We'll have to wait 'till next week to find out the fate of Marnie and Charlie (and if Marnie hooks up with sexy artist Booth Jonathon). But what really got us talking today were the super awkward sex-related moments from the episode. Here are the three scenarios that had us cringing, including one that involves a breakup speech we can relate to:

  • The penis pic: The episode begins with Hannah's pseudo-boyfriend Adam sending her a photo of his penis, then following it up with a text that said, "SRY. That wasn't meant for you." Despite Marnie telling Hannah that she shouldn't respond when he basically is telling her he sends dick pics to other girls, Hannah sends him a photo of her boobs back. Eventually though, Hannah realizes she wants more from the arrangement than he does, and she gives him a great breakup speech that actually came from a real breakup email Lena Dunham wrote. She tells him, "I don't even want a boyfriend . . . I just want someone who wants to hang out all the time, and thinks I'm the best person in the world, and wants to have sex with only me." The breakup backfires, but we liked seeing Hannah sort-of stick up for herself for once.
  • A touchy boss: Hannah starts a new nameless job, and right off the bat her old, overweight boss turns an unwelcome back massage into a boob massage. After that incident and a butt pat, Hannah finds out from her fellow female co-workers that he does it to everyone. And they basically tell her to just let him sexually harass her since he's a good boss and a nice guy. Um, gross! From the way they "fixed" her eyebrows (see above picture), Hannah should know better than to take advice from her new office mates.
  • Deflowering gone awry: As the only virgin in the group, Shoshanna is feeling left out from the sexually active bunch, and she's desperate to remedy her situation. She has high hopes in the episode when she bumps into a cute guy from her past who asks her to dinner, but things go from awkward to disastrous during the date. First he tells her she can touch his penis, and she responds with "not until we've kissed." Then after he starts taking off her clothes in the bedroom she asks him if they can have sex. But before they do she tells him she's a virgin, and he tells her he doesn't do virgins because they bleed and get too attached. She counters with, "I so don't get attached when I bleed. You know, it's like amazing. I'm like totally not an attached bleeder." Poor Shoshanna — better luck next time!

What did you think of the episode?

Photo courtesy of HBO

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