Celebrate Uncle Sam With Sarcastic Someecards

Jul 3 2014 - 11:00am

This Fourth of July, we recommend you free yourself from the preholiday workday with some funny Someecards [1]. Shoot these irreverent notes to your long-distance girlfriends, romantic partner, or good-humored family members in the patriotic spirit. Now check out these chuckle-worthy Independence Day ecards, from the flirtatious to the pop culture related!

Source: Someecards [2]

Thank god our Founding Fathers didn't decide to declare independence in winter. [3]

Source: Someecards [4]

Just a reminder that fireworks look even more amazing when you're not constantly checking your iPhone. [5]

Source: Someecards [6]

Good luck extending tomorrow's holiday by sneaking out of work early today. [7]

Source: Someecards [8]

If our forefathers had known how we'd celebrate our freedom, we'd all be British right now. [9]

Source: Someecards [10]

Let's celebrate our independence from Britain by watching Downton Abbey and reading articles about Kate Middleton [11]

Source: Someecards [12]

I can't wait for July 4th when all of my 699 Facebook friends upload identical, colorless pictures of their town's local fireworks onto the news feed! [13]

Source: Someecards [14]

This Independence Day, I intend for you to provide me all of the fireworks that I'll ever need. [15]

Source: Someecards [16]

I'm going out to celebrate my independence if it's okay with you. [17]

Source: Someecards [18]

This Independence Day I would like to celebrate my financial dependence on my parents. [19]

Source: Someecards [20]

Happy Fourth of July! You can toss out the Christmas tree now. [21]

Source: Someecards [22]

"I think my husband would be really great at setting off fireworks" said no one ever. [23]

Source: Someecards [24]

Let's celebrate this Independence Day by sleeping with other people. [25]

Source: Someecards [26]

I hope the irony of scheduling your wedding so close to Independence Day isn't lost on you. [27]

Source: Someecards [28]

I am drinking something red from a white cup with a blue straw. This is as patriotic as I am going to get! [29]

Source: Someecards [30]

I am now taking offers for all 4th of July parties! [31]

Source: Someecards [32]

This Independence Day, my only goal is to not hear Martina McBride sing about a homicidal woman. [33]

Source: Someecards [34]

Happy Independence Day from one codependent to another. [35]

Source: Someecards [36]

I plan to spend this Independence Day over a carton of chocolate ice cream, wondering why I'm still independent. [37]

Source: Someecards [38]

Happy National 'Hear Fireworks All Day and Night Being Set Off by Drunk People You Wouldn't Trust With a Glow Stick' Day! [39]

Source: Someecards [40]

This July 4th, let's celebrate our complete independence from the English . . . except, of course, for television show concepts. [41]

Source: Someecards [42]

May your hangover be as annoying and painful as those fireworks you were still shooting off at 1:00 on the morning. [43]

Source: Someecards [44]

You mean to tell me that a guy who can cram 68 hot dogs down his throat in 10 minutes isn't an athlete? [45]

Source: Someecards [46]

Baby, you're a firework. Exciting at first but eventually becoming loud, obnoxious, and repetitive. [47]

Source: Someecards [48]

July 4th: a day where we Americans drink beer and celebrate how little we know about our own country's history. [49]

Source: Someecards [50]

Oh Joy!!! I can't wait to get home and watch all the blurry, out of focus video uploads of fireworks my friends have posted! [51]

Source: Someecards [52]

Honestly, I can probably guess what you did yesterday . . . the same thing I did, so no I don't want to know what you did on July 4th. [53]

Source: Someecards [54]

Fireworks always look better after 4 shots of Jack Daniels. Happy 4th of July! [55]

Source: Someecards [56]

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